moon dance

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SmileGRL
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moon dance

Post by SmileGRL » May 28th, 2009, 11:46 am

sickle moon,
i send my wish to you
i send my hunger
i send my ache
i send my guitar wedding cake

i reach my arms, my hands
my fingers stretched
on toes i dance
stretch. arch. control
lose all my emotions to you
catch it back
hold to my soul
hold
hold
if i could dance like an angel
on muscled legs
on clouds of beautiful
on soul
pump me full
pump me full
eat my fill of wedding cake
instead i sit here
here i sit

sickle moon,
i send my empty to you
no child to hold
no dance
no you

.

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constantine
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Post by constantine » May 28th, 2009, 7:36 pm

an unusual poem - a spectrum of emotion - light, yet painful at the same time.

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SmileGRL
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Post by SmileGRL » May 29th, 2009, 10:03 am

thank you kindly, dino. i had a semi writers block for a couple of weeks and this was a result of things brewing inside, seeing a breathtaking crescent moon when i took my dog out the other night and watching tv reality shows (particularly a cake diva marathon and the beginning of my favorite dance show). i always connect the weirdest things in my head. so...that's classic crazy "Smile" for you. haha. plus i hate writing about painful these days because it makes me feel so pathetic, but at the same time i can't ignore the words standing in line to be spoken. and i'd like to say i deliberately made it light, but that would be a lie...that's just how it came out.

oh...maybe i should explain this a little...the guitar wedding cake represents some of my whimsical and almost impossible dreams & posibilities. i really can't say more about that except it's a little insider joke.

:mrgreen:

Yejun
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Post by Yejun » May 30th, 2009, 7:03 pm

This is going to sound strange (and I may be influenced by HP's "On the Beach" reference) but I kept reading the cake as "yellow cake".

For me, it created an ominous mood.

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SmileGRL
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Post by SmileGRL » June 2nd, 2009, 2:28 pm

yejun...maybe it's the moon that colored the cake yellow :wink: (the kid in me believes that the moon is made of cheddar cheese. and why not?) so, you are welcome to have yellow cake. personally i like chocolate. :mrgreen:

i did not intend the poem to be ominous. just a little lament-y dance. i do know that moods create like, but i also believe that we need to acknowledge our inner voices when they speak, both positive and negative. a friend of mine correctly identified my last two poems as venting. like when you open a window to let out the mustiness and let in the fresh air, sort of.

thank you for reading.

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.Lucy.
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Post by .Lucy. » June 9th, 2009, 1:12 pm

This poem made me hungry for cake and tea, yet the sadness in it made me feel as though I'd eaten a pound of ground beef ( heavy on my vegan stomach.)

It is an interesting mix of both happy and melancholic emotions, and I am able to catch little sprinkles of hidden wishes hoping to be fulfilled in there too...
The road to happiness: Perseverance, Endurance and a whole lot of Hope.

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SmileGRL
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Post by SmileGRL » June 11th, 2009, 3:04 pm

this is what happens when you have a silly imagination like mine that takes random things that happen during my day week month and mix them into a poem about feelings...it all gets a little mixed up. :wink:

ps. all those cake shows had me drooling for a big slice of cake all week too. it became a red velvet cake with french vanilla icing this weekend

Yejun
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Post by Yejun » June 13th, 2009, 4:49 pm

sickle moon,
i send my wish to you
i send my hunger
i send my ache
i send my guitar wedding cake
Read this again and thought of Ted Hughes in the 60's and 70's.

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goldenmyst
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Post by goldenmyst » June 13th, 2009, 9:47 pm

Grl, your poems rock. This one took me from exhalation to deep sadness. You write like fine classical music with allegros and adagios. Well done my friend.

John

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SmileGRL
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Post by SmileGRL » June 17th, 2009, 1:39 pm

thanks guys.

yejun...i saw a movie about ted hughes & sylvia plath the other day. i'm curious, what about this made you think of him?

john, thank you for recognizing the allegros and adiagos. you always pay attention.

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