CAITLIN'S NEW DAY.

[dadio]

Caitlin stood by the window,
Felt and saw the sunlight, stood
In her nightdress, feet bare on
The cold linoleum floor, the few
Items of furniture around her,
And a locked door. Her mind tried
To block out the images, push them
Away, looked at the scene from the
Window, the grass, fields, trees, hills.
The police brought her here, had her
Locked up for a while, keep her safe,
Keep her ready for questioning later,
More questions, more lies, more tales
On tales. They thought she had shot
Both her parents through the back,
Chest and head, both left in the house,
Bloodied, spread out, dead. She had
The gun in her hand when they arrived,
Looking at the two parents on the bed,
The blood on the wall, sheets, pillows,
Floor. She touched the windowpane
With her fingers, ran a finger on the glass,
Made noise. Stopped. She couldn’t keep
The images away, images of her parents
Splayed out on the bed like rag dolls
With blood and bullet holes. Father had
Been a jerk. Always thinking himself right,
Having the power, the authority, the last
Word. Slow to praise, quick to punish.
Having that drawling voice, that pointing
Finger, that slapping hand, that Bible black
Hair and eyes. She shot him first. Bang in
The back as he fucked, then the head, bang
Dead. Mother had always crept in his shadow,
Never offered defence, witness to beatings, to
Lectures, to no meal days, just looking, dumb
Fucked, and that stupid gaze. She shot her next
As she screamed out, loud shouts, slugged her
In the breast, then the head as she lay open
Mouthed on the bed. Caitlin smelt disinfect.
The room was cold; the furniture was second
Rate and old. They had talked her through events,
Asked her questions, sat her down, stood her up,
Walked her round. Locked her up. Caitlin stood
By the window, saw sunlight, felt empty, heard
Birdsong, saw trees sway, a different moment,
Another haunting hour, a brightly lit new day.