(aab ccb ddb eeb ffb ggb hhb)

[joel]

When wind on weakest whistles winds,
akin to certain childish kinds
of failed attempts at melody—

when breeze through bristles blows
again and, preening pines, it throws
their needles down and sets them free—

when streams of air are stripped and bare
and thinned of oxygen, but fair
refresh from stale humidity—

when little birds through bushes flit
and spin therein before they sit
and rest and wake haphazardly—

when flower petals fold and fail
like sin whose wages evenings hail
with hope tomorrow still to be—

when particles’ vibration starts
to quiver sounds in ears and hearts
that fall like love for you from me

then maybe – like the autumn – pray
that when the old all falls away
what follows falls abundantly.

[happytrails]

Joel, I had to read this several times, before I realized that I actually like it. I knew there was something, but not sure what so I kept coming back until, I realized that the reason I keep coming back is because I like this.

then maybe – like the autumn – pray
that when the old all falls away
what follows falls abundantly.

Nice

[dadio]

Joel, you never disappoint. The craft and art here is abundant.


like the autumn – pray
that when the old all falls away
what follows falls abundantly.
( Very good expression)

[hester_prynne]

Lovely, in absolutes!
H

[Sue Littleton]

Damn, I wish I could do the aab bbc ccd eeb etc. thing. Beyond my powers. Just have to trudge along in free verse and poetic prose. Well constructed and a beautiful poem as well, Joel. Hugs, Sue♥♥

[joel]

Thanks to you all...

and Sue,

If I could write in freedom, down I'd lay my chains...
but, as the king of medom, my law-of-land remains:
and as its judge, my sentence convicts my words to rot
in rhymes until repentence returns to freedoms sought.