Happens every time I put it on

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hester_prynne

Happens every time I put it on

Post by hester_prynne » July 2nd, 2005, 2:40 pm

Underneath my clothes,
I'm wearing a sexy
black velvet dress.
It's sleeveless,
of course,
because my arms,
have always,
been beautiful.

It fits me tight,
in all the right
places.
So comfortable,
invisible,
I don't even
wear a bra
with it.

When you
see me in it,
you'll just
kiss me
all over.
You won't be able
to stop
yourself.

Happens
every
time
I put it on.

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iblieve
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Post by iblieve » July 5th, 2005, 7:10 pm

Damn what a beautiful picture you paint with words, makes me wish I could see that fucking dress, lol. "C"
[img]http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a97/iblieve/9e35dd63.gif[/img]
iblieve
DARC Poet's Society.

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joel
Posts: 1877
Joined: June 24th, 2005, 8:31 am
Location: Hampton Roads, Virginia

Re: Happens every time I put it on

Post by joel » July 5th, 2005, 7:33 pm

hester prynne wrote:because my arms,
have always,
been beautiful.
Great poem! I really like the section quoted above. I might suggest dropping the comma after "have always,/been beautiful" because it seemed to interupt the flow. Nit-picky, but only a suggestion I have.
"Every genuinely religious person is a heretic, and therefore a revolutionary" -- GBShaw

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