Cancer lady, firstly

[SadLuckDame]

lol! I'm not Jack, nor do I wear his socks. But, a brother in the cosmos.
I do think Jack's my catfish fiend and magic man, though. It's all in my head.

Doreen, Alice Temper is my Alice who jumped. I've let her voice a few pieces so far. She's another dame in my head.

Everyone Knows an Alice

[SadLuckDame]

I like a good game of truth or dare.
Fleeting thought.

The primitive voice awakens
she's untamed, wildly bred
and I don't know how many more to house.

[Doreen Peri]

i like that poem! I've written quite a few poems with alice/carroll imagery... great imagery for poetry.

i knew you really weren't jack... i usually recognize his new names right away after he posts one or two times. (just for a second it did cross my mind for a minute.. LOL... but i knew you weren't jack)

some sites only let you have one name. I can understand why.... but he has fun with it so what's the harm? no deliberate deceit or anything

I see Alice Temper is also a name you've given to a character you created... then you put her in poems using wonderland alice imagery.

What do you mean she jumped?

[SadLuckDame]

Well, she jumped and braved the 'unknown'. Basically, she'd written a letter, gave the guy her good-bye sorrows and went separate into the tunnel. Her jump, was becoming separate.

I've only been kissed and not returned the favor, because Alice jumped. I couldn't stop her, I was amazed by her.
Something like that.

[SadLuckDame]

I'm not much like Anais in the fact that I'm completely truthful. I do not disguise my ugliness, I show it as if to challenge and defend it. The world will hear my truths from my mouth.

But, for those who look further, I've the more truth within my pretending, there lies the beating, bleating, bloody heart, the secrets, the core. There, there truth than truth. The life I live, the life I'd hide.
Anais, I think you'd done a brave deed in your lies and deceit, beautiful girl that you are.

[SadLuckDame]

Discovering human. My beat. My awareness. To be the human, too.
My father, whom I love, opened my eyes wide up. He the most human I've seen, besides my Grandmother, (his mother). He has a great height, broad shouldered and thick calloused hands. A worker, survivor, whole hearted.

He, too, lived in guilts. I follow suit. The weight of the world. When he returned from a hard days pay, my Mom would detail him on our behaviors. Mine never corrected, she'd share the frustrations of this. I knew she would; "When your father gets home!"
And, she was right.

The world, the difficult people, their general rudeness, their inconsiderateness and unkindness, their diseases and egos.
I could see it thick across his brow.

[SadLuckDame]

Thinking of the ex. How could he understand me?

I who gave a McD's coupon for a free cheeseburger to a gas station bum. The ex said, "What are you thinking? He's going to buy booze." I told him I gave a coupon, and if I'd given him money, then if he'd buy booze, well he must need a drink. He said, "I could of saved a buck on a cheeseburger."

I who stopped the car in the middle of a busy intersection, because a baby rabbit was hopping across it. He said, "You're going to get us killed!"

I who drove golf carts one summer, and had to stop every three minutes to pick a woolly bear caterpillar up off the track so my tires wouldn't squash it. He told me I was ridiculous.

What did I care what he thought of me, I cared about the haunting thoughts that'd stay with me had I not given a McD's coupon to a hungry dude, or drove right over a baby rabbit or squash traveling woolly bears.

I don't care if I've absurdities.

I don't get logic or rational sane thoughts. I only get me. I die with me.

[SadLuckDame]

Thinking of sisters.
They are intimate, intuitive. When I was young I was afraid of lightening storms. I still am. My sister who was indifferent to them, would let me sneak into her bed. She would draw on my back pictures or words, she usually drew a fantasy scene with unicorns, but I'd soon forget there was a storm outside for I wanted to know what picture was on my back.

[the mingo]

I don't care if I've absurdities.

I've been working my way through the posts here while eating burritos & washing them down with red wine. Ya gotta way Dame, ya gotta way.

[SadLuckDame]

Hey Mingo, I don't know what I write in here. Must be the red wine too. Thanks though, sincerely and sweetly.

[SadLuckDame]

Today must have been a bad case of the worms. Yesterdays tarot card of the day was, The Fool. Anyway, it's much easier setting up for the stage than it is to even attempt to make a restoration of my insanities. I do adapt better when crazy is all I need to work towards.

I recall going into this ancient bath house. It was particularly beautiful, I froze up walking into the tall, stainless steel contraptions, with their leathery straps and head trappings. All steel up against the magic porcelain and white washed walls. A good environment to relax without fully relaxing. Liked that. Really damn beautiful.

[SadLuckDame]

They say we all fight for something.
What's my fight, I ask into my hollows. And there's no answer, just image upon image of eyes, of burning. There's so much to fight for, I answer my hollows. I think of my Grandmother's eyes. Alzheimer's is an interesting disease. She'd suffered it long and hard. Back to the youngest childhood memories, they say, and I agree. Back to basics.
She was but alone in her pain, at three or four. There were no heros.

With her regression, those eyes of hers included mine own, as she beat upon his chest, killing him over and over. One could kill with the power of their soul that leaps from the focus of the eyes. I would of killed him for her.

~She shot at my Grandfather three times in the garden, throughout their marriage. Her last year, she'd hunted down that same gun from the attic. I had to help search for it. We laugh about that.

[stilltrucking]

I don't know much about buddhism, just want little I picked up here on studio eight from my cyber pals.

I got to find some links, stuff I posted about the self. Our neurotheologians just catching up with eastern philosophy.

I need to search out a couple of links.
Alzheimer's I no so little about it and think I know so much. Wanna be healer,
a bit from life against death
the protestent work ethic and intellectual work for the relief of man's estate.

I am reminded of Nietzsche's statement which I am going to mangle in my innimical style. Probably a million miles from how he meant it my cartoonish irony.
"God save us from the improvers of mankind"
I am hopeful that neuroscience and molecular biology are going to fix us. But dread sci fi novels of scientific dystopias. Kerouac even wrote a sci fi story "city City CITY" you probably knew that.

takes balls to write like that sister, ha
My rednecked buddy said of Bonnie Rait "She plays like a man!"


Wandering again.
be backs with my post links to a thread with cecil about neurotheology
My brain is in the wind , had something to do with these selves, or the Self, the Ego.
No idea altzheimers struck the young. Tragic.
Thinking about something mudshark said about lessons
I suppose one of the upsides to war is we learn so much about our brains from traumatic brain injuries. So much redundancy built into hour brains.

Yeah funny family stories, that is what makes our families so dear to us.

[SadLuckDame]

Alzheimer's is a strange one to figure out Trucker. I thought I knew enough about it, but it's like autism, different for each individual. Both my Nana and Grandmother had it, now my Grandfather does too. I know I will.

No idea altzheimers struck the young. Tragic.

Not that I know of.

It was after I found a picture of her, she looked about three in it. I thought she'd be tickled to see herself in it. But, instead it teleported her right before my eyes.
Yes, there is time travel, it exists. I don't know when I'd ever seen such scary monsters under a kid's bed in my life. I mean that.

[stilltrucking]

I mis read sorry. I am going to print it out and read it. I am ink miser, you are going to bankrupt me. I hardly print anything out.

Do you know the difference between a Scotsman and a canoe?

Yeah not to change the subject did you ever read the old calvin and hobbes comic strip. RE> the monsters. I wish it had been around when I was a kid. I miss opus too, he had his closet of anxieties.

I will post those links if I can find them. Not really related to alzheimer's though. Just thinking about the self, you refer to "the girls" some of my selves are not even human I think. I suppose that is what appeals to me about the philosophic aspect of a godless religion like Buddhism.

You want the links?