after g man

[creativesoul]

i had been with him for nine years- we raised my boys together- he had a big family- all in hawaii - KAUAI- and well- he just wouldnt stop doing smack- and i was the crazy bitch looking thru his car looking for his stash- by the time i found out- well- it was over anyways- i just kicked him to the curb- i had had it with the treatment centers and the crowd that came with his lil habit.he was back on kauai and i was in a house that didnt get done in oregon because he split ......
so i guess i tried to forget him. i went and found me a guy with hair down to his ass- he was a jeweler
he was kind of skuzzy - talking to older women all the time about jewelry= but he had some qualities that were a bit better and no wrose than others-
he really was the kind of guy that just did enough to 'get by' like he never had any money.
then after him was this guy that i hear is in prision now- a harley dude that was a little too excited about writing to my sister in australia.
he is also a shyster- and tried to take me for a dumb bitch- which i was not- so i didnt go into the buffalo business with him-
now- after the burnt out rock star leatherman tool dude- i am incapable of the kind of love i had when i married four men- but i never knew that part of me was all booked up with mr G even when i was with someone else-
so really-
now i am shell shocked- i met one kook on line and he turned out to be dangerous- -so now i think people are joking when they ask me out---
my son said' mom you had a hard time living with us....'
it is true =it is hard to wake up with people in the morning- always has been a challenge.
you were the best mr g= you loved me from the place that only a man that knows women can love-
those blue eyes- gads- when we went to thailand after the iniki hurricane on kauai - we had a blast! went and saw my sister in australia too-went horse back riding- i still laugh when i think how i asked you to get me some water= and ......................................... you said 'my ass hurts as much as yours ya know'
i warned you about the kapu on the big island- i warned you about going into that lil abandoned place with the crutches- you would not listen- you made a joke- as usual and played with the crutch- you traded your shoes with a guy on the train- we rode elephants.
you showed me things- like the monks all had ray bans in the airport.
i smile often- when i think of you- i fall into your arms- we laugh- we catch a wave-
like that time you said 'you caught some good waves, it was christmas day in hanalei- your sister mary lou was there-
i listen to you- when you warn me about things

interuption

[creativesoul]

you know things
and tonight
know that the father is doing what he does- so jealous and vain and self centered-
what he has always done- sought power over me
i had no idea..
you seemed to protect me from all that
i still believed in aloha with you
now i see the darth vader s
and just have to walk on by