Studio8 - Uniting the Arts

blow my nose
butterflies
no fun
feeling like this

their wings beat
inside my head
tickle my nose
when i exhale

no matter how many tissues
they keep collecting
and make fun of me
with their whimsical shadows
blasted butterfly wings

here's a tissue
for your head
now be a good dolphin
and go to bed
till it passes
I'll keep the butterflies at bay

Cute little ditty
you must feel real shitty
I hate colds

I cry easily--it's embarrassing. Over dumb stuff too. I shouldn't even listen to country stations on the radio when I'm on the highway...some of the songs have me in tears just because I anticipate where they're going. Empathy overtakes me easily--but I don't often cry for myself.

Last Tuesday I got some honest feedback from good friends. Not all the time, they said, but sometimes I come off pretty arrogantly. Critique of what I do doesn't hurt...but I heard this as critique of who I am.

Historically, I've understood myself on the oppressed and dominated side of bullying. I've hated myself for the flaws I accept from others; how could I hear I have done the same and not cry? How can I have ever left someone I love feeling like a peon and not wrap myself in the remose of my own grave?

How can I struggle with my own level of esteem and self-loathing and lord myself over someone else?

Gratitude for enlightenment did not stop the butterflies' wing-beats, collected in my crying in light mockery of my shame.

Thanks for your words. Thanks for your voice.

Thanks Buttercup. And joel don't know if good or bad? No matter just trying to make light of how I feel. Just something silly.

Besides aren't dolphins suppose to be whimsical, as well as intelligent. Thanks for the response.



love lots