meet the next hunter s thompson!

Post by **firsty** » September 25th, 2006, 2:54 pm

http://yardbarker.com/

(me)

hah. just kidding. anyway, for as long as it lasts, my first column on yardbarker.com, a sports news site in its early stages, has made it to the top of the main page.

yay me.

written in a somewhat stupor as i watched football last nite, it's an overlong and rambling ode to the nfl, madness and hst. my idea was to write from only my perspective - that of a football and hockey fan to a fault, also burdened with the knowledge that we're all going to hell in a bucket baby. i absolutely ripped off hst in that first column, but, i was mostly drunk, and i gotta start somewhere, eh?

Post by **Doreen Peri** » September 25th, 2006, 5:16 pm

i couldn't find your article..

what's your posting name there?

got a direct link to your article?

Post by **mnaz** » September 25th, 2006, 5:30 pm

Doreen, click the "NFL" link on the left panel on the main page....

firsty: ....enjoyed the read.... What is real, or true anymore?.... in football, or the "news"?.

btw.... Amen to that part about simple blocks called as holds.... (As any Seahawks fan can attest after the Big Game last February)....

Post by **gypsyjoker** » September 25th, 2006, 8:32 pm

Nice work if you can get it doc.

This is a strange time for football. Still too warm. Simply not enough weather. The only game that had any visible strangeness to it was the Ravens - Browns game. Everything is strange in Ohio

Oh yeah.

More later.

Post by **gypsyjoker** » September 26th, 2006, 12:05 am

I did not actually see the game so I suppose this is off topic. But anything about Baltimore/Cleaveland gets me ranting and raving about the good old days.
I think about the Giants Bears playoff back in the days when men were real men.
YA Title with his busted nose and blood streaming down his face. Must have been below freezing that day. I can't remember what year it was.

Do you remember the bit about football in The Thousand Year Old Man?

"back in those days we used to play with a granite football."
"I bet it took a real man to throw it?"
"Yeah and it took a real idiot to catch it."

(from memory)

My heart has never recovered from the night that plumber from Chicago snuck out of town in the middle of the night with my beloved Colts. So Baltimore did the same thing to Cleveland. I have been trying hard to become a Packer fan but I just can't get my heart into pro football anymore. I enjoy the college and high school games more. I enjoyed your column firsty. I still dream of the 1958 Colts Giants championship game, the first sudden death overtime in the history of the NFL. Johnny in his high top black shoes. Now every time I see highlights from the greatest game every played I feel so old to see those black and white television clips. I remember shouting my lungs out and dancing with joy when Johnny the riverboat gambler pulled out another miraculous victory with his two minute drill. Down the sidelines to Ray Berry. Raymond Berry the gimp with one leg shorter than the other. The enemy teams knew what was coming but were powerless to stop it. Reminds of Jim Brown with the Browns. Every other play was a hand off to Brown. Him running down field with two or three tacklers hanging onto him. He was Paul Brown's whole offense, the other team knew what was coming too but could not stop him. I wish I could care about a team's fortunes the way I used to. Now I only check the standings to see if Baltimore and Indianapolis are losing. I am happy if they lose. What was black and white television called before there was color TV?

I enjoyed your column firsty.
please pardon ramble.

Post by **firsty** » September 26th, 2006, 9:49 am

i enjoyed yr ramble, st.

football is a wonderful sport. ray berry came to me via one of my elementary teachers, who preached about berry's limp and the fact that he was nearly blind and still a great receiver. the good ol underdog story.

i dont know what i'm going to do when the bills leave buffalo. it's bound to happen. upstate new york is fully fucked on all counts. thank God for ralph wilson, but he isnt going to live forever.

the nfl is becoming too much like arena football for my taste. i enjoyed last nite's game in nola, tho. good stuff. punt block, blocked field goal, some great running.

i saw the baltimore colts play in buffalo only a year or two before they ran out under cover of darkness. they started the whole problem of nfl teams holding cities for ransom. bigger stronger better domes with fancy box seats. blah.

Post by **firsty** » September 26th, 2006, 11:23 am

kickass. sportingo also published the column. i like how they headlined it, too.

check it out and rank me!

http://www.sportingo.com/other-sports/a ... n/1001,481

Post by **singlemalt** » September 26th, 2006, 1:38 pm

where's the violence? the nudity?

come on man, don't let us down.

Post by **Arcadia** » September 26th, 2006, 1:42 pm

"Unless you're a creationist, disbelief in evolution leading you to insist that things always have been the way they are now." Wow...! are you sure you drank only Bacardi?? mmm.... was there tobacco in your pipe?
the chicken pigs were eating other chicken pigs? what's a chicken pig???

sorry, but these are the only comments I can do about your article... (I'm totally ignorant in American Football).

Post by **firsty** » September 26th, 2006, 1:52 pm

Arcadia wrote:"Unless you're a creationist, disbelief in evolution leading you to insist that things always have been the way they are now." Wow...! are you sure you drank only Bacardi?? mmm.... was there tobacco in your pipe?
the chicken pigs were eating other chicken pigs? what's a chicken pig???

sorry, but these are the only comments I can do about your article... (I'm totally ignorant in American Football).

i'm not sure i know what you mean.

there will be nudity at some point in the future, i can guarantee that. keep reading.

Post by **stilltrucking** » September 27th, 2006, 4:33 am

Arcadia the amercian football is sometimes described as a "pig skin" I suppose because it was once made from pig bladders. Maybe that is what Firsty meant.

Speaking of pigs and evolution I remember going to the head during one of the Colt games and thinking about the fifty thousand fans in the stadiium pissing and shitting. Like one mass of meat, one organism.

The Lady's Dressing Room
Jonathan Swift
1732
Thus finishing his grand Survey, [115]
Disgusted Strephon stole away
Repeating in his amorous Fits,
Oh! Celia, Celia, Celia shits!

But Vengeance, Goddess never sleeping
Soon punish'd Strephon for his Peeping; [120]
His foul Imagination links
Each Dame he sees with all her Stinks:
And, if unsav'ry Odours fly,
Conceives a Lady standing by:
All Women his Description fits, [125]
And both Idea's jump like Wits:
By vicious Fancy coupled fast,
And still appearing in Contrast.
I pity wretched Strephon blind
To all the Charms of Female Kind; [130]
Should I the Queen of Love refuse,
Because she rose from stinking Ooze?
To him that looks behind the Scene,

http://ethnicity.rutgers.edu/~jlynch/Te ... ssing.html

. It always interests me that Buddhism talks about the breath and Freud so concerned with potty training.
There is an interesting book called Life Against Death. I have been talking about it here and on litkicks for going on seven years. I have never gotten any feedback about it. The book is about Freud and Swift. Filthy lucre was one of the chapters. He talks about a disease called man.

Perhaps the only true dignity of man is his capacity to despise himself. -Santayana

The only constant is change they say.

Firsty what is and interesting sidebar is how that Irshay or what ever his name is got to own the Colts. Rosenbloom the owner of the Colts wanted to own the LA Rams but NFL regulations prohibit one individual from owning two teams. So he got Irshay to buy the Rams and then they traded teams. Years later Rosenbloom drowned and there were rumours that it he was murdered. Witnesses claimed to have seen scuba divers surface around him just before he drowned off a beach in Florida.

I suppose the only team that is safe is the Green Bay packers. The team is owned by the city. Every baby born in Green Bay is given a little green and yellow blanky. Green and yellow. What a lovely combination of colors.

Plenty of nudity, well even better than nudity, semi nudity, I think the Dallas Cowboy cheer leaders started that. America's team, another team that I am happy to see lose.

Baltimore used to be the Dallas Texasns in the All-American Football Conference before they moved to Baltimore in the fifties after the A-AFC folded. When the NFL & AFL merged Baltimore was moved to the AFL. I think Joe Namath had a lot to do with that. Remember the bidding wars between the NFL and AFL for college players? No probably not, were you even born then? When Namath got that four hundred thousand dollar signing bonus things had gotten out of hand we all agreed. Football could not aford to throw that kind of money around.

unedited babble
there i go again.

Post by **mtmynd** » September 27th, 2006, 11:43 am

firsty, i'm as confused as Arcadia - what the hell is a chicken pig (The chicken pigs werent the only cannibals around.) and does one need bacardi and puff to see them..?

Post by **firsty** » September 27th, 2006, 11:54 am

heh. well, i think i'm confused about what arcadia quoted about creationism etc.

the chicken pig is a wild animal that eats its friends and family, often during community meetings, which are held around controlled bonfires. they will be discovered thousands of years from now, pieced together from the bones surrounding what we currently refer to as barbecue pits.

you won't need to be huffing or puffing thousands of years ago to believe in the chicken pig, but, i will acknowledge, knowledge of the future discovery of chicken pigs did come to us via much huffing and puffing.

i hope this clears things up.

Post by **firsty** » September 27th, 2006, 3:18 pm

hey hey hey!

i got the article posted at newsvine.

if you go and if you like the article, then please vote for it. this will seed it higher and get it more exposure.

i'm going to post regular articles there, so feel free to favorite-ize me.

newsvine, btw, is a great news source.

http://firsty.newsvine.com/_news/2006/0 ... perunknown

Post by **mtmynd** » September 27th, 2006, 4:03 pm

Nice piece of writing, firsty! The piece sounds like you're in your element. It comes thru very clearly and passionately. Congratulations, old bean!

Sorry I can't vote for you. It would require I sign up. I don't do that unless I need it.

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meet the next hunter s thompson!

meet the next hunter s thompson!

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