my resolutions for 2018
Posted: January 14th, 2018, 2:30 pm
1. To continue subsidizing the alcholic beverage industry, that they might enjoy continued prosperity
2. To play my air guitar only when I am alone and unobserved, and not on public transport
3. To cease invoking the dark gods Cthulhu and Yog-Sothoth just because my neighbor's dog won't stop barking
4. To never again let fugu, broiled centipede, or spotted owl pass my lips
5. To boycott purveyors of GMO underwear
6. To use my superpowers only for the good
7. To donate my collection of wild scat to the Associated Sportsmen Club
8. To accept my limitations as a heart surgeon
9. To begin proper disposal of the used fuel rods from my breeder reactor
10. To never, ever vote Republican, or let any of my family and friends do so
2. To play my air guitar only when I am alone and unobserved, and not on public transport
3. To cease invoking the dark gods Cthulhu and Yog-Sothoth just because my neighbor's dog won't stop barking
4. To never again let fugu, broiled centipede, or spotted owl pass my lips
5. To boycott purveyors of GMO underwear
6. To use my superpowers only for the good
7. To donate my collection of wild scat to the Associated Sportsmen Club
8. To accept my limitations as a heart surgeon
9. To begin proper disposal of the used fuel rods from my breeder reactor
10. To never, ever vote Republican, or let any of my family and friends do so