Winter

[hester_prynne]

Awaiting footsteps
never to come,
old middle aged woman
stoops to shameless hussy,
a.k.a. the goddess within.
Not your mother,
or sister,
better your harlot
than that old adage.
You don't have to take it.
That this blade of grass with soul
requires more of you
than you have.
Dreams crumble ironic,
into freedom,
a.k.a. loneliness,
lived all the way through
to places,
older than the naked eye
can see.

[Artguy]

Mon payer c'est l'hiver....My country is the winter...as much as I complain...the crisp whiteness...the gray solemnity....the naked trees....the absence of birds....it's all home to me....

[atlanticqueen]

the whitened flesh of winter
burned raw in icy flames
of snow and ice and bitterness
longing
longing
longing
to see warm sun
feel warm sun
breathe warm sun
and run naked once again

[hester_prynne]

Words
regal
her
spirit,
send
mad
ghost
shivers,
to
her
slumbering,
cumbersome,
soul,
frail
under constant
cold,
wet,
grey,
bummershoots.
Paradox
on
overdrive,
all
that
jive,
just
to
fuckin
survive.

[stilltrucking]

winter
survival
slumbering souls

oh yes you have said the magic words
funny how I never felt so alive
as when I was foolishly risking death
on Monarch Pass
a wake up call to the soul
I suppose

[stilltrucking]

I have some images
like a deck of tarot cards
I shuffle through them
when sleep won't come
when I lay there overcome
by the evils of the day thereof
I deal myself a beautiful card

A sailboat cutting through the water
The sun rising out of the Atlantic
Sinking into the pacific
Moonlight on fields of amber grain
a stary night anchored off san simeon

But winter there is only one image
most of my winter's were hard
laying in the snow on Immirgant pass
trying to hang chains on 18 wheels
my hands numb
my body sweat freezing
oh yeah survival in winter
at ten thousand feet above sea level
it just ain't for sissies

but there is one from colorado that I keep as my ace in the whole

a pine forrest
the hour of the wolf
silent snow flakes
snow flakes I had never seen
large, huge feathery snow flakes falling
the light just before dusk
so still
everything so still
except for my truck
which was slowly
just ever so slowly
slidding back down the mountain
I would liked to have died there
and I almost did

[~K]

frost on all
the tarot Gods
adrift in
Kali's fog
centuries
throw down
their worth
in myth & verse
we recreate
our sorrows

[stilltrucking]

I think I must be mini stroking out
this brain of mind getting so quirky
orientation to person, place and time
comes and goes
I don't think I have ever been this old before
mad dash to the coast today
first time in years to walk a beach
spent most of the four hour car trip staring at my neck in the side view mirror

seeing that I am truly an old man
I have become unstuck in time
a couple days ago I could remember where this was
Virginia, California, Maryland, Cape Cod
and I awoke from a dream and could not remember my name.

it's interesting.
all my sorrows
all vanity

[hester_prynne]

ST, you are a fine writer. I loved reading your musings here, like I went there with you.

I know that Immigrant pass very well. Hard cold bitter in winter, beautiful in the other seasons.

Concrete animated with layers of human soul. Now that's feelin the road.....

Thank you for all of your contributions here Stilltrucker. I've come to rely on them....don't ever stop.....
H

[stilltrucking]

Kind words
even if I don't believe them hester
I am not a fine writer
Totenputz is write about my righting


and

I do a little leaning everday.

On you, on everybody here.

Where are you going? You are going into your beauty
And it is I who am opening all the doors as you pass
From room to room of your life till you walk to my grave.

Karl Shapiro
Collected Poems, 1940-1978

[stilltrucking]

no stopping it hester
and that is sad
becouse there is nothing more I would love to do than stop it.
I want to be free of it.

[stilltrucking]

you know I lost my temper the other day Hester
That is about as cold as it gets for me
I watched my baby sister walk out
and I felt such a loss
as if I would never see her again
I suppose that explains my mood when I wrote being free of this writting addiction of mine. Which is really a sublimation of my road addiction. I would be happy to explain that


I always immagined my concsience more like a Freudian super ego than a cute little bug
but
Jimmy Cricket is bummed out
is morphing into a Viking god of wrath
kicking my ass
I wanted to die
I wanted to be struck by lightning
So I decided it might be a good time to quit smoking cigarettes
I will quit this compulsive scribling soon enough
what's my hurry

Winter
my anger in winter
it is as cold as it gets
I was realy depressed when I replied to you above hester

it comes and goes with me
always best when I know the reason
usualy it is anger
strange how anger is such a hot emotion
erupting in anger like a volcano
yet at the same time it is such a cold feeling
colder than grief

just a go

[WIREMAN]

winter takes a hike today............

[stilltrucking]

hike in the spring
the seasons change
The sun so hot I nearly froze to death

April
Perfect
my first taste of fresh air in a year
I'm just waiting for a friend

I smoked my ash trays to the last but yesterday
bought one from a neighbor and bummed two from my little sister

I sat on a bench looking at back yards, and I could smell april, smelled like the ocean

but too chilly for a swim yet

I can't hike
the ankle bone connected to the knee bone the knee bone connected to the hip bone

I blew out my high dollor geezer sneekers with the roll bars.

I can manage about four blocks just enough walking so my foo dog don't explode.

good thing he is anal retentive.

I got take some library books back
I got a sudden case of fear of open places phobia
I can't deal with going out the door
but it costs me another two dollors every day I am later

but if I go out today
I will come home with a pack of Merit Ultra Lights.

Wheeling and dealing with God