Page 1 of 1

Top Ten Reasons God might not exist.

Posted: May 12th, 2007, 9:52 am
by mnaz
10. Doubt.
9. See no. 10.
8. See number nine, number nine, number...
7. Strategic forklifts of infrastructure verses.
6. Atheists throb like bad boys strapped to a weapon.
5. Weapons throb like bad boys strapped to God.
4. God may in fact be a real estate agent.
3. Stand up sit down fite fite fite.
2. Slush fund skullduggery.
1. I might owe him money.

Posted: May 12th, 2007, 1:34 pm
by mnaz
ps.

Sorry about that "him" thing. Used my pronoun dartboard, that's all...

Top Ten Reasons God Might Exist

Posted: May 12th, 2007, 1:35 pm
by Jenni Mansfield Peal
10. Doubt
9. Belief in doubt
8. The number 8
7. Deep pits of posterity
6. Fundamentalists lose God fans fearlessly
5. Fearless God fans frame fundamentalists finally
4. Real estate agents grub for godliness
3. Go ------ God!
2. Slush
1. I owe him money

Pronouns are metaphors

Posted: May 12th, 2007, 1:36 pm
by Jenni Mansfield Peal
Pronouns are metaphors, just like God

Posted: May 12th, 2007, 10:12 pm
by joel
10. Doubt
9. Belief in doubt
8. Infinite arguments in support of doubt
7. Infinite atheist arguments against a divine god
6. Weapons--period. Divine thunderbolts and mundane hatreds.
5. Borders--period. No god/ess is worth his/her pants who can be boxed.
4. Estate sales; estate taxes; commercial tithes
3. crusader jihad/jihadist crusades
2. Ugliness--period.
1. I owe him/her--period.

Posted: May 12th, 2007, 11:08 pm
by Totenkopf
Top 10 reasons why Gott does not exist, or if HE does exist He is equivalent to ...........El Diablo...................and should be put on trial.

10.
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1 (see above)

(and Clara Petaci. NO loving Gott would allow Clara Petaci)

Posted: May 12th, 2007, 11:28 pm
by Lightning Rod
10. He doubts my existence
9. only the good die young
8. my credit card was declined
7. he won't burn my bush
6. the saddam and gomorrah affair
5. Superbowl XXX
4, no, I meant NASCAR
3. He hasn't called me lately or emailed me, not even a fucking text message written in stone.
2. Not enough thunderbolts
1. He won't make friends with Nietzche

Posted: May 13th, 2007, 1:39 am
by hester_prynne
10. I've never seen him.
9. He might be a she.
8. I know people alot like him, and they are just people.
7. Churches make money.
6. Some of his disciples are pedophiles.
5. He looks different in alot of pictures.
4. From what I've read, he seems more like a tree than a man.
3. The santa claus thing.
2. The Easter bunny crap.
1. Because he's over there behind that curtain, talking through a loudspeaker...

Posted: May 13th, 2007, 3:10 am
by e_dog
Been trying to figure out
why or how "Doubt" could be a reason God don't exist.
Maybe like Tinkerbell he needs your belief
to survive. That's faith.
In fairytales.

"God is an American." -- David Bowie
"God-Money." -- Trent Reznor
"In God We Trust." -- American Money
QED.

Posted: May 13th, 2007, 9:40 am
by Arcadia
maybe
warning: the concept of God can lead to unjustice, saddism, violence, pain, buoreacry, manipulation and sexism.

The friday before last friday I saw an obra de teatro based in "Crónicas de Satán" (I don´t remember the author of the text), this thread reminds of that.

Posted: May 13th, 2007, 12:00 pm
by Axanderdeath
of course god is real man. he, and it is defently a he, shit us out one day after eating a fat taco.

Posted: May 13th, 2007, 4:54 pm
by mnaz
e_dog wrote:Been trying to figure out
why or how "Doubt" could be a reason God don't exist.

Maybe like Tinkerbell he needs your belief
to survive. That's faith.
In fairytales.
Asked and answered. God don't hold all the cards here. Where would we be without God? (And vice versa)?

Posted: May 13th, 2007, 5:54 pm
by Arcadia
here´s a folleto of the obra!: it´s memorias not crónicas.
Cacho Palma´s "Memorias de Satán" based in the Alain Didier Weill´s text with the same title.

Posted: May 14th, 2007, 12:02 am
by e_dog
Top Ten Reason God Might Not Exist (from David Letterman)

10. Syphilis.
9. Drug overdose.
8. God died from a broken heart when Eve left Him for Adam.
7. Heart attack from eating too much pork.
6. God died from loneliness being the sole supreme being.
5. God died trying to dis/prove the scholastics who wondered if His omnipotence meant He could do anything including things that would contradict His omnipotence.
4. What?
3. Suicide ... God killed Himself because you didn't believe in Him. Are you happy?
2. God died for our sins but because our sins were so great, He drowned in them without resurrection or life-vest.
1. "God" ain't nothin' but "dog" spelled backwards. (Works in all major languages. And by "major languages" I of course mean only English, naturally.)


[/i]

Posted: May 14th, 2007, 12:45 am
by mnaz
I like that list better.

Especially no. 4 & 5...