Melanin
Posted: September 7th, 2006, 8:57 pm
Melanin
I really do want this like everyone else. WIthout make-up... without fear. Without my cell phone or my DVD player. Just me. I'm brown with imperfections from every childhood ailment I've ever had. I have scars from working around ovens and knives. I have scars from being alive. I am anemic, I have scoliosis and a head cold. I am not wearing any lip gloss. I have taken the weave out of my hair. There is nothing but me sitting here in a black and white stiped hoody and flats. With Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire in my star-spangled bag. And I've never felt more alive. It hurts. And it smells like brimstone. And you people keep laughing at me. Perhaps I should just give all this up and post a rant about incandescent lamps or large vibrating eggs. I am so brown. I am so very brown. There is hair on my body in places you can't see and places you can. I am not afraid of it anymore. I can't spend the rest of my life running from the distortion in the mirror. The terror that emerges from my bed every morning for no reason at all and for every reason. I love being brown... really, I do. It's being alive that always does me in.
--k
I really do want this like everyone else. WIthout make-up... without fear. Without my cell phone or my DVD player. Just me. I'm brown with imperfections from every childhood ailment I've ever had. I have scars from working around ovens and knives. I have scars from being alive. I am anemic, I have scoliosis and a head cold. I am not wearing any lip gloss. I have taken the weave out of my hair. There is nothing but me sitting here in a black and white stiped hoody and flats. With Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire in my star-spangled bag. And I've never felt more alive. It hurts. And it smells like brimstone. And you people keep laughing at me. Perhaps I should just give all this up and post a rant about incandescent lamps or large vibrating eggs. I am so brown. I am so very brown. There is hair on my body in places you can't see and places you can. I am not afraid of it anymore. I can't spend the rest of my life running from the distortion in the mirror. The terror that emerges from my bed every morning for no reason at all and for every reason. I love being brown... really, I do. It's being alive that always does me in.
--k