Thansgiving vs. The Avian Flu
Posted: November 20th, 2005, 1:10 pm
Thanksgiving vs. The Avian Flu
(AP*) The Centers for Disease Control and the National Health Institutes have released a joint report warning the American public to beware of eating turkey on Thanksgiving due to concerns about the spread of avian flu. Officials warn that migratory birds may have infected some commercial turkey operations.
Turkey is the traditional main course on many American tables on Thanksgiving, It is a symbol of bounty and sharing. "Even so," says a spokesman for the CDC, "the prudent American Red Stater this year should consider pork, the other white meat."
In keeping with administration policy of promoting fear wherever possible and keeping the public in a general state of panic, the agency report recommended that if consumers decide to serve turkey, that the turkey should be vaccinated with one of the expensive serums produced by the pharmaceutical companies. This will even work on frozen turkeys according to industry spokesmen.
Happy Thanksgiving.
*Associated Parodies
(AP*) The Centers for Disease Control and the National Health Institutes have released a joint report warning the American public to beware of eating turkey on Thanksgiving due to concerns about the spread of avian flu. Officials warn that migratory birds may have infected some commercial turkey operations.
Turkey is the traditional main course on many American tables on Thanksgiving, It is a symbol of bounty and sharing. "Even so," says a spokesman for the CDC, "the prudent American Red Stater this year should consider pork, the other white meat."
In keeping with administration policy of promoting fear wherever possible and keeping the public in a general state of panic, the agency report recommended that if consumers decide to serve turkey, that the turkey should be vaccinated with one of the expensive serums produced by the pharmaceutical companies. This will even work on frozen turkeys according to industry spokesmen.
Happy Thanksgiving.
*Associated Parodies