no place

[creativesoul]

she was looking off into no place really when he asked her"do you still love me?" she said yes but was thinking of her husband, the father of her children in africa. a voice told her that being a queen was not that bad after all
what about the problems you had with him, another voice said
her eyes were dead
she had a mind that would not stop racing
she dug around in her backpack for her medicine
the bottle had opened and they were loose on the bottom. she found one and downed it with gevalia coffee, the nightmare coffee company.he was modeling the uniform they gave him for work."how do i look honey?" he said
'great "she said
still smouldering from the night before the fire would not catch
the cat was scratching the drawer and trying to get in
what happened to me she thought
why am i awake at this ungodly hour and how did i end up so behind in school?
where have I been? it was if she hd been behind the looking glass watching everyone else like an old cat.she tried calling her mother, father, and found no memory of kindness or community there.she was alone.
she thought of various drug combinations.the last time she had tried any of them they no longer worked
that was six years ago
in the name of love she had fallen prey to a sadness that she could not shake off
how did all those old people stay together for 50 years ?
she could barely handle 8 months
she tried fitting entire friendships into 15 minute increments
at book stores
coffee bars with her friends
oh she had come to hate the smell of coffee
it meant something
but she could no longer remeber what
she gave notice at her coffee bitch job
and planned her escape from reality
people talked to her
even loved her
she had become numb
he did not really notice
the advertisements to hawaii seemed to be getting cheaper and cheaper
maybe she could camp on the beach
listen to the ocean
quietly she looked back at the past there had been beauty, love and happiness
there had been children
there had been alot of errors
she could never fix
she looked the ring he gave her she felt sick
he did not know how to deal with this
somehow she was broken
he did not know that love could be difficult
she looked siliently into no place
her mind told her that the way he loved her
th way he talked to her
would make it all right
he had stopped talking to her
she had grown lonely
bitter
she smiled when she saw his face
but her heart was broken

[stilltrucking]

strong story
glad I read it.
keep on writing creative soul