what is it about a good fight

[stilltrucking]

hip shot
i don't see no conflict here, maybe it is a chick thing.
There are lessons to be learned here, I would like to hear more from yabyum on what he managed to walk away from and how he did it.

The thing most on my mind is violence against women, it seems to be open season on women.

[Doreen Peri]

truckin' said

The problem with running like hell is it usaully involves turning your back on someone. Best to avoid the situation by being aware of ones enviorment. Avoiding dangerous situations, by the time my back was up against the wall it was too late. But I am changing the subject.

You're not changing the subject at all. The beauty of running like hell is it involves turning your back on someone. On the person or persons who are attempting to provoke you into conflict or violence or push your back up against the wall. I happily avoid such people and when I am unfortunate enough to be in such a situation, I happily turn my back on them and leave. Pretty simple, really.

K&D-
Yeah, I know you were kidding.

The example of the war (and any war, for that matter,) is a good one. Wars are unnecessary. They are a prime example of barbaric violence. They serve no purpose. Nobody wins. Ever.

If societies have used conflict to resolve moral dilemmas in the past, it certainly isn't working now.

To try to move someone into a position to view issues in a different way than they currently do is noble, however to try to PUSH someone "out of their comfort zone," could be greeted with negativity. I, for one, do not enjoy being "pushed" into anything. There is an equal reaction to every action. Someone pushes me? Guess what.... I just keep on going and move away from them. They push me right away.

[stilltrucking]

two women, an aunt and her niece, a third woman is a ghost, a mother to one and a grandmother to the other. Two brothers one old enough to be his sister's father the other woman his daughter. And a cedar chest. A house. An unbelievable house, five kitty litter boxes full of cat shit, a rabbit cage in the kitchen rabbit turds all over the floor, five obesse cats. Cat hair and vomit embedded in the rugs, The cedar chest is covered in cat hair and vomit. Just before the the aunt's mother died (a very good death at the home of her eldest son) she begged her daughter to take the cedar chest home. The daughter to meek to ask for it after her mother's death. The cedar chest sits for years. Finally her eldest brother gives it to his daughter. That is how it wound in that house. The aunt goes over one day to help with something. She sees the condition of the cedar chest. Now here is where I don't know anymore. Did she sweetly ask for it or did she demand it back from her niece. The aunt gets into it with her neice over the phone, just lets it all hang out, shouting crying, cursing, screaming. Now the niece has the advantage of having god on her side, she stays cool coldly reasoning that the chest is hers. The bottom line is my sister felt good when she was getting hysterical, but all the card's were stacked against her. My brother naturally takes the side of his daughter. Just got dam sad and if my sister had it to do over she probably would not have lost her cool. even though it felt so good while she was doing it. The niece has Jesus on her side she don't need no stinking compassion for her aunt. Women can be such bitches to each other KD this is what I meant about a man trying to figure out what two women are arguing about. I can see me and Doreen going around with this, but I did not see what you and doreen were doing

blue is edited

[K&D]

dor and i see the definition of conflict as something different thats all...were not being mean to eachother...

dor may have had a point about pushing people too hard, sometimes you can fuck it up and make them go the opposite direction, but getting people out of a situation that is normal i think is a good way for them to see something they haven't seen before...anyways...i think dor and i realize we can agree to disagree.

i would like to see more of yaby's opinion on the issue of conflict as well.

not all women are asses to eachother...sometimes i think its the oppresive state man has put us in that makes us more likely to fight within our own sex...but i try to avoid that, and i'm not saying all men are bad either.

[Doreen Peri]

Well, I don't experience women being bitches to each other. The women I know are all supportive of each other. I don't know what it means that "women are asses to each other."

That's not a world I live in.

K&D - I believe I've already stated my definition of conflict. If I haven't stated it clearly enough, let me know and I'll try again.

You say our definitions differ.

OK.

What is your definition of conflict?

[Arcadia]

Goethe´s class and someone saying that irony is an impotence mark, (just a thought). Life is contradiction, the point is when the contradiction is antagonic or we can only see dilemmas (my Jeckill-marxist side is talking).

[K&D]

a conflict: any sort of thing where there is a conflicting veiws which, for the purpose of this argument, would lead to an emotional conflict.

the other thing is that we do disagree essentially too...i think being mad is perfectly healthy and can lead to something benefiticial i'm not sure you feel the same way...feeling mad is natural and helpfull sometimes...like i said earlier...i don't know i think you and i won't come to an agreement.

i've seen women being bitchy too eachother a lot...not all, its a stereotype that sucks but sterotypes come from somewhere.

[K&D]

dor0 i beleive that pushying people and forcing them out of there natural environment is beneficial...where as your more of a nuturer...its cool its just a different way of going about seeking truth.

[Lightning Rod]

conflict is not the same as violence. You can have violence without conflict or visa versa.

Conflict is the basis for all drama. Perhaps that's why you are attracted to it, K&D. You are a theater person.

I appreciate conflict in drama, but I don't enjoy it so much in real life.

[K&D]

but conflict is essential to progress...and being mad is essential to life and progress as well, its a part of it, a natural part of it.

i sometimes think you guys are worriede that i'm implying i like violence and hatred...i'm just mentioning that it can be helpfull.

[Rat Bag]

Antz started Fight Club in the spirit of the movie. No blood, of course, and no bare fists. Bought a pair of head gear and some sets of gloves. Layed a tarp out in his back yard and pegged it down as a canvas. Hung some lights from the tree and drew up some score cards.

Now we beat the shit out of each other when ever we get the chance. We try to go easy at first, being mates and all, but once you score a whack to the head it's all on, you want to connect right back. Whack!

[K&D]

sometimes when my friend, the psyc major are at a friend of ours house, we take boxing gloves and we just sort of softly punch around and fuck around, get our agression out, no bleeding or anything, no hitting of the head and shit.

[Doreen Peri]

K&D-

I still don't think you have read the poem which I linked to. Had you read it, you would know that I believe that releasing anger is a necessary thing. It's how a person goes about it that makes the difference. If they release anger through violence, it is destructive and has no purpose. It is negative and dangerous. There are constructive ways to release anger.

About the "stereotype" you refer to. I've never heard of it. Honestly. I had no idea that women being bitchy to each other is a stereotype.

Young girls are sometimes bitchy to each other. I experienced that when I was a child. Not often but a few times anyway. But not from grown adult women. In my world, women think of each other as sisters and have a bond, whether spoken or unspoken. I feel such a kinship with other women, even when I hardly know them. It's almost as if we are one, in a spiritual way.

Your definition of conflict is the same as mine, by the way. So, I guess we'll have to agree to disagree, as you said. I see no use in conflict except in literature and music. (I'm repeating myself. It's a terrible fault I have. I repeat myself when I feel I haven't made my point well enough. Oh well. Sorry.)

[stilltrucking]

dor/lovingpenfull/hester

(

I missed that. totaly lost the thread.

Doreen that is the only way to deal with anger. Creatively you are right maybe the highest way is through art. Does no good to act it out, (maybe as KD if yu are an actor)

On an related note that bit about my sister and neice really hurt. My brother so insensitve to the closeness of the mother daughter relationship involved.

[stilltrucking]

the other thing is that we do disagree essentially too...i think being mad is perfectly healthy and can lead to something benefiticial i'm not sure you feel the same way...feeling mad is natural and helpfull sometimes...like i said earlier...i don't know i think you and i won't come to an agreement.

KD now you got another word, Mad, mad as a hatter. I am going to butt out now but my finall word is I have never done anything that was not stupid when I acted out of anger. I have never said anything helpful when I spoke in anger.

And dats da trude
I use my anger as energy and transform it into writing or music .... I let it out. I think it's healthy to get it out, to express it, but definitely not in a confrontational way with other people.

there it is Hester yes yes yes. Oh god I meant Doreen.