Page 1 of 1

now you see it, now you don't

Posted: February 18th, 2013, 10:51 am
by saw
please be patient with me
i am not the same man
I was ten minutes ago
I am a man in rat-a-tat motion

dust avoids me,
the motes instinctively understand
they have no chance
to settle upon my eyelids

just as your perceptions of me form,
just as your internal gauges see
the red arrow stop
on your incremental black line

just as you get a reading ....
i am gone

Re: now you see it, now you don't

Posted: February 18th, 2013, 11:22 am
by joanne goshen
crisp words,liked the rat a tat,and the image of dust knowing not to settle on the eyelids

Re: now you see it, now you don't

Posted: February 18th, 2013, 12:27 pm
by constantine
i too scoff at that incremental black line - it's very presumptive - i dare say. nice economy (the poem - not the economy)

Re: now you see it, now you don't

Posted: February 18th, 2013, 2:13 pm
by justwalt
patience, he says,
like time was something that
I keep in my back pocket...

hello... hello?

my patience is...

oh, whatever.

Re: now you see it, now you don't

Posted: March 15th, 2013, 3:33 pm
by dadio
I have this problem with money. Nonetheless, this one one heck of a fine poem and gets to grips well.

Re: now you see it, now you don't

Posted: March 15th, 2013, 7:39 pm
by stilltrucking
That way Big Brother can't get a reading on you. 8)

One had the impression that there was dust in the creases of her face

Re: now you see it, now you don't

Posted: March 16th, 2013, 11:36 am
by theirishsea
I like this. Strong poetry here.

Re: now you see it, now you don't

Posted: March 16th, 2013, 9:34 pm
by saw
thanx, one and all....always appreciate the feedback