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((clink))

Posted: May 23rd, 2009, 8:37 pm
by mtmynd
dont tell me
again
ive heard it all
before
the accusations
suck
as if you know it
all
and the fact is you
dont
and neither do them
assholes
the ones with books
thick
with notes about stuff
crazy
how we all just believe
things
without considering origins
before
all this around us
shifts
plate tectonics
inevitable
destruction worldwide
someday
but until then
lets
enjoy whats left
right
after we salud
((clink))

Posted: May 24th, 2009, 8:38 am
by constantine
neat format - the line structure. you art heads are always visually stimulating. skol!

Posted: May 24th, 2009, 10:39 am
by mtmynd
tyvm, dino. i appreciate it. i enjoy exploring the word and it's relevance to the eye versus the ear.

Posted: May 24th, 2009, 4:55 pm
by Yejun
dont tell me
again
ive heard it all
before
the accusations
suck
as if you know it
all
and the fact is you
dont
and neither do them
assholes
the ones with books
thick
with notes about stuff
This is coherent, sentential stuff.

crazy
how we all just believe
things
without considering origins
Amazingly enough, there seems a slight, less direct shift here.
before
all this around us
shifts
plate tectonics
inevitable
destruction worldwide
someday
And this, I think, moves to the associative. If not, and reading it again just now it seems more of a syntax shift than of a Rorschach test.
but until then
lets
enjoy whats left
right
after we salud
And back again.

Nice match of form and content.

Posted: May 24th, 2009, 5:16 pm
by mtmynd
tyvm, yejun, for taking time to reply... it was good of you and i do appreciate it.