trying for iron

[the mingo]

( Author's note - no meaning intended, exercise in sound only, vowel rhyming - )

the spiral is widest at violence
i'm biting & blinded
real bible crisis
the buyer cycles quite eyeless
tightens the writer at wisest

kiss the pilot
private & rightful
island girl sings of the tribal
scientist thinks of the bridal
twice priceless diamond
trying for iron

[revolutionR]

reminds me of cut up technique championed by Burroughs.

[the mingo]

in a way it is - have become much interested in sound itself - vowels being the sound units of all our words - opens up possibilities of "poems" becoming true "abstracts" as in paintings - paintings of sound - i admit this idea may have excited me overly much but this is the 21st century & it may prove to be the cusp past which we cannot carry on from the past & we will be forced to venture anew like it or not - new understandings of ourselves & our existence require new forms to meet new needs - the explosion of asemic writing in the previous 20 years hints at this - those we call the "Beats" touched on this whether they realized it or not - they may have opened the door but none of them stepped very far through it neither for very long those that did - the reason the piece here may put you in mind of Burroughs is because i was working from word lists where words were grouped according to their vowel sounds - Burroughs was the only true pioneer among the Beats & maybe Kerouac in places though he never spoke of it - the rest of them used the language they had for their own purposes - none of them were busy with creating a new language but only new approaches to what was available at the time - computers also shine light on this - the language they use to communicate has not been made to be clever - that new language actually accomplishes things - and the world is moved - Burroughs said it himself - "cut the present & the future leaks out" - not bad for an ol' catamite junky - but discovering and creating new language was beyond even him - as usual it is the poets who will colonize the future - they are the only ones who can - whew! got on a roll didn't i ?

[WIREMAN]

try some Patchen...he was a gem hiding out in palo alto when the rest of the beats were just beginning to shout....or Howl....

[revolutionR]

I haven't really thought of using vowel sounds as such, But over the years being on the internet
my writing has taken on leaps and bounds, I always was attracted to the most experimental writers, I still read the writers and poets that I was reading 40 some years ago, but I look around for new writers and poets. I still don't see much that surpasses my first influences. There was a poet in the bay area by the name of David Moe, who died a few years ago, who
was totally able to just ram words together in long chains of sound and action, he comes to mind. Another French poet Claude Pelieu, also died in 2002, he had that long chains of rammed together style, I haven't read him in years. His books are not cheap. I still read Antonin Artaud now and then. Andrei Cordrescu a famous writer/poet Whom I met back in 75' at a poetry reading, and later partied with he has a very unique voice, he has a web site called Exquisite Corpse. But I agree that always attempting to break through, and experimental is key.

[the mingo]

try some Patchen...he was a gem hiding out in palo alto

Wireman - I think i have heard this name before but have never read anything by him before -
i will check him out tonight - Thx

[the mingo]

But I agree that always attempting to break through, and experimental is key.

Thx RR - we reach 100% on that - i've been writing "poems" since i was 11 or 12 now am in my 60's and retired - just gotten tired of what i'm doing - couple of months ago it came to me that i'm looking for a whole different "something" altogether - thx for the considered reply - i know the state i'm in and there is never any telling what will trigger something or how many triggers there will be - it certainly may prove i will have to look back to go forward - this david moe is not a name i've heard before - 'net accessible ? i'll find out - i'll track him down tonight - you think of anyone more appreciate you letting me know -

[Doreen Peri]

Oh well. Pet peeve of mine. I don't like being ignored. *shrug* I deleted my posts.

[the mingo]

wait what are you talking about? I didn't ignore you - i was answering the posts here in the order they came in - your's was the final one and i was working on a reply to you when you must have posted - i was not ignoring you and now i don't have your post anymore

[Doreen Peri]

Sorry. I'm overly sensitive, I guess. I thought you skipped my post entirely. It's my mind that's the problem. I'm disabled. Sorry.

[the mingo]

aw to hell with this

[the mingo]

damn we crossed again - don't move!

[Doreen Peri]

What I said is the tool you're using is called assonance ... it's been around for a long time, since the beginning of poetry, whenever that was. And then I posted a definition of assonance. That's all.

Sorry, again. It's me, not you.

[the mingo]

i was checking out assonance - what you said about it - actually read your def you sent and thought about it - ... it is close to what i've been thinking - i am more into using sound itself to paint - one of the things i'm thinking about - whew!

it's ok doreen - just know i was not ignoring you - not even close

[Doreen Peri]

OK.. it's what you called "vowel rhyming".. that's what assonance is.

Assonance is nothing new. It's been around for a very long time as a tool of the craft of poetry. That's all I was saying. It's terrific that you've discovered it and you're now exploring it and I think you did a great job using assonance in this poem.

Again, I apologize for my sensitivities. I react wrongly sometimes. It's my anxiety ... I'm unstable.

This is why i often use humor because it's the only thing (other than going to the gym) that works to keep me sane... .... I should have used humor this time. Sorry, I don't have any jokes right now, but i'll think of one soon.