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Mood 9999999

Posted: March 6th, 2023, 9:18 am
by creativesoul
I awake many times in a night
This is when tobacco is my friend

My dreams pull at me like salt water taffy
There is stardust in my bed


The moment when the playlist is redundant
And all those songs seem ridiculous
Until Bonnie riatt and i feel the same
And guilty
Yeah it’s been 37 years since I was a bad girl
But those voices never go away
My mind thinks because I’m so close to peru a big fat rail of cocaine would do the trick

But I know I have never had one rail
One drink
One pill
There was never enough shit to quench my little inner whore

So I just have to tell that bitch to shut the fuck up
I know other people that are wired for feeling nothing
So I am a little nutty
As I am just the d 2 9 alleles gene
Programed to find pleasure where there is none

Yet she speaks to me
Tells me she can fix me up
Yeah
I’m used to her now
I used to take orders from her
No more
But when the mood strikes for real
Nothing can stop a real drug addict
Not even the police
I know I get one reprieve every day
Just for today I will not sabotage myself

Re: Mood 9999999

Posted: March 7th, 2023, 9:41 am
by saw
my son was an addict for 20 years
so I know about this first hand, and wow
what a ride it was
so glad to see him finally clean for one year
the brilliant honesty, the appreciation
he has a girlfriend that loves him
and he knows he's never going to that other place
ever again
and he is full of love....and giving

Re: Mood 9999999

Posted: March 8th, 2023, 2:32 am
by mnaz
stardust in my bed...

poet ...

Re: Mood 9999999

Posted: March 12th, 2023, 6:17 pm
by creativesoul
Yeah recovery is pretty good

Re: Mood 9999999

Posted: March 15th, 2023, 12:34 pm
by creativesoul
The voices of the past are too funny
I’m pretty sure that they are comedians
They make suggestions like “ you could buy a winery in Chile and drink yourself to death”
Fortunately
I don’t listen to them much but I’ll tell ya
There is way more to life than wine
You would never guess seeing them at at a party that the next morning is going to be rough
I will not drink without knowing that an opiate awaits the headache
It’s been 37 years
I think I’ll stick with these jokers