The Science of Love--Narrow-Down Your Search for a Soul Mate

[roxybeast]

The Science of Love ... Narrow-Down Your Search for a Soul Mate

After watching 20/20, I copied & rearranged this from a couple of articles about the latest scientific studies on personality types and dating/attraction ... If you want to narrow-down your search for a soul-mate, read on ... maybe it'll work!

Personality Types

• Directors like, attract & work well with Negotiators & vice versa
• Explorers like, attract & work well with Explorers & vice-versa
• Builders like, attract & work well with Builders & vice-versa

Compiled from interviews with Helen Fisher about her most recent study ...

The Biology of Personality

After doing extensive research on the biological underpinnings of personality types, I have come to believe that each of us expresses a unique mix of four broad basic personality types. Moreover, our primary personality type steers us toward specific romantic partners. Our biological nature whispers constantly within us to influence who we love.

Explorers -- Dopamine. I began with this brain chemical because I had studied the activities of this powerful and ubiquitous neurotransmitter for several years. On impulse, I listed some of the personality traits I knew were associated with specific genes in the dopamine system: the propensity to seek novelty; the willingness to take risks; spontaneity; heightened energy; curiosity; creativity; optimism; enthusiasm; mental flexibility. I decided to call those men and women who expressed the traits associated with this biology Explorers. Patrick, I would come to realize, had a good deal of the Explorer in him. The Explorer, defined by high dopamine activity, is adventurous, novelty-seeking, creative. For the Explorer, it’s all about adventure. Explorers will frequently use the word adventure or adventurous to describe themselves.

Builders--Well, individuals who have inherited particular genes in the serotonin system tend to be calm, social, cautious but not fearful, persistent, loyal, fond of rules and facts and orderly. They are conventional, the guardians of tradition. And because these men and women are also skilled at building social networks and managing people in family, business and social situations, I dubbed those who had inherited this constellation of genetic traits Builders. The Builder, with high serotonin activity, is cautious, conventional, managerial. For the Builder, it’s all about family. Builders will frequently use the word family or family-oriented to describe themselves.

Directors--I had also studied testosterone. Although testosterone is often associated with males, I knew that both men and women are capable of expressing particularly strong activity in this neural system. Moreover, those who inherit this chemistry tend to be direct, decisive, focused, analytical, logical, tough- minded, exacting, emotionally contained and good at strategic thinking. They get to the point. Many are bold and competitive. They excel at figuring out machines, mathematical formulas or other rule- based systems. Many are good at understanding the structure of music, too. I named these people Directors. established that when a lot of testosterone washes over a fetus’ brain, it makes for a longer fourth finger than second finger. We found the people who scored as Directors had that longer fourth finger. The Director, pumped up with testosterone, is aggressive, single-minded, analytical. For the Director, it’s all about intelligence. Directors will frequently use the word intelligent or intelligence to describe themselves.

Negotiators--Last in my store of biological knowledge were some of the traits linked with estrogen. Women and men with a great deal of estrogen activity tend to see the big picture: they connect disparate facts to think contextually and holistically, expressing what I call web thinking. They are imaginative. They display superior verbal skills and excel at reading postures, gestures, facial expressions and tones of voice, known as executive social skills. They are also intuitive, sympathetic, nurturing, mentally flexible, agreeable, idealistic, altruistic and emotionally expressive. I christened the people of this broad biological type Negotiators. The Negotiator, more estrogen-influenced, is empathetic, idealistic, a big-picture thinker And when we ask, “Do you find the right word rapidly?” Directors say no and Negotiators say yes. There’s so much data connecting linguistic skills with estrogen. In the middle of the menstrual cycle, women find the right word even faster. The top word for the Negotiator is passion. Negotiators will frequently use the word passion or passionate to describe themselves.

Other chemical systems play a role in personality, of course. We may have as many as a hundred different kinds of neurotransmitters (smaller molecules) and some fifty types of peptides in the brain. But most keep the heart beating or orchestrate other basic functions. It is increasingly apparent that these four chemicals -- dopamine, serotonin, testosterone and estrogen -- play lead roles in producing aspects of personality.

Two others should be mentioned, though. Norepinephrine, a chemical closely related to dopamine, undoubtedly contributes to some of the Explorer's traits, especially their energy and impulsivity. And oxytocin -- a chemical synthesized, stored and triggered (in large part) by estrogen -- most likely plays a role in the Negotiator's compassion, nurturing, trust and intuition. In fact, families of chemicals produce the Explorer, Builder, Director and Negotiator. The specific activities of any one chemical are not as significant as the ratios and interactions among all of them and several other neural systems.

Nevertheless, only dopamine, serotonin, testosterone and estrogen have been directly associated with a wide range of personality traits. So variations in these four chemicals most likely form the foundation of these four basic styles of thinking and behaving.

Your personality is more than just your biology, of course. Personality is composed of two fundamentally different types of traits: those of character and those of temperament.

Your character traits stem from your experiences. Your childhood games; your parents' interests and values; how people in your community express love and hate; what relatives and friends regard as polite, dangerous or exciting; how they worship; what they sing; when they laugh; what they do to make a living and relax -- these and innumerable other cultural forces combine to build your unique set of character traits.

Psychologist Thomas Bouchard, director of the Minnesota Twin Study, unearthed so many stories like this one that in the 1980s he proposed that dozens of personality traits have a degree of heritability. Among those with the strongest genetic links, he reported, were traditionalism, the willingness to capitulate to authority, aggressiveness, the drive to lead and the appetite for attention. As he wrote in 1984, "Both the twin studies and the adoption studies converge on the surprising finding that common family environmental influences play only a minor role in the determination of personality."

In recent decades human behavior geneticists have added substantially to this list of traits linked with our DNA. More important to this book, scientists now know that groups of interacting genes influence behavior, even act together to create behavior syndromes. For example, if you have a biological appetite to seek novelty, you are also likely to be energetic, spontaneous, risk taking, curious and creative. If you are predisposed to be traditional instead, you are also likely to be loyal, cautious, respectful of authority and eager to make plans and follow schedules. We express constellations of related biological traits,1 creating what are commonly called personality types.2
Psychologists have determined that men and women tend to fall in love with individuals from the same ethnic and socioeconomic background; with those of a similar level of intelligence, education and physical attractiveness; with individuals holding similar religious, political and social values; and with those who have a similar sense of humor.

We also fall in love when the timing is right; and often with someone who lives or works nearby. Your childhood plays a huge role in your romantic choices, although no reliable patterns have ever been established. We tend to fall in love with someone who provides us with the things we need. And people often fall in love with those who are in love with them.

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In case you're curious, I'm definitely a Negotiator.

Peace & have fun,
Beth