After 9/11/2009

[one of those jerks]

I suppose things are different in NYC since 9/11/2001, but in Virginia all I noticed after the fact was a lot of paranoia, xenophobia and two wars that will never end. I have no warm fuzzy feeling about it.

But I remember July 16, 1969. The day I saw the earth from the moon and I could not see any borders, it all looked like holy land.

And I don't know jack shit about G d. .

"Tiger got to hunt, bird got to fly; Man got to sit and wonder, 'Why, why, why?' Tiger got to sleep, bird got to land; Man got to tell himself he understand."

Things Kurt Vonnegut Said Better Than Anyone Else Ever Has Or Will

[jimboloco]

we got cubans who don't want their relatives to go home to visit families
we got long gray bearded nam vets with pow patches on their black leather vests
we got ww2 bomber groups still having reunions
we got civil war reinactions
we got reinactions of the seminole wars

40 years ago i was flying jets
now i am witnessing american culture advance thru fits and starts
and glad to be a little part of it

i never heard god speak to me
but i did hear the still small voice of a child
and i hold that child now inside
pregnant with life

amigoloco down on the south central texas prairie
watching the cactus bloom
and th armadillos sweat
wondering about the wonder of it all
as any sane homo sapiens should
why why why

[still.trucking]

Starry night, a night mare
I always liked this picture a lot. I think you called it "Welcome to the Revolution.



any moron can fly an airplane

Forty five, no forty six years ago I was in College Park Maryland, tossing and turning in bed at night, unable to sleep till I imagined laying there with a shot gun tucked up under my chin, my finger on the trigger. Then I would drift off to sleep.

If I ever get the money I am going to buy myself a Tibetan prayer wheel. Something like a wind chime. Getting ready to throw my life in the wind again. All I ask is one thing. Somebody please talk me out of it.



My Friends are the best therapy I can get
thanks for being a cyber pal.

Zen Holy War?

[stilltrucking]

<center>And now there are none: Harry Patch dies </center>
<center>

"Give your leaders each a gun and then let them fight it out themselves
I've seen devils coming up from the ground
I've seen hell upon this earth"
Harry Patch

</center>


Yes world war two and korea, so many veterans.

I have my little civilian chicken shit childhood PTSD from a cellar with the putrid smell of dead rats and maggots. NOthing to compare with the horrors you have to deal with. You have done good jim, you have seen more death than anyone here. I am glad I met you. I wish I was half the man you are. You are a healer, I know of no higher calling, except for teacher.

I am just trying to make something of the shambles of my life. If for no other reason than to hold myself up as a bad example to the young. Mostly I am just marking time, waiting for the end. I used to worry about whether a good death will find me. Now I am prepared to go at anytime in any way. Not looking for redemption or enlightenment. I accept myself as I am.
I no longer wish for happiness, I only wish to be aware.
My motorcycle is my therapist Jim.


Harry Patch died. They say he never talked about the war until he was a hundred years old.

As Harry himself said
"Irrespective of the uniforms we wore, we were all victims".

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