perpetual jam!!!!!!!!!

[stilltrucking]

L7

?
reminds me of a night far away and long ago

the Dead End Bar, off of Thames St? on a narrow street running right down to a wharf, hard rocking women, singing a song about a Black Widow Spider, or maybe that was their band name, the drummer was so good even I could hear the beat. late seventies or maybe 1980, charm city, those black and white cobble stone streets, the rail road tracks, foggy, almost heaven.

why aint there french humor etc

I told Lightning Rod to shove his smith and wesson wear the sun don't shine, I am laughing now but I was blushing when I realized what he and the lazy bear were talking about.

[jimboloco]

well the player for white witch was a patient of myne

last tyme i saw him alert he was sitting in hiz chair outside he said

"when ya know ya got last daze ya see things different"

he was looking out side the hospital at the treez and th late afternoon lite an the erlie eve


amen he was tugged by hiz kid away into da bardo

dud(e)

[stilltrucking]

singlemelt's avatar in black and white, I don't know why I think of William S burroughs. I done know nothing about love,

"when ya know ya got last daze ya see things different"

I always wondered what rose saw in that mirror just before she passed on

I got up and covered it with a sheet, because that is what I remembered was a family tradition. I suppose I must getting close to the last gaze, because I think every sunrise is the brightest I have ever seen.

If you ever feel lonesome when you're down in San Antone
Beg, steal or borrow two nickels or dime to call me on the phone
And I'll meet you at Alamo Mission, where we can say our prayers
The Holy Ghost and the Virgin Mother will heal us as we kneel there
In the moonlight, in the midnight, in the moonlight, midnight, moonlight

If you ever feel sorrow for the deeds you have done
With no hope for tomorrow in the setting of the sun
And the ocean is howling for the things that might have been
And that last good morning sunrise will be the brightest you've ever seenIn the moonlight, in the midnight, in the moonlight, midnight, moonlight

[jimboloco]

the road the road it never ends over that hill is zion and behind the last one too, straight as an arrow through far left texas desert, twisting up north to Ruidoso and the inn of the mountain gods. Through the Mescalero Apache reservation, it was killing me but I loved it like a mother lover, for twenty tears and a million maybe two million miles it was the sweetest home I ever had

i got into arizona wild eyed tripped thru tuscon then madi it into phoenix beat hotel and got a job working at a lumberyard.
Christmas lunch at the lumberyard this Mescalaro Apache, Phil, says to me, "Hey, Jim, anybody tell you lately how good you are to work with?"
"No" I says. "I wouldn't think so!" He's laughing at me. Haw haw haw!

He went home to Riudoso up by Cloudcroft, an island in the sky.
New Mexico. Been there, man, as a kid, in the park where we were camping. Got called a gringo by one of the locals.

Got called gringo again by an old latino, he says to his wife on the phone, in spanish, "i got a gringo that talks spanish!"

it's karma, man.

[stilltrucking]

it's karma, man.

Trying to rest my eyes from the suburban sprawl down the street for the Taj Mahal.
If it was not for the trains going by like temple bells I think I would go insane. Living on motorcycle dreams, imagining how I would pack for a thirty day road trip. Following the gulf from texas to key west and up the eastern seabord to Virginia. But the desert draws me too, spent a lot of miles passing through gods country with the ball and chain of a truck, never got off the beaten path, I would like to see Moab again, soldier summit, Tonapah Joe and Alice I wonder if they are still kicking, doctor my eyes looking at a far horizon,,
Or best of all see Ilwaco again, follow the PCH up into washington, all those beach towns, San Simeon from a sea view, yeah the ocean, I suppose I will have to settle for Padre Island but dam that sounds good too, I may sound like I am full of self pity, but I still dream, get that kid on his feet and my baby sister can look out for herself for a while, after all she is married I am single.
pushing through the night head lights burning bright just going and going going until total exhaustion, like that point in love making when you are both past the point of no return, two lost in one, you cant get the feeling in five hundred miles there has to be thousands of miles to go, going better than getting there, st jack spoke to me of the road, never read him until I was in my thirties.

[jimboloco]

a good road trip, yeah.....you could also buy a greyhound bus pass and sleep it on the way....a 60 day bus pass.....

went from la to vancouver across canada to sou st marie down to detyroit stopped in at home then on to halifax and back down to dover new hampshire then walked and camped.
easy travelling.
a sixty day bus pass.

[knip]

jimbo...


what year? i had my summer of road-tripping in 1977...hitched from ottawa to alberta and back, with a 2-month stop in crow's nest pass at the place where alberta meets the US; the most southern of the canadian rocky mountain passes...a little town called blair sits right on the alberta-BC border, under the shadows of a mountainside where half of it fell away years ago (known as the blair slide)...most of the town was covered in rubble with many, many killed dead...when the dust settled and the rescuers could see they found a baby perched on top of a pile of rocks, virtually unmarked, crying like babies do

also saw an indian lose his hand trying to hop a train in regina...we had already hopped and were trying to stay warm in our sleeping bags on the stern of this grain car...my buddy sneezing and coughing because of his asthma...we were too scared to jump off and help the kid but the train was going too fast by the time our wits came back that we couldn't jump by then anyway...a couple hours down the track the CN police had stopped us and were grilling me on the beads around my ankle..."just an anket, sir"..."what is an anklet"..."well, it's like a bracelet, except it's on your ankle"..."what for"..."don't know..."...i'm guessing he thought we were too stupid to have anything to do with the kid's accident so he let us go...but it was a long, cold night

[jimboloco]

good trip for sure. you are talking about the little hole in the end of a car that is a natural cubbyhole, well, did not know what kind of cat that was.....did a quick trip in new hampshire in 1974 on that car, wrote a short blip on it on lit kicks, now want to retrieve it.

was riding the top at dusk an got bopped by the hanging rope
with knots fell backwards just as it went under a bridge, the bop knot did its job.

had another hike with an indian, beat up in portland, hiked and hitched to eureka, cal, to the hospital there, for stitches.

my cross canada bus trip was in 1974 also, how i got to new hampshire for the wrong-way train ride.

lucky i got all my marbles.
it that real politic?

are you still wearing an anklet? if so, i bet it's made of brass!
those poor coppers probably had a drink after that one.
indian fallen down gets up again. one hand less. was he still whole?

you wanted to help.
all the sad things to tell
sometimes mixed in with the glad

what is it that makes us complete?

oh yeah, in Halifax a kid on the bus invited me to his home, stayed overnight as a guest, nice family, but i was a sad lad, back in '74, a bum fallen, in store for more.

later, when i had stayed with another family
in Mississippi, working bums after Houston,
running from the law or from nothing, well,
I invited the Mississippi kid up to Detroit
with my family but
was told he was not welcome so
he went on back home
an I left too.

You know it never stops the clues that stir up
the ashes.

nice to be able to look back on it tho/
hi ho it's off to work i go!I am in charge today.

[jimboloco]

now the next morning reflection
images return
every day is growth
new dawn from yesterday's challenges and
I saw a frail old lady smile
with family all around
it made me glad

if i wore an anklet
it would be hemp
with brass beads
and would laugh
a hearty laugh
from the depths
so i will be looking
for a hemp anklet
brass buttons
and marbles.

[stilltrucking]

a 60 day bus pass.....every day is growth
new dawn from yesterday's challenges and
I saw a frail old lady smile

husserl's TV
if I could sit in the front row seat and watch that road coming at me I might wash the crud of the last eight years from my eyes, grounded out of service feeling weighs me down, a longing to to be moving, polymorhously perverse, rocking to the road,

whining when you should be wining and
dining em while you shoot your best right now shot.............

jamming keeps me slamming, keeps me feeling like I got a life, if only virtual, enough to sling me out of this orbit of morbidity.

[jimboloco]

crows nest valley
a vitrual life
up in morbid orbit
did you take out the jewess
a virtual deletion
her valley waits
your descent
the scent
of her valley
crash landing

grasses grow in the summer
why?
kids hike here
wear anklets of hemp and brass
dream sweet youth
then retire to adulthood
but remember.

[stilltrucking]

just what is the soul of a man
they say I never crawled, I just got up and walked one day
a kid needs to know that stuff about themselves
so now I remember those first few scary steps, and bam down on my ass again, after all these years I still toddle along but my ass has got boney,
and I wonder how can I get my student driver squared away, I been thinking I have to work on his mother but now I see that ain't the problem
got to start with him
with myself
doing a bull elephant walk

these half man half boys, myself included,
I remember him as a happy kid,
________________________________________
up against the wall red necked mothrs

I got to walk that lonesome valley so does he, but it is hard to survive without a ticket to drive.

me i dont want a pickle

no bus ain't going to work I dont think, got to be naked, feel the breeze, a motorcylce a tent a sleeping bag, a city boy has got to learn to survive.

[jimboloco]

Well I have been asking Zlatco about that dilemma.
The lost period when ya don't know you have value.....as a young person and
Z-man says he latched onto his university program until he found himsellf walking on level ground.
Me it took years of trudging.

I don't want to roll scared without home or direction like I did before,
but could do it.
A road trip tho is a great idear
fear not, what ya got to lose?

Still learning to walk man.
Comes from within and is realised somehow.
Nurturance and friendship helps.

[stilltrucking]

took a couple steps today

Walking again, thought I had a grip on it but I lost my way again.
Let go off the melodrama again, clarity of the way of a pilgrim for a brief moment today, just a glimpse, we shatll see how far I get this time before I fall on my ass again

thinking about a woman
I had fixed her computer and she had invited me over for dinner and she was a good cook, I liked her, funny, a little young for me about forty, I tried to put her off a day because I knew it was going to bitch day for me. .


At the end of my long day I had forgoten about my dinner date. And drove home. Then I remembered I jumped back in my car and headed right over. Maybe a little late but not too late anymore. Problem was the only directions she gave me was it will be the house with the blue volvo in the driveway. I drove around for an hour finaly headed home to find her sitting on my couch, she had a smile like that buddha you drew. But I was so aggravated and tired I was not in the mood. I asked her to go home please lets meake it another time. I had been looking forward to a good dinner and sitting her couch.
I felt like Marlow in the Big Sleep when he found the blonde Stearnwood daughter in his bed.


That bit about a morbid orbit, that other woman the one who I stood up that night at the Temple. Her I would like to see again.

I would travel a thousand miles to see
if she still needs that back rub.
I picked up Look Homeward Angel again, read a few pages, I don't think I have finished reading anything for months. If it gets any worse I may have to start attending Friend's Meetings again.


"had an arrangement to meet a girl, and I was kind of late
And I thought by the time I got there she’d be off
She’d be off with the nearest truck driver she could find
Much to my surprise, there she was sittin in the corner
A little bleary, worse for wear and tear
Was a girl with far away eyes"

I wish I could be a Catholic but I ain't changing religions again. I am getting bored being a priest.

just what is the soul of a man

Funny when i think of Professor Z I think of Catholicism, some exchange between him and the lazy bear. I was thinking about a blues song not sure if it was Robert Johnson,
Lyrics:

I'm going to ask the question
Please answer if you can
Is there anybody's children can tell me
What is the soul of a man?


Won't somebody tell me
Answer if you can
Won't somebody tell me
Tell me what is the soul of a man?


I've travelled different countries
Travelled to the furthest lands
Couldn't find nobody could tell me
What is the soul of a man


Won't somebody tell me
Answer if you can
Won't somebody tell me
Tell me what is the soul of a man?


I saw a crowd stand talking
I just came up in time
Was teaching the lawyers and the doctors
That a man ain't nothing but his mind


Won't somebody tell me
Answer if you can
Won't somebody tell me
Tell me what is the soul of a man?


I read the Bible often
I try to read it right
As far as I can understand
It's nothing but a burning light


Won't somebody tell me
Answer if you can
Won't somebody tell me
Tell me what is the soul of a man?


When Christ taught in the temple
The people all stood amazed
Was teaching the lawyers and the doctors
How to raise a man from the grave


Won't somebody tell me
Answer if you can
Won't somebody tell me
Tell me what is the soul of a man?

Did i tell you I was looking at my frying pan this morning and the non stick surface is peeling off, some kind of toxic crap maybe Teflon, well I was looking at and I saw the face of Jesus right there on the bottom. I been thinking about getting a crock pot.

[jimboloco]

Maybe you can sell your frying pan on EBay.
Jesus in a frying pan, man.

you kook!