Help me with these lyrics

Post your poetry, any style.
Post Reply
User avatar
Lightning Rod
Posts: 5211
Joined: August 15th, 2004, 6:57 pm
Location: between my ears
Contact:

Help me with these lyrics

Post by Lightning Rod » March 20th, 2008, 5:18 pm

these are the lyrics for a tune in progress
It's sort of a geriatric tune (I figure my audience is aging)
a samba
melody is still in progress

I need a bridge (I always need a bridge)
and I need a chorus
help me out here

This is the verse:

Let's file for Social Security
FDR can pick up our bill
We can retire, lounge in obscurity
just kick back and do what we will

Perhaps we should go down to Mexico
illegal immigrants two point o
hire americans to service our bungalow
the fast life is better when it's slow

I'll be frank, I thought of euthanasia
but I'm too curious for that, at least not yet
I've never seen Europe or Asia
I have memories I can't forget.

We could live on our annuities
take a loan on the house
but let's file for Social Security
or buy insurance and poison the spouse
"These words don't make me a poet, these Eyes make me a poet."

The Poet's Eye

User avatar
stilltrucking
Posts: 20646
Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas

Post by stilltrucking » March 20th, 2008, 8:30 pm

illegal immigrants two point o
is that like a type o
or like a Day O
talley me bananas

just curious
trying to hear the song
I wish I could help you with it

Lets all get saved
Lets play to the basest
To much hassle?
File for SSI

User avatar
sooZen
Posts: 1441
Joined: August 20th, 2004, 10:21 pm
Location: phar lepht in Tejas
Contact:

Post by sooZen » March 20th, 2008, 9:28 pm

do do's and dah dah's are always good for the girls in the back row.

great lyrics btw

let's see...

take my money
take my wife
take my trailer
i'm in strife

you got my retirement
just in time
and a dollar
ain't worth a dime

altogether now! dodododo a hahahaha! :wink:

User avatar
stilltrucking
Posts: 20646
Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas

Post by stilltrucking » March 20th, 2008, 10:31 pm

I don't know what a bridge is in music I will have to google


a copper penny
now worth two cents
My assets have doubled
is this a great country or what

User avatar
hester_prynne
Posts: 2363
Joined: June 26th, 2006, 12:35 am
Location: Seattle, Washington
Contact:

Post by hester_prynne » March 21st, 2008, 4:00 am

And in the evenin,
under covers
made of moonlight,
I'll whisper-sing blue moon,
in your ear,
and if nobody's listening,
I'll pretend there's somebody there.
"I am a victim of society, and, an entertainer"........DW

User avatar
stilltrucking
Posts: 20646
Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas

9631

Post by stilltrucking » March 21st, 2008, 5:25 am

I love you hester. You help me make it through the night.



9631

User avatar
Arcadia
Posts: 7964
Joined: August 22nd, 2004, 6:20 pm
Location: Rosario

Post by Arcadia » March 21st, 2008, 3:23 pm

a geriatric samba ( :lol: )
sounds good
but, please
don´t ask me to write one yet

ask my father instead
he will be plenty of time
in only some more days

User avatar
Doreen Peri
Site Admin
Posts: 14601
Joined: July 10th, 2004, 3:30 pm
Location: Virginia
Contact:

Post by Doreen Peri » March 21st, 2008, 3:54 pm

I don't get the "illegal immigrants two point 0" line.

I thought you were already retired, kicking back doing what you will. ;)

"I need a bridge! I need a bridge to jump off of!" - me

Sorry I'm no help.

Looks like you've got a lot of input! Good luck with this one.

User avatar
Lightning Rod
Posts: 5211
Joined: August 15th, 2004, 6:57 pm
Location: between my ears
Contact:

Post by Lightning Rod » March 21st, 2008, 11:29 pm

thank you guys for the ideas
the tune is progressing

soon as I can get into studio, I will post the latest version
nothing is ever finished
"These words don't make me a poet, these Eyes make me a poet."

The Poet's Eye

Post Reply

Return to “Poetry”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests