Moon talk (poetic prose)

[Doreen Peri]

I followed the moon to the horizon as it dipped below the sky, my eyes making contact with its orb, absorbing its roundness, it's luminescence, reminiscent of the way i portrayed myself when, I, too, thought I was something rather important to view, but really, no, I never thought that, I've just been sitting here fat in the crack of the in-between connections of mountains and sky, freedom and i, perpetual cries from ravens and seagulls cawing: raw, my disappearance below the surface but hell, let me tell you, has nothing on this earthly habitat and that, dear friends, is a rat-i-tat BANG of real coming to you from the feel of a gunfire peel, one round after another into a crowd so unfortunate to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and as clear as day as that's cliche, I'll offer you my rhyme as I tell myself to stay the hell INSIDE as I protect my skin, my aura, my heart, my feet. I don't want to bother you or offer any fatherly advice, but please think twice about where you go and when because this is my pen and I'm writing my blood and if you're not careful, you could be in it. The moon is just a satellite where we can imagine us being free in it. I'd like to go there. Would you dare to come? Let's go venture to the moon while we're still young. No wait! It's YOU that's young, not me! I'm just traveling on the periphery of an orbit. If I'm not against it, I'm for it. And on that note, which happens to be in a minor key, I would like you to accompany me so we can see whatever there is to see about and around us before our time is up. As is mine, right now. And so I bow to you and all you do and bid you adieu and hope our orbits pass by each other again. The moon is a diadem, a crowned jewel, a tool to guide us. But I'm so lost that if I found myself, I wouldn't know where I was anyway.

I can't hear for the fear of the near explosions! My head is in erosion. Earth quaked, the shake off of of a break in the surface, emergency without purpose? What do you DO when you find you cannot tolerate the pounding, resounding heartpumps? Just dump it all and sleep? Keep the pique of the insidious continuance at bay by swaying time to delay the dilemma? This must be the stem of an aorta pump. I jump at the chance to dance with it, but I'm no lackey, no crack up, just a lump in the throat without being able to swallow, my heart hollow from the losses, the tosses of my veracity stolen like thieves steal, masks over heads, eyes bugged out like bees, and I am on my knees begging for solace, a relief, a remedy, a future perhaps promised but I don't believe for one minute that it can happen which is the major problem, friends. And so I'll end this with the plea again for love and peace, the abandonment of arms, the release of compassion, and I will fashion myself wearing high-heeled promises with short-dressed remarks, stark the being of the being who I am. And I am. Yes, I am. Not much, not worthy, but only me, and can't you see that opiates would be nice? They would relieve this massive headache. Maybe I'll admit myself to the hospital. Goodnight. Keep the light on. Dawn comes soon after the moon sets.

[WIREMAN]

Love the continuous flow.....good to see your writing....i'm sure this is new, right?.... Sometimes I feel like hiding out from all the insanity that abounds, then something beautiful happens, whether it be an unexpected hello from a stranger or the moon hanging over the freeway in the morning....we've been through and seen a whole helluva lot in our lifetimes my friend......peace and love to u Doreen.

[Doreen Peri]

Yeah, it's new. I wrote it the other night. Maybe my muse has come back. I'm not sure yet. Thanks, Mark!

I lost another friend. Karen. Her husband died of cancer then 2 days after his funeral she went to sleep and never woke up. She was only 52. I miss her like crazy. She literally died of Broken Heart Syndrome. It's a real thing. Too much stress. Her heart gave out. My heart hurts. She left two kids 22 and 19. A few days later, her mother died. The kids lost both their parents and their grandmother within a few weeks. It's tragically sad.

We've definitely been through a lot, for sure. This is the 8th person I knew who died this year. I guess you can't get to our age without having your friends die.

I'll always love her. She was one of the most creative writers I knew, plus she was so funny, witty, intelligent and beautiful.

I'm not sure what this piece has to do with it but it all came pouring out of my pen when I was sitting in my bedroom mourning.

Thanks again for reading. I think it might work as a spoken word piece. I'm not sure. Sounds like it, in my head. I'm not really sure what it means, exactly but it was my heart bleeding.

[revolutionrabbit]

Doreen, a year and a half ago about my wife of 35 years died she was only 57, six months later my mother died.The two women that were the longest in my life.Not a day goes by that I think if only I could just have laid down an died on that worst day of my life. I keep on telling myself this is why I write.What it means to be a poet, that you take in the mysteries of life and death. My wife was my best friend, in fact I really see her as the only real friend that I ever had.She was the sun and the moon to me. I never want to set foot in a hospital again.Thanks for the moonlight. I have learned a lot in the years that i have been posting my poetry on the internet, it's the only thing that I have left. Your words really show your inner spirit, lady.

[WIREMAN]

So true revolution rabbit. I too lost my wife Carole Jean right before Christmas 2009 after a long battle with breast cancer, then my Mom was not far behind. Still am reeling nearly 4 years later. It's easier said than done, but life must go on. There is so little precious time left, me at 60 now. I keep performing my poetry, making wire sculptures and working as an iron worker, the things that have kept me going all of my adult life. Acceptance is the key. My only hope is that when i'm gone those that care for me will remember and respect this amd move forward with the rest of their lives.

[revolutionrabbit]

Thanks for sharing that Wireman.Your wife looked like a wonderful person.Peace & Love.

[judih]

along the path, expression is the only outlet that helps heal

doreen, thanks for letting your words flow and offering a space for craig and mark to share. such loss is perhaps made more bearable by releasing the words, hearing others respond.
comfort in any form is warming. may comfort be felt.

[saw]

the emotion is locomotive doreen
and beyond the significance of this rolling stream of power and tears
I would add, that I know you could read this really well
and I'm sure that the audience would dig it
and we all here know, we have to write
and this is how we heal....and it is a community
so please feel my electronic love

and my urging, for you to keep writing
let it all go into pieces of prose, poetry
whatever, this is the reason you started the site
you grasped the power of strung together words
many of us here are growing into that state of life
that has become demanding if not for the aches and pains,
the losses of loved ones, so keep on writing doreen
.......and all ya'all

[WIREMAN]

Love this community. Yes Steve many if us are in them twilight years, the time when there is but so much good healthy time left in our lives. That's the reality plain and simple. Write it out....perform them words.....speak the message of "NOW!" Good writers it is what we have to share along with an immense wellspring of life experiences. This wired man B hangin' out and hangin' on still rockin' the wire and rebar like I been doing since I was 19 years old. Gonna keep it going as long as I physically can, feeling blessed.

[Doreen Peri]

I'm sorry it took me so long to get back to this and to reply to the replies.

Rabbit ... Years ago I knew your real name but I've forgotten now. I'm sorry. I'm getting older. It will probably come to me when I least expect it. Your post brought tears to my eyes. My sincere sympathies to you for the loss of both your wife and mother in such close proximity. I can't imagine what that would be like. Thanks for reading what I wrote and for connecting with the story I relayed. Sending you positive thoughts and love.

Mark.... losing Carole Jean was very hard on you, I know. She was a lovely and talented lady. My condolences. I know it never really gets easier, does it? I know you miss her. I'm so sorry she had to go. Thanks for posting the photos and sharing your memories.

Judih .... thanks for reading... I rarely write any more, so when my heart pours out, it's pouring the rain from my eyes. I'm glad to still have Studio8 available for others to post. I wish I were here more often. Maybe that will change some time soon and I'll feel more up to posting and being part of the community.

Steve ... Thanks for reading and for your poetic reply. I hope we can meet up some day. We live so close but Baltimore is so far for me with the condition of my car and finances. I'd love to meet you one day again, though. Life is short, yanno? Very short. I'm finding this out as my friends keep passing on. I don't understand death. I don't accept it yet. I'm trying to learn. All I know is life is short.

[Doreen Peri]

I just heard there's a storm headed toward the Gulf Coast. My friend lived in New Orleans. She survived Katrina.

This storm is named....... KAREN ..... That's her name... my friend who just left us. Sigh... she's coming back to cry for her family....

Amazing.

[saw]

So right Doreen, my car is decent....I will message you about making a trip to Sterling in the near future for lunch....many of my meditations these days tell me to act...to be spontaneous....not to wait around for things to happen...."life is what happens while your busy making other plans."....take care

[Doreen Peri]

Rabbit = CRAIG! .... How could I forget. I'm so sorry, Craig, for my aging memory loss. And again, my sincere condolences to you for the losses! <3 (that's a heart)

.....

Steve.... maybe we can crash one of Wireman's readings one night. *smile* That'd be fun. You take care, too!

.....

And wishing everyone who reads this good health and joyful times. Count your blessings and live each day to the fullest. Everything is temporary. Everything but love.

[the mingo]

[revolutionrabbit]

Thanks for remembering my name, Doreen.
I remember a lot about your distinctive writing.
I always liked your strong wit and at the same time
your easy going irony even so your feelings remain
mysterious in the moonlight of your reflection.