the problem with heaven

Post your poetry, any style.
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mnaz
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the problem with heaven

Post by mnaz » September 1st, 2004, 4:35 pm

I met a high priest one time,
standing on his lofty, radioactive fortress
on the big bang's highest, holiest hot rock,
well short of grazing the nearest star,
yet taller than all the other fortresses
built on everyman's sinking sand

He peered down at me when he could
our big bang father, who art in heaven,
who loves the light years of hurtling chaos,
redemption soaked in blood and spent diesel,
smashed into holy verse, read from a turret
I could barely make him out, he was so high

Other times he sat across from me,
looking toward the sky, offering brochures,
telling of radioactive heaven's black hole gravity,
kneeling to be filled with eternal rapture,
clearly outlined in the chosen verses,
as in truth rotating like a planet

hester_prynne

Brilliant!

Post by hester_prynne » September 1st, 2004, 5:00 pm

"on the big bang's highest, holiest hot rock..."

I love this line,
and all the other ones in this too mnaz.
really stellar writing here.
no foolin!
made me take notice and lean forward
thanks you!
H

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Glorious Amok
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Post by Glorious Amok » September 1st, 2004, 9:44 pm

i am so high i can hear heaven
ah, but heaven
don't hear me...

gorgeously profound piece of writing, mnaz.
"YOUR way is your only way." - jack kerouac

Toerag
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Post by Toerag » September 2nd, 2004, 7:58 am

I used to have this reoccurring dream...that I was standing in line at the pearly gates, right behind Mother Teresea, and I hear God tell her: "You could have done more"...

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mnaz
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thanks

Post by mnaz » September 2nd, 2004, 6:34 pm

Thanks Hest and Glorious for your kind words. Much appreciated.
Something I read over on AC sparked me on this. It's also taken
from people I have met in real life. Religion confounds me, mostly.
And Toerag.... funny stuff. I'm going to steal that one....

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izeveryboyin
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Re: the problem with heaven

Post by izeveryboyin » September 7th, 2004, 5:50 pm

Light and catching--- made me think. Thanks for the read!
sometimes I just like to breathe.

www.technicolorfraud.blogspot.com

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abcrystcats
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Post by abcrystcats » September 7th, 2004, 11:32 pm

for some reason I missed this ... making up for it now, I have to tell you that I like the way you write. This is an excellent piece of work. I like your modernization of God. I dunno ... I just like it! do you have more where that came from? can you share???

Cat.

P.S. I read a lot of your earlier-in-the-year stuff on Litkicks, a while back. I still kick myself for not reading it before I "jumped" you in our recent debate. I am humbled now.

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sooZen
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Post by sooZen » September 9th, 2004, 10:53 pm

Mark, this is awsome. There are some really great lines here. Didn't you tell me once you were not a poet? Man, what a liar! :wink:

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~K
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Post by ~K » July 6th, 2006, 12:37 pm

the problem with heaven
is that no one has been there
lack of oxygen explains
more than the bible

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mnaz
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Post by mnaz » July 20th, 2006, 2:24 am

and yet...

a sixty-year-old man sat next to me at a church picnic and gave detailed descriptions of heaven, while I finished my baked beans. True story.

Just think of all the time lost to projected glory....

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~K
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Post by ~K » July 20th, 2006, 11:45 am

Ah-hah!

The problem with heaven is that
I
have never been there

projected glories
not withstanding

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » July 20th, 2006, 12:51 pm

I used to have this reoccurring dream...that I was standing in line at the pearly gates, right behind Mother Teresea, and I hear God tell her:
Sorry, you will need your social security card, original birth certificate, and two forms of picture id.

Mark for some reason I missed this one too. And I am glad I did. As I scrolled down the replies I dreaded seeing one of my mindless replies. Well here it is at last.

Heaven and hell are real enough for me. I saw heaven in my fridge this morning. Two home baked pies, cherry and peach. . And at this moment I am about to enter hell. Smoke them if you got em. LSMFT

No projections brother, here this moment it is all here. Projection is a snare and delusion of monkey brain religiosity.

I bow to your muse. You write music to my ears.

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Doreen Peri
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Post by Doreen Peri » July 20th, 2006, 1:09 pm

We recorded it. Listen here V

http://studioeight.tv/musicpost/mnaz/problemnaz.mp3

Thanks, Mark, for letting us play with this piece. I just LOVE this piece!

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Ann Bingham
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Post by Ann Bingham » July 21st, 2006, 8:35 am

"a high priest...standing on his lofty, radioactive fortress"

I am reminded of all the holier then thou finger shaking repent or be damned preachers. Where did it say in the bible that Jesus convinced with a shouting condescending voice, or "I know what you have done wrong and I plan to make an example of you." You get more bees with honey the smoke. (not a correct translation, but I think you get the point). I think the gentle teachers ways were forgotten when they hung him on the cross. Just thoughts I think this piece speaks volumes.

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lenny
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Re: thanks

Post by lenny » July 31st, 2006, 3:20 pm

mnaz wrote:Thanks Hest and Glorious for your kind words. Much appreciated.
Something I read over on AC sparked me on this. It's also taken
from people I have met in real life.
Religion confounds me, mostly.
##Religion...from the Latin root verb - to know. "Be still and 'know' that I am God." Recognize yourSelf. Stilling the senses stills the sensory flow, which stills the ever restless mind (chain of thoughts). What lies just behind the finely vibrating thoughts is the great vibrationless. Don't mistake the veil for the face.

Peace,

lenny


And Toerag.... funny stuff. I'm going to steal that one....
None of us ever gets anything we don't either need or deserve. Dry those liquid emotions and move on.

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