domestic violience
Posted: January 14th, 2009, 2:17 am
perhaps some are more suited to be docile and willing to drop whatever interests them to jump when he calls you from another room, all in the name of love which somehow becomes slavery, I have been made into a hostage. I get a few cell phone calls every day where he tells me he loves me, I repeat the prase but the passion has gone ........ out of my voice, there have been too many arguements of which I am to blame. I had gotten so used to fault finding from him, brow beating, long nights in the world of television, he is a couch potatoe from way back, and all the women before me i feel compassion for, knowing that they fell for his manipulation just as I did. He used to be sexually interesting, fun even. he had a good sense of humor even. Something changed, was it me? Was it him? Was it us?
Between the shrink, the anti-depressants and the straterra I have done everything I could do to kill my idenity and feel some sort of intimacy and love.
The fact is he is just not interested and he is laughing in the next room at a very stupid television show which I refuse to watch, He thinks by laughing that I will become interested in what he is laughing about.--- i am all too familar with the demmands and expectations of this one. I am really pleased with my art classes, I am finally going to do what makes me happy,
the other night when he was sitting om me and slapping me with all his might I saw light, I couldnt call 911 because he broke my phone, I got a new one and a better one anyway,I went to the doctor the next day and she had my chest x-rayed and took a look at my back, my black eye and my bruised chin, and my scared and sad disposition. I went to a counslor that day as well and told her of my plan to escape this relationship. we agreed to see each other in another three weeks when my decisons were more concrete and my head less fogged in...today he is all hearts and flowers and he does not know what I know about the cycle of domestic violince.
I feel sorry for the women that have had this experience and do not have thier own income and they are trapped because they have no way to surrvive unless they depend on social services which is far from actual help.
I had to have one of my crowns glued back on as the slapping in the face jarred it loose. Each time I sought medical assistance the doctors pulled me aside and told me they were obligated to report the violience.I did not report it to the police, I* just went about the bussiness if taking care of myself, and in the process I got the care I needed.
I know I am not perfect, and if I could keep quiet and not bite the bait perhaps there would be no conflict?
Maybe if I resign and remove myself from this relationship I could recultivate my innerpeace.
In the meantime I am doing what I need to do for me, to surrvive and maintain my life as it is right now. love is over rated
Between the shrink, the anti-depressants and the straterra I have done everything I could do to kill my idenity and feel some sort of intimacy and love.
The fact is he is just not interested and he is laughing in the next room at a very stupid television show which I refuse to watch, He thinks by laughing that I will become interested in what he is laughing about.--- i am all too familar with the demmands and expectations of this one. I am really pleased with my art classes, I am finally going to do what makes me happy,
the other night when he was sitting om me and slapping me with all his might I saw light, I couldnt call 911 because he broke my phone, I got a new one and a better one anyway,I went to the doctor the next day and she had my chest x-rayed and took a look at my back, my black eye and my bruised chin, and my scared and sad disposition. I went to a counslor that day as well and told her of my plan to escape this relationship. we agreed to see each other in another three weeks when my decisons were more concrete and my head less fogged in...today he is all hearts and flowers and he does not know what I know about the cycle of domestic violince.
I feel sorry for the women that have had this experience and do not have thier own income and they are trapped because they have no way to surrvive unless they depend on social services which is far from actual help.
I had to have one of my crowns glued back on as the slapping in the face jarred it loose. Each time I sought medical assistance the doctors pulled me aside and told me they were obligated to report the violience.I did not report it to the police, I* just went about the bussiness if taking care of myself, and in the process I got the care I needed.
I know I am not perfect, and if I could keep quiet and not bite the bait perhaps there would be no conflict?
Maybe if I resign and remove myself from this relationship I could recultivate my innerpeace.
In the meantime I am doing what I need to do for me, to surrvive and maintain my life as it is right now. love is over rated