Imagining a moral dilema.

[BuddhistPunk]

Have you ever stood at a bus stop and run a series of events through your head about what you would do or say to the person stood next to you if they decided to annoy you. Well it happened to me yesterday. I was stood waiting for the bus when this big, huge, lump of an ould one came and stood next to me. She must have been 80 if she was a day and what she lacked in height she made up for in girth. She was easily as wide as she was tall and as we stood there in cold silence I started to imagine a conversation between us.

Ould one: Have I missed the bus?

Me: Well there is a 30% chance that you haven’t missed the bus. There is a 60% chance that you have and there is a 10% chance that you are at the wrong fucking stop.

You see three buses stop at this particular stop, the 37, 38 and 237. The 37 and 237 had passed but not the 38. Hence I imagined the 60% chance she had missed the bus and the 30% chance she had not. The 10% was based on her advancing years and the possibility of senility. Had she been more specific, I imagined, and enquired about a particular bus I would have been able to give her a more concise answer.

All this went through my head as we stood there in silence. I was feeling rather aggravated at the stupidity of the question she had never asked. I was getting annoyed at the old dear for something I imagined she might have said. I turned to face her and as I did she lifted her eyes to meet mine. Just then the 38 pulled up. As she stood there gazing up at me I sowed her with a head butt right on the bridge of her nose. I heard a crisp crack as her nose broke and she went down like a sack of shit.

So tell me. Was I wrong or is it okay to nut people who you imagine ask stupid questions?

[STUPID BOB]

She definitely deserves the head butt -- she didn't recognize the Buddah in the road and kill it.

[jimboloco]

i should have a practice like that!

Christmass Saturday at work I answered the phone....
"Cancer care, Jimbo, can I help you?"
"Yah, I need a big favor!"
"Who'se calling?"
"None of your damn business!"
"OK" I said and hung up.

I told Maria about this and said if he calls back I ain't talking.
He calls back and Maria tells him Jimbo is busy.
We debate about who it could be.
Maria says it sounds like an old lady.

Next day Dr. Bayless comes up to me smiling.
"I'm that none of your business guy!"
Wow! He's the neuro-surgeon.

I says, "Well, it's better to have tried to be funny and failed than not to have tried at all!"

There's one nut jobber who I like.