Influential heights

The confessions. It's all in my head. It's all in my head.

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » May 7th, 2010, 7:18 am

It was what happened when on the stairs.

Once when I was tripping out looking at a wall, I said, "there's a cement wall or brick or wood," etc. but, given a few more minutes looking and there was no more wall, there was no solid simple thing, it was all sorts of all sorts of so much detail and I began to look at all of what was in the wall to make it that sturdy solid thing; like spider webs, dirt grit and mildy mildew on top of splatter, lines over lines crossing lines mixed up with more lines that connected on horizontal lines then vertical.

I was on the stair and it was clay, but all the things staring out of it, lines--hand print lines and pushed in bits from palms, a foot print and shoulder print, broken shards, broken clips, happy moments and miserable, cold days to work, too hot, blue skies, a lot of a lot to keep me there looking in on it. I came away sadder.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » May 7th, 2010, 8:03 am

Because death is inevitable, than I have this over-whelming desire to live, at least I can do that for a time. When he encouraged life, I really haven't wanted to let him go. And why should I? Just because he's gone and has been, he's not entirely you know, gone I mean, unless I stop thinking he's around, which I don't know if I should just let go or not. That's where I've been laying, on the rock wall looking.

One thing I haven't tried yet is letting go
and I do wonder what happens if I do
I've been too afraid to try.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » May 7th, 2010, 8:09 am

It is been thirty years since my last time.
Well except for a mushroom omelet a few years ago. When I closed my eyes and the blue Hindu snake goddess danced for me.

I am still getting over it. And still noticing the subtle changes in me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C20mOQvd ... re=related

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Post by stilltrucking » June 6th, 2010, 8:08 am

I deleted Mr Cellophane because I know you have read it.
Yes it was juxtaposed to a reply from thejackofnightmares about his intent was to be transparent. I thought I might have been giving you an invidious honor.

I have heard that Sylvia Plath's husband has done a brilliant translation of Ovid. His name is Ted Hughes and I think of any man since Jesus Christ he must have learned more about having compassion for womankind.

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Post by stilltrucking » June 6th, 2010, 8:39 am

Hughes translated the Metamorphosis. Not The The Art of Love
Ovid was prolific. :oops:

Funny how little things have a life long influence on my life. Presidents and Kings, wars and panics come and go but a song I heard thirty or forty years ago still inspires me
Richard Farina Song
"Pack up all your sorrows"

Book III The Art of Love
The air shone purer round about me, and it seemed as though a burden had been lifted from my heart.




Like a load lifted off my heart.
I think that is what compassion means
I can't say that I have much compassion for Jesus Christ
Weird I know
I can feel compassion for the martyrs so I am not completely without pity.
Lord knows I got plenty of that, or used to have a lot of self pity.
Stopped mourning for myself
I worried about my brother going with me
He don't need no extra stress either.
But I feel so safe knowing he will be there.
I suppose that is how I feel about my own personal Jesus, Safe.

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jackofnightmares
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Post by jackofnightmares » June 6th, 2010, 9:02 am

Once when I was tripping out
One thing I haven't tried yet is letting go
and I do wonder what happens if I do
I've been too afraid to try.
a lot of a lot to keep me there looking in on it. I came away sadder.


I came away changed

Sadder but wiser

When I started to focus on sensory day I dragged my consciousness away to reading Nietzsche. I was too scared to let myself go. I felt I had to maintain control of my senses. I was too scared to hallucinate. Except for when silent woman and I made art to the love of a couple of hits of windowpane.

I don't miss anyone anymore
all my fleshy ghosts have gone to rest in peace.
but
I still miss my dog
Somenights I actaully call out to him in despair. He was such a noble and true four footed friend. a little self all six pounds of him
"Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect" Santayana The Idea of Christ in the Gospels

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jackofnightmares
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Post by jackofnightmares » June 6th, 2010, 9:13 am

"Because death is inevitable ..."

I find myself with a will to it, a will to nothing.

A will to create
to dissipate
copulate

Now that I have found a self
Life has gotten easier for me.

Keirkegaard
I been reading him when I have to the urge to defecate
I keep it in the bathroom vanity next to the crapper
"The sickness unto death"
"the despair of not having a self"
"Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect" Santayana The Idea of Christ in the Gospels

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » June 6th, 2010, 9:31 am

Sunday Stream "compassion

I hope that did not sound too personal, it is all women dame. All of you.

Sarah Palin is quite a challenge I must say.

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » June 6th, 2010, 10:58 am

I'd like it, Jack, to be some sort of part fictional/part persona/part truly, eccentric literary couple. No, they'd never met. Yes, they'd made love passionately. No, she'd not seen him and they were always lonesome. Yes, they'd flirt, then strip down in the pouring rain surrounded by desert sand. No, she was not his type, for she was too plain and cooked only sloppy joes and he was hungry for the actual buck, cut up and thrown over a campfire, extra whiskey on the side and beer roasted. No, she'd had a barely noticeable chest. Yes, they wrote poetry of one another. Yes, she'd somehow thought of him. No, he wished she'd go away...he had a wife tucked away in the deserts and she was barren. No, she wasn't...yes, it's a sad tale, but they might of been happy.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » June 6th, 2010, 11:06 am

I noticed that I noticed this one and then I noticed the fact of the time span between the LSD and the sex.

Kind of a rambling duet yes.

I likes it a lot

Can't do your reply justice now. I got to use the telephone
The world intrudes into my cave.

wonderful
just perfect dame

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » June 6th, 2010, 11:28 am

Oh lordy
not a wife tucked away
like Roger Chillingsworth
No not that

Bogey and Bacall
Hepburn and Tracey
Tinker Jack and Sylvia Plath
Hester Prynne and Martin Luther King Jr.
Anne Sexton and Red Sovine
plenty of roles

You think you are superstitious
I don't even want to imagine a wife tucked away

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » June 6th, 2010, 11:41 am

Ha! Well, it's what I imagine up, the beautiful and voluptuous trophy wife, who keeps him full on four course meals and tends to the children's talents.

Anyway, there's some story in it, but what is the story is actually the best part.

Anais nin and Henry Miller
Richard and Vida
Jack and Jill
Beatrice and Benedick

He said she might be a secretary in Little Rock, just paying the bills, though we like to picture her nude under a fully shining full moon, illuminated.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » June 6th, 2010, 12:07 pm

I picture him climbing a spiders web to
where the daring you girl with the strawberry hair
swings on her flying trapeeze

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » June 6th, 2010, 12:15 pm

That's very waterhouse and Diane Arbus
and a touch of strawberry fields forever.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » June 6th, 2010, 12:25 pm

When it comes to me, I'm very candid about my lack of anything especially fascinating or so truly memorable. I'm just simply me.

Maybees, that's bland, but then there's persona. Really liked reading about Ovid and Corrina, who was she, a real lady or fictional, and did he write fiction, all one needs to know about seduction, whilst he stayed lonely or was he truly a don juan and she his toy of a first wife, etc. liked it all.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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