(lrod rarely wears a tie unless he wants to do his Rodney Dangerfield impression)
you know that you are getting old when
you start to lose in Jeopardy
when you lose at Wheel of Fortune
get yourself checked for oldtimer's disease
(straightens tie)
you know things are getting bad when
a plane crash in the Hudson is good news
(straightens tie)
you know it's getting bad
when you don't have enough spit to lick your foodstamps
(straightens tie)
you know times are tough
when you resort to Rodney Dangerfield jokes
(straightens tie....fools with collar)
I Don't Get No Respect
- Lightning Rod
- Posts: 5211
- Joined: August 15th, 2004, 6:57 pm
- Location: between my ears
- Contact:
Nice. Yeah that Hudson River plane thing... bizzare. All-around strange times in general.
It's rough out there..
One time when I was bumming around Vegas, I was all set to catch one of his shows-- but he cancelled. And now he's gone, as I recall. Too bad.
...A few Dangerfield lines:
"A girl phoned me the other day and said... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home"
"I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people".
"I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face".
"I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap".
"I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it".
"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet".
"I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out".
"I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get".
"My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet".
and so on...
It's rough out there..
One time when I was bumming around Vegas, I was all set to catch one of his shows-- but he cancelled. And now he's gone, as I recall. Too bad.
...A few Dangerfield lines:
"A girl phoned me the other day and said... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home"
"I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people".
"I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face".
"I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap".
"I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it".
"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet".
"I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out".
"I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get".
"My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet".
and so on...
- Lightning Rod
- Posts: 5211
- Joined: August 15th, 2004, 6:57 pm
- Location: between my ears
- Contact:
here is the real thing
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