Citation
Posted: February 3rd, 2009, 4:45 pm
Citation
Alright. I was cruising the cosmos in my Arcturian intergalactic jalopy. Somewhere in the local group of galaxies, I was too plastered to remember, a Betalgeusian cop pulled me over. She said I was doing ten times the speed of light in a warp two zone. I countered that this is impossible, since Einstein's theory of relativity says faster than light travel is against the laws of physics. This cop seemed to know her stuff. She said that the latest unified field theory allows for transwarp speeds equivocating faster than light. In fact I could theoretically transport anywhere in the universe in the blink of an eye. Well I was clearly out of my league in quantum mechanics and string theory as well.
However, I desperately didn't want my intergalactic license revoked. I had a big party to make at a nearby quasar. She noted that I appeared somewhat inebriated as well. I said I had sleep deprivation having traveled a million light years without a nap. She gave me a ticket and a reprimand that if she ever caught me in her quadrant faster than light she'd slap on the cuffs and haul me off to the detention center. She said the women guards didn't fool around and could be quite rough. She probably never suspected how this idea strangely aroused me. I set off duly chastised.
Alright. I was cruising the cosmos in my Arcturian intergalactic jalopy. Somewhere in the local group of galaxies, I was too plastered to remember, a Betalgeusian cop pulled me over. She said I was doing ten times the speed of light in a warp two zone. I countered that this is impossible, since Einstein's theory of relativity says faster than light travel is against the laws of physics. This cop seemed to know her stuff. She said that the latest unified field theory allows for transwarp speeds equivocating faster than light. In fact I could theoretically transport anywhere in the universe in the blink of an eye. Well I was clearly out of my league in quantum mechanics and string theory as well.
However, I desperately didn't want my intergalactic license revoked. I had a big party to make at a nearby quasar. She noted that I appeared somewhat inebriated as well. I said I had sleep deprivation having traveled a million light years without a nap. She gave me a ticket and a reprimand that if she ever caught me in her quadrant faster than light she'd slap on the cuffs and haul me off to the detention center. She said the women guards didn't fool around and could be quite rough. She probably never suspected how this idea strangely aroused me. I set off duly chastised.