calling out truckin and joker

Hang out. Talk trash.
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K&D
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Post by K&D » September 3rd, 2005, 1:37 pm

i did call my mother, i think it was a good thing that i did. i've been talking to my mother a lot since i got here. now, i just need to start doing it with my dad. why did i tell some creepy old man? i don't know i didn't really think about it. like i said it really hasn't hit me yet. i think i kind of thought about not telling you but i don't know felt like that would be censoring or something.

my mom was really happy i called, i could tell, she thought it was nice that i tried so many times to get through to her in Baton Rouge, where its very hard to do so.

i think i deal with death differently then everyone else, everyone else always seems sto go immediatly to dealing with it, i seem to have this thing where i put it off untill i have enough time to deal with it...part of me thinks thats not such a good thing.

i didn't know my papaw too well, he was quite...clike people from his decade were. i use to think he looked like Johnny Cash, and that that was cool, that my papaw looked like Cash. he only spoke when it had meaning, i think a lot of people from his generation are like that, now a days were constantly talking and half of it is bullshit.
Blah!

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » September 3rd, 2005, 5:06 pm

Promise me one thing princess that you will remember how grouchy old men can get. I believe I am the oldest one here. Certainly the weirdest. My brain is wired all wrong. that AS thing I told you about.
I think I handle death the same way you do. It works for me, I hope it works for you. It has to come and bits and pieces, take time to deal with grief, as I said no matter how much you think you are prepared it still hits hard. Alamo Rose suffering bad, she got her last request to die at home. After two weeks she finally died. Buy the end of the second week I was emotionaly exhausted, hoped the end would come soon. But when it did it hit hard. Took me a couple of days or years or weeks, I can't remember when I realized I would never see her again never talk to her again I cried. But now I dream of her once in a while and I never wake in despair when I do. SOrry to be so maudlin.

I just want you to find some joy, I worry about you being a dorm rat, (not an insult just a term those of us who either could not afford to or who were pyschologicaly un-able to deal with dorm life, that is what we called it.) Bad year don't know why that second year is so tough. Tell me about something you love to do besides aggravating old men :wink: I am interested in hearing about your dorm room, how big, do you have a kitchen. Man living without a kitchen is a drag. When I need help with my depression making a pot of soup is good therapy.
got to go now. write when you can. Tell me something that makes you happy.

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K&D
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Post by K&D » September 3rd, 2005, 5:56 pm

here's something you'll enjoy.

today is the school's boncy day, day. meaning they have all this inflatable things to play wiht, last year it rained so it wasn't quite as fun. this year i was dubed, Cool Hand Luke of bouncy things. i weigh about 120 pounds a little less then most of my friends but i am what they call a lover of punishment and everyoce in a while i keicked there asses...they glorify it as a spark. they say "i've got the weight advantage but she's got the spark"

theres this one game where you'r connected by a rope and your hooked together and you basicly pull eachother back and forth...and try to get a ball in a basket on your end of the pull. i kept going and going, dizzy as fuck and tired as fuck and i still heald my own. i think thats part of my personality that my friends respect. the idea that i don't give up.

anyways it was a ball, i did have to practivcly be carried back to my room. i scratched up my armb a bit. no big deal.

dormitory is fucking small. i live here, with two of my closest friends rooming together down the hall. steph and shayna. shayna is the skitsophrenic one...steph is the "lover" of the group, really into guys. but she's also the poet of the group.

i live in my room with my roomate halley, who me and my friends hate, she's always intiting us to go places with her, she thinks herself a hippie when really shes a very insacure fake person. the dormroom is too small. i cleaned it today so i could better think. but its mostly full of my roomates shit. but i have food in here i make sandwiches and chips and easymac. there is no fridge, its so small. my bed is so fucking close to my roomates...and she talks to me in her sleep almost every other night. the colllege i go to is a liberal arts school sometimes i think i'm the most sane here.

i also sometimes, particularly last night think i'm the only one who isn't getting drunk and stoned. i mean i do do that occasonally, last night the freshman on campus went crazy and so did a lot of other people.

yes i enjoy aggrivating old men. my mentor the one i talked about earlier, and a lot actually. is turning 62 in december. i make mix cds for him. i hope he doesn't think our relationship is weird.
Blah!

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K&D
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Post by K&D » September 3rd, 2005, 5:58 pm

i've always said, something that makes me happy is hearing what makes others happy, i like hereing stories that make people feel a godo way, good memories...stories. i think thats why i like talking to old people, they seem to have better stories and tell them in a different mannor, they seem to be more effected by them, and they tend to have a better sence of what they like.
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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » September 3rd, 2005, 6:27 pm

Thanks sparky. Bouncy day sounds cool. I been Studying your avatar, my eyes not what they used to be. I had to magnify it. You have a beautiful smile. What is that yellow thing behind your head? I got a compilation a college woman gave to me when I worked in a drive in movie a couple of years ago. Interesting mix. The ones that come to mind are Polyester bride, all along the watch tower, and big butts.

Trying to think of something happy that happened to me today. A storm is passing over today, thunder makes me happy, rain, the weather here can be so oppressive, a welcome change from days and days high humidity high temps, overcast sky, I am in san antonio too. Most nights I can't see the stars at night that does not make me happy, the desert sky at night makes me happy.
Santa Fe I been through there so many times cut off the interstate around santa fe pick up two lane road headed for oregon and washington state. Never seen the good side of that city either.

talk to you later. Hope you have a good weekend and a safe holiday.

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K&D
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Post by K&D » September 3rd, 2005, 6:38 pm

all along the watchtower...still a college classic, along with the doobie brothers "listen to the music," was always a bigger fan of "fat bottom Girls" not "big Butts"

i'm wearing a costume. i'm a cat burglar, get it i'm wearing all black and i have cat ears on. in the avitar.

the other thing, fucking sucks about my dorm is my roomate this year, the annnoying one, is always watching t.v. its very destracting, i have a hard enough time paying attention when there's quite.

i collect rock posters. my room is full of them. and a regular Gratefuldead poster. the rock posters, most of them are hand drawn by my friends father, he gives some to me for free and i buy some from him as well. i also have those postcards they sell at barns and nobles, friends have bought them from me. one of abbie hoffman, one of Dylan and two of Kerouac.

i'm a weird morner, i also have on this little, bulleten board a pic of George Harrison, Hunter s. Thompson and Warren Zevon...those were big deaths for me...in paticular Harrison and Zevon. its weird i felt like i loved those guys and i didn't know them. Hunter i think doesn't get enough respect.

i'm on because i tried reading Zen and Motercycle Maintanince for class but couldn't focus..and its 30min to dinner so i figure after dinner i can tell my roomate to turn the t.v off.
Blah!

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » September 3rd, 2005, 7:17 pm

I am a slow reader. I have been reading two books for over thirty years. Pick them up every couple of months and put them down. Phenomenology of Internal Time Consciousness, Edmond Husserl, Life Against Death, Normon O Brown. I like Kerouac a lot but I am not that fond of his portrayal of women. Seems shallow to me. Thompson I have never read any of his books completely, just bits and pieces. I like his style, his voice. Zevon's death hit me hard. Harrison too. Seemed so unfair. The Zen Motorcycle book I have not even tried to read from the beginning, but I have read the Afterwards part twice. The future coming up behind us I like that a lot. I took a night course in the Classics department at Johns Hopkins. A school with a renowned classics department. It was bliss, an assistant professor from the day school taught it. One of those professors who loved to teach and loved what he was teaching (not unlike zlatko I bet) Also took two semesters of French, read The Stranger in French. Another wonderful professor there. Any chance of getting moved around a different room mate?

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K&D
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Post by K&D » September 3rd, 2005, 8:08 pm

maybe, my friend, Heather, she's like my sister, she drove down here from N.C, she flew down from Los Alamos to drive back with me. she's living by herself upstairs, and i don't think she likes it mayb'e all room with her...then i'll have to move again and i wonder if its worth it.

when harrison died, damn i was in this sort of denial mode for a month, i was just in shock. i felt like the old world was loosing and the new world, my world...my generation, kind of sucked. Harrison, was a great man.

same with Zevon, his life and the fact that he had faults and dealt with them and his sence of humor, i don't know i hope to be more like Harrison and Zevon...i think its more likely that i'd become more like Zevon...that self deprecating humor...i definaetly got that. the fact that he went so unrecognized, that kind of sucked, that also made me more sad, like again a sign that things were different...people in general are not the same.

When Harrison died, he was the first person that i knew that had died, i mean i'd never had any family membors that died, he was like the first person who died that i had to deal with it. i felt like it was very symbolic, like his death was a sign of the times, and not a happy one.
Blah!

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » September 3rd, 2005, 11:22 pm

Indigo children.
I have been fortunate to make one friend from litkicks, the only woman who never really flamed me. she is interested in indigo children,.



Looking for signs, dam girl you getting religious on me or something?

I don't get the bit about moving and having to move back again. why can't you stay moved.

I lived off campus, first in a rooming house than I moved into an apartment with some friends i made there. The lady who ran the rooming house was nice. Except she did not want any of those dark skined Jewish boys there. I passed for white I guess.



Speaking about women over thirty
Image
Diane Rehm, she has a show on NPR, I listen to her everyday. I used to think she was a black woman because of her accent. But she is Leabnese American. Is she beautiful or my eyes shot?

Just woke up thinking of a Dylan song, for some reason.

You just kinda wasted my precious time

But don't think twice, it's alright
Last edited by stilltrucking on September 4th, 2005, 10:18 am, edited 1 time in total.

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K&D
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Post by K&D » September 4th, 2005, 2:33 am

i today thought of the line from that song "we never did too much talkin anyways" i commonly have that line run thru my head, not bececause of any relevancy, just because i like the way he says it, its afunny line. music now adays has to state everything, he always implied things.

i'm hereing all this grinding noise.

tonight we had fun with the freshman who habitually lights up around this time. Jen was standing sniffing outside her door, and she's an R.A, they opened and saw here and closed it really fast saying "fuck"

then i wrote on the whiteboard on there door, "we know what you do, your friendly R.A and and unhappy face"

they know were just giving them shit because a couple days i yelled "learn to share"

me getting religious...never.

i don't know if she's that good looking, but its a matter o opinion right.

we went ice skating tonight, with some new girl. she, we think, flirted with the girl who worked ther the whole time and my friends didn't like her because she didn't respond well to my sence of humor. were kind of a weird group and she was pretty straight, other then my hypothesis that she is a lesbian.
Blah!

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » September 4th, 2005, 10:20 am

I still don't get the bit about having to move again. You are leaving something out. Is heather living by herself temporarilly? Why can't yu finish the semester as her room mate?

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K&D
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Post by K&D » September 4th, 2005, 12:52 pm

i am currently living with my annoying roomate. i have a friend upstairs who has what we call a double as a single..meaning she got lucky and doesn't have a roomate, i could move in with her....but i have to find a good time, because i don't want to whole moving processe to interupt my studdies...i hate moving.
Blah!

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » September 4th, 2005, 3:34 pm

hate moving
ten four
me too
but you got a long weekend coming up
it is still early in the semester
when would be a better time?

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K&D
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Post by K&D » September 4th, 2005, 5:37 pm

i don't know...good point, thats what all my friends are telling me. i haven't been myself lately so i was using this weekend to get things together, i think i may finish all of the "nessisary" homework today and maybe move tommorow...i don't know i fhave to talk to my R.A.

i've got the worst R.A, it was like a joke when i heard who it was. once we were following around our friend colin, he was shrooming for the first time and theres not much to do so we thought we'd watch him for fun. my futur R.A was shrooming that night too and got all worried that we were watching her and claimed we gave her a bad trip.

in another incident the first time i met her, we were in a car with a bunch of her theater major friends, you know those types of girls...the "beautiful people" and she mentioned her name and i remember Colin talking about her so i asked, no qualms or anything about it "oh, do you smoke pot" because i didn't know if she was the same person. she got all defensive. latter on i find out she's a big shroomer...and does smoke pot, and her answer was...only occasionally.

we make fun of this thing she was once caught doing while shrooming. she would sort of stair at the floor and walk like a dinasoaur with her armbs up like they were dinasour armbs....and this wom enb is put incharge of running my floor?

plus generally speakingj she's kind of like "i'm too cool for you" and really definsive and she doens't do any of the things an R.A is suppose to do.
Blah!

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » September 5th, 2005, 1:44 pm

i haven't been myself lately
:)

Maybe it is time for a new sn. A different hand puppett called sparky?

It suits you. No just joking. So who have you been lately if not yourself? Just curious. Also what courses are you taking. I miss college life. Maybe I could get a contact high. A vicarious virtual college buzz, I realy been thinking about taking a freshman course in English. MS Word is driving me crazy. Every other sentence I right is a fragment. Thinking about Hemingway and his comment about if he could write one true sentence he knew he had it made.

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