escapism
Posted: November 2nd, 2013, 7:25 pm
hiding in my room from the rez queens, from the excited voices of ceremony- everyone is grateful to be on this land- there is plenty of food- the medicine man and his wife are here and the ones thsat are trying real hard to be the most spiritual in the whole affair- the witch is served with papers- im drinking a synergy drink- im sick- i am tired- i feel like the feelings i have are not really even of any value- whether people like me or not is really not what counts here- i am really over it with skank energy =- the day begins with a girl that liked this man quite a bit and then another girl took his love away=so now she wants to tell me about whatever- i had to tell her- that seems like it would be between you two- and none of my business-
that is one of the reasons people do not like me- it is straight up- i tell it the way i see it- =oh i wish there was more i could do this time around- i cannot do anymore than i am doing- and why am i thinking i have to be so good in this lifetime= my gawd- go to the movies---
the same people come to ceremonies as five years ago-the same north western families= same ole stories- same ole song and dance- and i do not know how to take care of me in this crew- other than ceremony= there is no bond-- some of the people in my community i love very much- there is a general expectation that i am going to do for the group until i die-and maybe i will- but i am needing some love today-and i am wacthing tv hoping that i can see something that will help me out
that is one of the reasons people do not like me- it is straight up- i tell it the way i see it- =oh i wish there was more i could do this time around- i cannot do anymore than i am doing- and why am i thinking i have to be so good in this lifetime= my gawd- go to the movies---
the same people come to ceremonies as five years ago-the same north western families= same ole stories- same ole song and dance- and i do not know how to take care of me in this crew- other than ceremony= there is no bond-- some of the people in my community i love very much- there is a general expectation that i am going to do for the group until i die-and maybe i will- but i am needing some love today-and i am wacthing tv hoping that i can see something that will help me out