True Romance On That "Special" Day

[Toerag]

(Or, What To Do When Ya Forgot Your Anniversary)

Is today your anniversary?
Well from the bottom of your heart,
Show your love how much ya care,
And head out to K-Mart.

Let your love pick out a card,
One that she'll adore,
Read it there-then put it back,
(You'll save two bucks or more).

Then just wait patiently,
For a sale to be announced,
Perhaps a "Blue Light Special?
On a bra or wool night gown.

Then take her out for supper,
A dinner just for two,
A Big Mac or a Whopper
It's really up to you.

Then swing on by the graveyard,
(Flowers are always nice)
Grab a bottle of Ripple,
(It's quite tasty over ice).

Tell her how much ya love her,
As you passionately kiss your mate,
Get outta your clothes immediately,
Before the kids awake!

[Doreen Peri]

I read this and I wondered
if you know my Ex!
It was our anniversary
and after he had sex
with our neighbor's daughter
he came home, invited me
to the K-Mart where he had
a surprise in store for me!

Much like this very story
which you kindly have relayed,
he made me feel like such a queen
in each and every way!
When we came back from K-Mart
with the gifts I had selected
he crowned me on my noggin
so I didn't feel neglected!

I screamed, "Oh NO! That hurts, you know!"
He answered, "You're my Queen!
And you've been crowned to prove it,
how I love you, sweet Doreen."


(yours was funnier... mine is damn morbid... LOL!)

[sooZen]

hey toe...this was darn funny and clever too. Mtmyndl and I have been married so long we both forget our Anniversary day and find ourselves remembering days or weeks after..."o yeah, was it the 32nd or 33rd year?" heh. January 12 had already rolled by and we had taken no note. I can't even remember how old I am most of the time or the ages of my children now, I have to stop and figure. We are all just assured that we are and will be...

SooZen