Page 1 of 1

Urbania

Posted: November 21st, 2009, 8:50 pm
by goldenmyst
Urbania

Banshee sirens wail
Cold cobalt clouds
Blot out the stars

Posted: November 23rd, 2009, 12:40 am
by hester_prynne
I like this Golden.
It's like a chiffon curtain blowing in the wind.
There's more to the story.
H 8)

Posted: November 23rd, 2009, 4:23 am
by saw
the unnatural elements of city-life condensed.....well done

Posted: November 23rd, 2009, 3:50 pm
by mnaz
cool, John. Reminds me of a poem I wrote last year,
"City life in January"

city life does not wear well,
grim concrete, filthy ice crust.
work in a gray box in a gray room
by a gray window, cars unceasing,
steel and glass to more of the same,
gray boxes, dull streets, shades of numb.
bankers trade them, at night they throw a switch.
yesterday tumbles through black sheen canyons,
steel thrusts unplugged, at the moon's mercy,
where cold, ashen light lacks horizon.

Posted: November 23rd, 2009, 4:29 pm
by constantine
a delightfully grim morsel.

Posted: November 23rd, 2009, 7:16 pm
by WIREMAN
this is something my mind can sink into.....love a poem that says so much and is short and sweet, i alwayze was a sucker for a banshee......

Posted: November 24th, 2009, 11:11 am
by goldenmyst
Hester, why thank you! Yes it would seem there is more implied to the story. :)

Saw, I like how you put that. Thanks for reading.

Mnaz, love your addition to this thread. Your poetic finesse accompanies my poem nicely.

Constantine, grim indeed. Thanks dude.

Wireman, those banshees rock. I'm honored by your reply.

John

Posted: November 24th, 2009, 11:12 pm
by mtmynd
good one, John... haiku-ish with a city punch.

Posted: November 27th, 2009, 1:02 pm
by goldenmyst
mtmynd, good summation. :)

John