Looking for a sturdy mattress

The confessions. It's all in my head. It's all in my head.

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » July 17th, 2010, 9:59 am

Here's a crazy thought I just want to say, your sister had looked androgyny to me, and I couldn't say whether was a he or her, but mostly cause it wasn't mattering to me if your sister was one or the other. But, what had mattered was your sister's length, like a true giant next to us. So what I'm thinking is I'm so mixed up. Some of me is able to transcend and some of me insists to be solid.

When I was conversing with her over my blue eyes affair, I'd went into this long breathy heated moment on how it all goes to memory anyway, that past is memory, that no matter if it's reality or pretend it still becomes the same thing; memory, "it all becomes memory", I kept saying and blah, blah. But, then I'd said to you that though I could make you appear from memory, I still prefer to live present over the past and over the future, I wanted to be present or something.

And your sister made me aware of how I am so mixed up, that somethings are mattering about how I want them to seem exactly, while other things are fine, like your sister being not one or the other, but that I was amazed of giant.

I'm gonna grab some coffee.
Do you sleep on your side or back or some other?
A new mattress.
I'm relieved you'll get your zzzs.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » July 22nd, 2010, 12:16 am

Funny you should ask about sleeping position. I recently started sleeping on my back after years of sleeping on my side. Long ago I used to sleep face down with one arm hanging down beside the bead. I used to read books that way, have them laying on the floor.

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » July 22nd, 2010, 6:33 am

I noticed I sleep better alone than with somebody, unless it's a thunderstorm outside or a Saturday night bar night and the streets are wild. I think I'm one of the most selfish females I've ever met.

I could picture that, the book on the floor, the hand on the last page and what dreams may lift the brow.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » July 22nd, 2010, 10:28 am

I am sure I could not fall asleep beside a woman again.

I would be to scared to sleep

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » July 22nd, 2010, 3:29 pm

deleted because of too much personal info sent it to you in PM
Last edited by stilltrucking on August 15th, 2010, 10:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » July 24th, 2010, 10:28 pm

Sweet, really enjoyed that, Jack.
Couldn't find it last night to reply, but anyway, it works the way we work it.

Found this for my mattress...

Honey and Clover

The magician showed me.

Then I just found the movie! I'm so thrilled by it, but wish I could find an English subtitle version. Anyway, I'm watching this version until I do.
Thought you might like with me, it's wonderful.

Honey and Clover the movie

If you happen on the English subtitle version, let me know.

And a very fun version with English sub, I'm watching too.
Love how they did this one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEuLb5uj_uc&NR=1
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » July 31st, 2010, 12:32 am

thejoysofsimplelife

Scroll to the eighth picture, really sweet. Makes a smile.
I like looking at these ferns embracing the large trees. They have nice photos there.

Another to like.
http://www.senorcafe.com/archives/000026.html
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » August 5th, 2010, 11:17 pm

`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » August 7th, 2010, 7:01 pm

Loved this picture in this blog...
Redbubble Of Ribbons and Bows
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » August 11th, 2010, 12:45 am

Why are men easier to sleep with than talk to.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » August 14th, 2010, 12:30 am

Why are women easier to talk with than to sleep with?
It...
Beats me dame. Everything about this world beats me.
Thanks for the videos and art. Very soothing for me.

I miss silent woman's pillow talk. When I was light and breezy and seemed to know just what to say. When I was her perfect lover before I became her perfect fool. We would lie there together and she would talk and talk unburden herself from the cares of her day. Talk of her children and work and husband and friends and I would listen and her voice would wind through me drawing me into her consciousness and then she would turn to me and smile.

I will never sleep beside another woman again. Not even a mail order bride. I am done with them and they are done with me. It has taken me a long time to realize that.

All I want to do is lighten up.

In the meantime I am more interested in women than ever before. And I am more disgusted with men then ever before. Listening to an interview by a man who wrote a book about LBJ. He said he was concerned with his courage. He got us into Vietnam because he was worried Barry Goldwater would think he was a whimp.

My nephew so concerned about what it is to be a man. He will be a father any day now.

Wrote in my sleep a couple of nights ago.

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » August 14th, 2010, 2:04 am

I know, I miss the stories to fall asleep on.
It's turtles all the way down, you said and it's scenes of what's in their eyes or what's on their shells. What I'd name my turtle.
I'm gonna keep him all male. I got a look of her holding on and he's swimming fast.

What were you writing, poetry and song or life,
do you want to get out of August, too?
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » August 15th, 2010, 9:36 pm

I love turtles, never forget a scene from my childhood of some men slaughtering a sea turtle, cutting its throat. How that poor turtle wound up in Baltimore's harbor I will never know.

That is a prevalent myth that the world is supported on the back of a turtle. I don't know if you know where the bit about turtles all the way down comes from

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turtles_all_the_way_down

I used to like this bit from Fire sign theater a lot. It does a good job of mocking scientists who have all the answers or at least all the guesses & surmises
Firesign Theater - “The Wall Of Science”
I Think We’re All Bozos On This Bus (1971)

Mystical Male Voice: [rumbling sounds] Before the beginning, there was this turtle. And the turtle was alone. And he looked around. And he saw his neighbor, which was his mother, and he lay down on top of his neighbor, [coyote howl] and behold, she bore him in tears, an oak tree, which grew all day, and then fell over, [coyote howl] like a bridge. And low, under the bridge there came a catfish, and he was very big, [coyote howls] and he was walking, [more howls] and he was the biggest he had seen. [starts fading] And so, with the firey balls of this fish, one of which is the sun, and the other, they called the moon… [sounds end]

Calm Male Narator: Yes, some uncomplicated peoples still believe this myth. But here in the technical vastness of The Future, we can guess that surely, the past was very different. [begins fading] We can surmise, for instance, that these two great balls… [sounds end]
http://www.happyatheistforum.com/viewto ... f=3&t=2595



August is the longest month of the year.

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I was going to scan the pages that i wrote about the dream after I waked up but have not got to it yet. Because>>>>(see deletion below)

Part of what of I wrote was about suicide.
Not just any suicide but virtual suicides like Jack Kerouac's
I was wondering whether I was projecting my thoughts onto others
Talk about unconscious
Talk about magic
Talk about projection
We live such dangerous lives my nephew and myself
My sister and my brother in law

Thinking about Yesterday
today.

"Yesterday all my troubles seemed so far away..."


I heard the wailing female voices
I knew I was going to hear
But he is still kicking still alive
So not as bad as I feared.

Do my fears manifest
As I dissipate them in text boxes?

I edited this bit out because it was a bummer but decided to put it back
Because I was in the intensive care unit with my nephew after his motor cycle accident. I been writing phone numbers on it, I need to blank the numbers out. Christians speak of the devil, but I believe it was Flip Wilson's Geraldine's devil who made him do it.
And I wondered if God's was punishing him for my father's sins.
What would I do without God? Who would I have to blame?
Last week I promised to take his girlfriend to mass at the Church in St. Hedwig but did not show up and it was the St. Hedwig volunteer fire dept who called about the accident. Who was St Hedwig I wonder
.

Sorry to dump all this personal shit on you. But I think about God a lot. I fear god plenty don't worry about that. That loving God that makes gentle people want to march off to wars.
I pray the best I can with my heretical faith. I read somewhere the only prayer that matters is gratitude.
I am grateful that he is going to be okay and hope some good will come of it.

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » August 15th, 2010, 10:29 pm

Nothing but turtles tonight
sorry for the long pedantic ramble

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SadLuckDame
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Post by SadLuckDame » August 15th, 2010, 10:33 pm

August being tragic in that longevity.
I just read a sad one by John Steinbeck, The Red Pony, it's a short one to be read in a day or two, but it haunts in the aching for something gone that's been close. One scene especially with an old man and an old horse, went out on their last ride, too.

Jack, I might not be good at giving advice or answering with much sense, but I am good being here, so if you need that, then I'm high demand. Mostly, I just want to rescue by way of going, "Let's meet down at the pay phones and you stand on one phone, back to back with mine. I've got one quarter, you better answer or we're walking home."

In other words, don't you know I'd miss you.
`Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,' Alice went on...`when I saw all the mischief you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling!
~Lewis Carroll

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