bluetooth bandit

Post your poetry, any style.
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emel.scott
Posts: 251
Joined: June 1st, 2008, 11:02 pm
Location: on my boat in Canton, Baltimore
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bluetooth bandit

Post by emel.scott » June 21st, 2008, 4:46 am

back before bluetooth
when you saw
someone on the street
talking to
no one in particular
you could
rest assured
they a had a link
to the other side
to the spirit world
where the reality
they spoke to
was as justified
and real for them
as the one
we are fooled by
every day
here
and it was
somehow comforting
for me to know
that when I was old
or feeble
or both
there was someplace else
someplace special
that only I could see
to which
I could look forward
to going
Last edited by emel.scott on June 21st, 2008, 8:19 pm, edited 2 times in total.
We should not mind if on our ear there fell. Some less of cunning, more of oracle...Thoreau

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the mingo
Posts: 9713
Joined: June 26th, 2005, 3:51 am
Location: Tug Hill Plateau

Post by the mingo » June 21st, 2008, 6:20 am

*Sparkle on the Monkey Train*

Right off I'll say go fuck yourself emel because this is the first piece of yours I've read that is straight up and coming at ya & taking no prisoners - it sat me up in my chair and straightened my spine and involved me as a reader - I love the idea behind this and how you sustained it from first word to last without any stink of personal fanfare - there is too much gush in this forum most of the time and we aren't respecting one another by all the pats on the back so I hope that what I'm saying here stands out from all that...there is not one wasted word in this piece of writing nor any wasted spaces between the words - YOU NAILED IT DOWN TIGHT AND ITS GOT SAND - you've just shown here that you can write when you want to and you respect your readers without fear so from here on out to forever this is what I'm going to expect from you every time -top shelf & under fire -ya hear?...and did i say go fuck yourself,emel?...well,in case ya missed it "GO FUCK YOURSELF, EMEL, YA BRILLIANT BASTARD!
Doll, you may have found a place of rest but I'm still on the trail.

saw
Posts: 8694
Joined: May 23rd, 2008, 7:32 am
Location: B'more, Maryland

Post by saw » June 21st, 2008, 7:38 am

nice flow, scott...rhythmic and concise as you roll with the message...
Enjoyed ....
If you do not change your direction
you may end up where you are heading

westcoast
Posts: 798
Joined: March 8th, 2008, 5:53 pm

Post by westcoast » June 21st, 2008, 9:56 am

i like the concept of the unknown being a friend. a good write.

~westie

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gypsyjoker
Posts: 1458
Joined: May 26th, 2005, 9:01 am
Location: stilltrucking's vanity
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Post by gypsyjoker » June 21st, 2008, 2:10 pm

dam
I was going to say I can relate to this one
but now I guess it just sounds like another got dam pat on the back right :?

only trouble with studio eight is people don't use enough emoticons, other than that I love this place. 8)

jt.
Free Rice
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'Blessed is he who was not born, Or he, who having been born, has died. But as for us who live, woe unto us, Because we see the afflictions of Zion, And what has befallen Jerusalem." Pseudepigrapha

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mnaz
Posts: 7844
Joined: August 15th, 2004, 10:02 pm
Location: north of south

Post by mnaz » June 22nd, 2008, 10:55 pm

It's just about like you say. I know a guy who walks around talking to no one in particular, that is, if you approach from the right side. He's got some sort of device stuck in his left ear.

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