head
Posted: March 6th, 2008, 4:23 pm
wrapped around each other like the bow
he is the arrow
this morning i awake with a desire to just lay back down
I slept to listen to the answering machine, and i have an interview on monday- i want to work. I am still sending out applications and letters, resumes.i went to school it seems like forever, and I have to be broken like a wild horse, being taught about saddles and reins, and trying not to buck the system.
I want to help people. I am just not sure when or where. My headache is consistant with the medication they give me for it- which some people think is fun.It is fun the first time and after that you wonder if you can function, drive a car, wear high heels.i know that my pain is less than others, but to deny that I have any at all is what I am best at- i love to pretend. I am so tired of being unable to be honest with myself. friends have fallen away because they do not have brain injury and they are afraid. It is really ok- i get it. At each job I get I am gifted another piece of information, I feel like I am looking for the right fit.My head and my left ear hurt.I still do laundry, clean the kitchen- just barely crawling thru the day.But it is beautiful, I saw the sun come up. gasping at the coffee and smoke I just had to lay down and sweat and cough. I wonder if my dreams have already come true and that death is gaurding me, my life has the sense of beginnings middles and ends. i have lost sight of the chapter I am in. the words stream endlessly from my head, wiping away tears and stories that have little or no signifigance now, except to me.
owning a head is really fine but this oone came with no instructions, batteries not included.There is a part of me waiting in line at wal mart for batteries on sale. I cannot resist buy one get one free at safeway. gasoline is becoming an obsession. Hilary and Obama, for get Mcain . he is another burning bush. hush now sweet love of mine we are going to be fine just fine
he is the arrow
this morning i awake with a desire to just lay back down
I slept to listen to the answering machine, and i have an interview on monday- i want to work. I am still sending out applications and letters, resumes.i went to school it seems like forever, and I have to be broken like a wild horse, being taught about saddles and reins, and trying not to buck the system.
I want to help people. I am just not sure when or where. My headache is consistant with the medication they give me for it- which some people think is fun.It is fun the first time and after that you wonder if you can function, drive a car, wear high heels.i know that my pain is less than others, but to deny that I have any at all is what I am best at- i love to pretend. I am so tired of being unable to be honest with myself. friends have fallen away because they do not have brain injury and they are afraid. It is really ok- i get it. At each job I get I am gifted another piece of information, I feel like I am looking for the right fit.My head and my left ear hurt.I still do laundry, clean the kitchen- just barely crawling thru the day.But it is beautiful, I saw the sun come up. gasping at the coffee and smoke I just had to lay down and sweat and cough. I wonder if my dreams have already come true and that death is gaurding me, my life has the sense of beginnings middles and ends. i have lost sight of the chapter I am in. the words stream endlessly from my head, wiping away tears and stories that have little or no signifigance now, except to me.
owning a head is really fine but this oone came with no instructions, batteries not included.There is a part of me waiting in line at wal mart for batteries on sale. I cannot resist buy one get one free at safeway. gasoline is becoming an obsession. Hilary and Obama, for get Mcain . he is another burning bush. hush now sweet love of mine we are going to be fine just fine