Monodrama, the long and windy road

[mousey1]

Monodrama
the long and windy road

It's all hit and miss
this gig is
self massagery
opening up a vein
on a page
peeling a carrot
slicing it thin
beta carotene
good for the I in me

I think I'm sane
is that dangerous?
Sane
Insane
In sane
Think about it...
Living in sanity

inocuous
in ocuous

inebriated
in ebriated

in line
out of sync

Lubricated greasy wheel
can't squeak
can't squeal
can't make a peep
broken up in side
spinning spinning
turning turning
damaging your core

........................................................

[mousey1]

naked
I grope my mind
for useful thoughts

scrawl

[mousey1]

I like to get up early
proposition around
nose out the truth in myself
listen to the birds

some mornings I'm happy
find light in the clouds

some mornings I sit and scowl
What's with all the idealistic need?

those happy faces
we stick them endlessly on every thing
signifiers
pacifiers
emotifying smooth transitions
lifting the sagging pages of our discontent

.........................................................

[mousey1]

saucer face
lapping at the cream
never looking up
middle-aged moron
taker
rooter
indigo nightmare
scavenging pleasure for your own reward
obstacle maker
deal breaker
over anxious protector of your own pointless faith

die
mired in stupidity
smirking up at it's ignorant face

..........................................................

[mousey1]

mirror memories, the days
when I could look over my shoulder and smile
when time was filled with pointless tasks
paving imaginations way
tunnelling a zig zag line to fun
romper
puddle stomper
mud slider in the rain
every now and again
every once in awhile
I catch a glimpse of
that little girl lost
face in the crowd
mouth slightly ajar
fly trap look
Will she always be there
inside that stolid disposition
Will she peep out
when least expected
just to let me know
I'm still in there
...I wonder
That's it!
Mind-blessed wonder
That expression that says
Yes
I still care

.......................................................

[mousey1]

they write sad stories
and weave broken tales
about lives spiralling out of control
they lap greedily at some sense of normalcy
as if that's the way it's supposed to be
Normal?
Sounds like another way to spell secrecy
We all want it
To fit in
but no one really knows
what normal is
It's different for you
It's different for me
spin your tales
marvel in your lines
live dormant lives
wallowing in ink
flowing from page to page as it if makes
some difference
I can show you the soft edges of my heart
surround you
but distant silence overwhelms me
Proximity borders contentment
aloof, set apart
I can only wish for what never was
and write about it

I sign my name to love songs written on wind and time

tick tock out

..........................................................

[mousey1]

drink mixer
drunk on your own ideals
tossing back the exotic concoction
that slides down the slippery slope
like snails wet with rage
punching through days
making your way
every inch of time a struggle
fighter
mixing it up
truth and lies intertwined
wrapping your motives
around everyone else's lives
explosive magnet
pieces sticking to sky high visions
over the top ambitions

Settle down

SETTLE DOWN

settle down

enjoy the view

feel my arms encircling you
embracing the noise
calming the roar
of undeserved punishment

every time I edge in close
you quietly close the door

one day I'll step inside unnoticed
sit down beside you
serve those famous "tea and oranges"
that you'll pretend to hate

[stilltrucking]

I got no]words left for this one mousey1
you took them all away
I was in a trance while I was reading it

muchos grascias, saludos. bravo, and thanks

[mousey1]

Thanks for wading through
I reckon sometimes the water gets a bit murky
and I get a little...or alot...verbose!

[stilltrucking]

ok
verbosity
sure

Modesty is a virtue I suppose

carry on mousey1

[mousey1]

Modesty shmodesty

Here's to verbosity!

I must say I do like the word verbose! Was dying to use it in a sentence!

Here, I'll use it again...

Your verbosity is notorious.

Whenever I hang my mind out in the open air
to dry
to swing and sway
I gotta wrestle my modesty
out of the way

or I'd never post nuthin'!

[stilltrucking]

I almost drifted up through the ceiling when I was reading it, good thing I had my new sombrero on to hold me down.


They were very very nice

Speaking of verbose, it's funny how a word will keep coming to mind.
I learned a new word the other day I been trying to work ineluctable into my casual conversations ever since.
As in "The Ineluctable Modalities of the Visible"



that's all

[abstroint]

My inability to recall ever being an innocent being had caused me long ago to banish myself to an ocean of isolation. Your wordiness a raft of respite, thank you. I was about to let myself drown before I read what you were dropping. While up out of the waves I saw land and may be able to rest on the shores before I venture into the trees. I had found land before, and my excitement had caused me to run naked, screaming through the jungle. My release pissed off the islands inhabitants and I was banished again. This time under violent conditions, I fought, begged, tried to make deals, swore myself to silence, nothing worked. I was in the middle of getting some clothes on when they dragged me by my hair back to the ocean and held me in by spear point. I barely escaped death, landed on another island, kept my cool, and was allowed to stay. After my skin shaped back up and I didn’t look so much like a prune I thought it would be good to go for swim, clean myself up before they kicked me off too. I ought not go into the water alone because every time I do I go too deep, get caught in a current and the next thing I know I’m searching for dry land.

[stilltrucking]

Mousey1 where is trevor when we need him? He could tell me if it was as good as I thought it was.

My inability to recall ever being an innocent being had caused me long ago to banish myself to an ocean of isolation.

exactly

[mousey1]

Yes, the ports in storms, the life rafts, the reaching, outstretched gentle hands that you cannot see but sometimes feel, or cannot feel but sometimes see.

Innocence, lost innocence, found innocence.

Life is full of I don't knows, why'd I do that's, how come's, wherefore's and why's...those damned why's they're liable to get you every time. Why me lordy lordy why me...why you?

I have felt like I was drowning, glug glugging, over my head floundering.

I have felt semi dead, smothered in the words and actions of a zombie mindset. If you go with the flow of the dead sea, and if you don't struggle you can float endlessly, adrift, waterlogged, sunbaked need.

I have tried to make deals, swore myself to silence, kept my cool. Underneath though the water boils, roils, bubbles to the surface.

I want to hear the plaintive voice of reason, feel the softest touch, melt beneath the ecstasies of my own satisfied longings. Smell the fresh, clean, crisp air of my own desires fulfilled.

Wrap yourself up lightly in that which pleases and just breathe, just breathe.

I think the inner spirit must be beautiful to see.

Thank-you Abstroint for sharing your thoughts. I am pleased that my words could be a source of comfort and respite. More than once have I been moved, touched deeply by the words and thoughts, the beautiful minds of others as we float through these sometimes unbearable seas, or while feeling stranded on islands perhaps of our own making. So good to see a friendly face, an outstretched hand, appear from out of the turmoil.