Bandit Notions

[the mingo]

he might at that - ya never know with medicine folk - i think it's because of their penises - or if a woman than her vagina which is a penis cut open and turned inside out - medicine people got lots of stories and get lots of help - even if they manage to remain just next to normal they still get touched by the whole thing - i think sometimes their batteries were put in upside down so they run on a kind of invisible reverse current - probably have too with what they deal with - so he might giggle just like you have imagined.

[creativesoul]

yeah - definitely- i know only one real medicne preson- and he is honorable= his name is max defender-the one that i have to swat like a fly off my back and neck was staring at my neck yesterday- i guess- i have a nice neck- geez-
but i was lucky- i guess- i was there to be of service- bringing my friend with the recently repaired neck-so i made it thru- even though it is one of the most tired circles of people i have met= at the place where i came from- i need to believe that people want to get better- be whole- even if they are medicine people or think that they can do what they want because they have gifts= max doesnt do that- he is cool-
i love his family - with the exception of the evil rez queen that had make up on like a witch yesterday- must be getting ready for hallo s eve-and she is teaching her kids to be like her- which is posatively pathetic- but i ignore her- because she likes conflict and attention- neither of which i want in my life- so my other lil friend is having a baby- and she is a delight-due on dec 9th- and the funeral was beautiful- very spiritual- jubel- he was a rodeo man and really awesome- helped a lot of people he got sick playing with eagle feathers- that eagle took him home- he was a very beautiful soul- and he helped my lungs which are suffering these days-it is raining-i just noticed that sometime during the night- that-the leaves all fell off the trees outside my window- interestingly- i missed it- other then a few flurries of the leaves- i want to swim- i want to feel water around me- ill start with a shower- maybe put on a rain coat- go see the plants and trees and the winter state- love is only where i bring it-or look for it---

[creativesoul]

A group of women in a house far away from the usual machine- of life- the strength it took to share vulnerabilities could be a true test of your abilities-,- today- I had to get blueberries because my friend ate all of the blueberries- after a spanking great dinner- chicken and salad - spinach-- and mushrooms and a tomatoes I grew this past summer- it really has past-
Chicken- and a pomegranate Popsicle- yes- I was the kid that wanted everyone to color with me- jenny wanted to play army and had a plastic machine gun- mo liked playing house- yep- so - after driving all that way -for blueberries I have been persuaded to bake a cake with my wicked almond flour touch- went to le cordon blu- shall I take the plunge? Make the commitment- one year of studies in the pastry- .... April 4th------ it kind of looks like a contract- -forte entry grande- how am I going to run a farm and greenhouse and bake pastries? I'll find a way- or should I help ladies such as myself at the DV center- as in domestic violence ?
So I will never paint again- just kidding- it took me a year to fix the painting space in here- geez

[the mingo]

I love listening to people - there are no schools that teach that - listening, that is - so I've always been on my own with it - it could be taught & it should be - it's something that can be cultivated like your garden - we all have the talent for it but it's not done professionally - there is such a screaming need for it I think a professional listener could make more than enough coin to live comfortably in these uncomfortable times ( food-clothing-shelter-sundries-shits&giggles) you know, just like any other profession or even a regular job ... my uncle was a dreamtracker - he was a medicine person - one-third Mohawk - one third Oneida - half white - & one quarter trickster - he liked good food & good times & women - he did not dispense advice or tell people what to do to help themselves get better - folks brought their dreams to him - he let me watch him at it & in that he taught me what he was doing - it took a long time for me to realize that his medicine consisted of one thing - listening - in turn he taught folks to listen to their dreams - and to everything else. He has walked on from this world & his bones are held in the earth. I wonder sometimes what he is listening to these days.

I like listening to you. To the tales of your farm & dog & people around you & your empty dresses hanging in the sun.

[creativesoul]

the compliment is received well- and i too- am happy when i wake up and the bandit notion ........sometimes how you seem to be right here- with what i was dreaming or thinking-
in some ways it is like finding a baby at the doorstep- who turns out to be jesus or a wizards child=-
the soup- the carrots, the broth- the celery- the herbs-- it is in the soup i think- and i seem to always be hungry-
the day begins- the light stretches accross my window - and the room mate is awake- it is impossible to sleep in a house with a woman that is lonely or needy- the electricity in the house changes- and it becomes a war to continue sleeping with the roar of need passing thru the walls-i have tried to train her to not radiate or exude so much enthusasium at 5 in the morning but she cannot- and it feels like a war between awake and sleep for at least an hour before i wake up- forget it that the dude that used to love my friend that had her neck fixed is spiritually attacking me- that i wake up with bruises on my left arm after sleeping- is really not cool- that he throws these ties lines with little fish hooks in them which attach to my skin-i have red marks that blleed in various situations- it is like i am pulling buffalo skulls with my back- he has failed to recognize that she left him- because he is a slut- and sleeps with the women in the community so they will have a place on his altar- which having danced there- i can assure you- that the four years after the four years were a long walk back to fresh water and sanity- had they not dragged me to the tree in north dakota i might not be here- and i might have abandoned what i know to be the truth- i just did not know that i was strong- or that i could do any of these things- or that these gifts were anything- because i got the 'crazy' card pulled on me when someone didnt understand-what i saw or felt- or didnt want to admit they were throwing bad medicine- and i get the radar- and they cannot lie to me- but this dude with his long skinny body skanks around a funeral staring at my neck- i look behind me and cannot see him- and i see that he is afraid of me-me? ok - yeah sure- ME? that is kind of amusing really- i am so like the least important part of the whole totem pole- like seriously- and i have to fight this dude in the other world- ? all i was doing was helping a woman heal- which turns out to be- some kind of strange thing.- as maybe he didnt want her to heal- surely she is easier to manipulate while wearing metal nuts and bolts in her neck.
so what- what do i do? i put sweet smelling oil all over me- i put rubbing alcohol on my back- if i wasnt so tall- i could take a bath in salt water-but - as it stands- i just have to let it go- it isnt my problem- i have done what i was supposed to do-
how lovely that you are native- and that you are infact a listener- sometimes i hear my relations laughing proud walking with me- i love them- i guess they are proud of me- and i feel very blessed- it is unsual to have this many- maybe that is how i got the name 'manywalker' i was a bit confused when i got that name given to me - i thought that it meant i was supposed to help many people walk- then it switched up for me- i feel there are many walking with me- because i never would have made it without them- i cannot wait til the day when i get to thank them for everything they did for me- salute to your family! i enjoy your company- your writing and the insanely physic connection you seem to have - and how it stimulates my writing-makes me feel loved an appreciated- and touches me in a place that feels surprised and elated by other peple- what they think and feel and who they are- thank you for all that- megwich- mitakaye oyasin WADO- PEACE- THANK U

[the mingo]

not that much native - got to be a small part by now - comes thru my grandmother - and how she ended up with my grandfather I'll never know - I think he saw her waiting tables in a diner or breakfast house - so the stories I'm told - if it weren't for my uncle I would know nothing about it probably - actually think Coyote is more my relation than anyone - I do have some enjoyable times poking fun at folks and at myself ...
I wasn't always a listener - like I said it took me years to come to it and to realize the value of it - the medicine in it - I was told by a woman once that folks just need to be listened to - that it didn't mean they needed any more help than that - it's a mistake I make over & over -
that said - you're welcome - to you and all those who walk with you

[creativesoul]

It is worth the fermentation of the grapes for the wine. I don't drink but if I did it would be gavi do gavi shoclara do oro- and once while driving in a frenzy towards the ocean- I was a California girl living in Italy at 23-- I was merely a grape then- I am becoming a raisin - my wrinkles speak to me of my sons success as the smile wrinkles appear and disappear - the family tree has a gap between 1650 and 1895. I know I have native- as- a model they say I test out red- and have to paint me green for shoots- I still think that the buffalo I dragged thru a dream last night- says heavy praying- I have to be grateful- even if slightly confused looking-

[the mingo]

you dragged a buffalo thru a dream?! - where was ya going with it? Was the beast alive or was it a kill? Saw my uncle butcher a hog once - had never seen anything so primitive as that ever - I was but a boy - no, never seen something like that - an act that went back thousands & thousands of untold years into the past - my uncle sent us over bacon from that animal - WOW! - never knew what bacon was til the moment my teeth & taste buds got bathed in that meat - damn well spoiled me but good - I'm serious though, where was ya goin' with that buffalo?

[creativesoul]

My elder said I was praying.. That the buffalo is the greatest give away- at sun dance the men pull the skulls and the kids, sit on them- then the flesh offering which comes from - " breaking" I have some things I am quite sure I'm trying to settle on the other level- mezzanine level- my elevator got so slow- ten thousand seconds seemed like forever- but- I am still here- with a scar on my left shoulder that bleeds after the swim work out hot tub sauna- the beasts I have met have two legs... The four legged are far more honest- yes I filed a law suit against a greedy bitch- yes I am happy and the sun is out- I wanted to marry a bull rider- I thought he would understand the ride I'm on-

[the mingo]

jury duty today - tired - unrelaxable -

[creativesoul]

ya know i have walked a few felons around police stuff- it is kind of like the narcotics anynmous action kind of - introduces you to the whole criminal justice system on shalll we say a more personal level- when you sponcer someone and they have lost everything that was ever dear to them- children, husbands wives cars houses jobs-family- they have maybe a little flicker that if they stopped slamming dope or smoking meth that life might get better-one fellow i knew that just got three and a half years- had over 100 charges- most of them old- before the state of hawaii slapped him on the wrist- jury duty ? someone must be in a heap of trouble- because it is a crap shoot- if you have the right lawyer- and $ and if you do not have either- and a public pretender lawyer-
what gets to me is how 'child protective services' is involved and that people s children are going to be ripped out of their homes, cultures etc- to be swept into the criminal justice system themselves as a result of the chaos-and not everybody lives culture wise like white people- i do not aspire to live a nice clean white life- and i do not want what the tv says i should want- although TEMPTED every once in awhile by the great photography and the promise that i will be so happy if i had that=my back hurts- i walked a whole lot and prayed a whole lot- and i am not in story telling mode- i am tired--and i have been listening to people talk alot today- that makes me feel sometimes like an ear.my friend mo -mo is amazingly perceptive-she gets it- she doesnt dwell on the bull shit - she focuses on the bigger picture- like not the bump on the head- but where you got it from.. if ya know ya know what i mean-

[the mingo]

yeah - sorry didn't mention - it's a federal grand jury I'm on, not a trial jury - different fish in the kettle - I've been on it for over a year and just got extended another six months - sometimes it's exciting - but when it's boring it's really BORING - sometimes leaves me a bit dull afterwards - was gonna ride into town today but the rain says not happenin' - just got back from a walk in the woods with the hound - both of us soaked - now he's in front of the heater and it's coffee time for me -

[the mingo]

The Sun is Out ! Not a cloud anywhere - o but the wind is up I mean UP and moving - the bike is ready and me too - I'M OUTTA HERE >>>>>>>>>> !!!!!!!!!!!!

[creativesoul]

well- that is a story i was not expecting- wow- well- good job!
dirty job but someone gots to do it- wow

[the mingo]

This day brought rain. No surprise - that time of year. I journeyed south with my woman - she needed to go to the wizards and find out why her device was not working. It was her birthday. It was also the Mexican Day of the Dead. We took our dog with us. If we had not he would have greeted us with a howling upon our return. I always wonder about this. I saw a car abandoned in a field as we rode by. I wondered about that too. I find it erotic somehow. Just like I find the geese that string themselves out across the sky & call out to one another erotic. It has something to do with the passing strangeness of the world & for all our short time in it. It comes to our time & we ride. Then our ride & our time come to an end. The wizards told my woman what the problem was with her device. It was good news & she was happy. It was her birthday. It was also the Mexican Day of the Dead. We had no sugar skulls to offer the spirits of the ancestors. We ate a boiled dinner of beef & vegetables instead. The night came black as pitch. Just past midnight, long after my woman had gone to sleep, I thought about her pointing out to me all the empty osprey nests on our way upriver. I was surprised at how many there were.