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disaffected

Posted: April 4th, 2009, 12:59 pm
by Spooky Bunny
the night, edentulous, nescient to its
cosseting, cleansed me in its pit of
frothing mouth. I have the torso of a
sow under the guidance
of disaffection as well as motley other
unkind idolatries. so much for the fever from
this star, calcified, the skull’s abeyant mind.
my heart's a fountain in someone else’s
garden. truncate cherubim expulses blood
into the complicit pool; nose of
pinched cement feeds the carp of my lament.
i’ll never live the thousand strands of
my desires. leader of men, they come
blandish in my eye.
ground into the clay, a furrow God endures.
each melting ziggurat given
its own erection but in time,
rapacious darling flee from shaping me,
scatter in the sky
flakes of diamonds chipped away
children no longer star gaze from my
tent, but rake their fingers along my
words and see how much they can get.
this last legume blots my vacuity with
the sun and its alarm.
a holler in my shell, a torch
thrown down my throat; love was a
toilet paper and lighter fluid stick -
here’s the match too bored to pitch
to self-ignite this charcoal bed
and see the strobes of immolation,
transcend their rocking bliss.

Posted: April 4th, 2009, 2:02 pm
by Lightning Rod
I like this spook
nice use of language throughout

(note from experience: you are going to lose about 90% of your audience with the first four lines. The words don't grab the listener, They send the listener to the dictionary. It took me a while to learn that not everyone has my vocabulary.)

Posted: April 5th, 2009, 2:38 am
by hester_prynne
Refreshingly eloquent, but not without feeling, which is hard to do.
Dug it.
H

Posted: April 5th, 2009, 9:12 am
by stilltrucking
my heart's a fountain in someone else’s
garden.
kick ass poem