domestic violience

Post by **creativesoul** » January 14th, 2009, 2:17 am

perhaps some are more suited to be docile and willing to drop whatever interests them to jump when he calls you from another room, all in the name of love which somehow becomes slavery, I have been made into a hostage. I get a few cell phone calls every day where he tells me he loves me, I repeat the prase but the passion has gone ........ out of my voice, there have been too many arguements of which I am to blame. I had gotten so used to fault finding from him, brow beating, long nights in the world of television, he is a couch potatoe from way back, and all the women before me i feel compassion for, knowing that they fell for his manipulation just as I did. He used to be sexually interesting, fun even. he had a good sense of humor even. Something changed, was it me? Was it him? Was it us?
Between the shrink, the anti-depressants and the straterra I have done everything I could do to kill my idenity and feel some sort of intimacy and love.
The fact is he is just not interested and he is laughing in the next room at a very stupid television show which I refuse to watch, He thinks by laughing that I will become interested in what he is laughing about.--- i am all too familar with the demmands and expectations of this one. I am really pleased with my art classes, I am finally going to do what makes me happy,
the other night when he was sitting om me and slapping me with all his might I saw light, I couldnt call 911 because he broke my phone, I got a new one and a better one anyway,I went to the doctor the next day and she had my chest x-rayed and took a look at my back, my black eye and my bruised chin, and my scared and sad disposition. I went to a counslor that day as well and told her of my plan to escape this relationship. we agreed to see each other in another three weeks when my decisons were more concrete and my head less fogged in...today he is all hearts and flowers and he does not know what I know about the cycle of domestic violince.
I feel sorry for the women that have had this experience and do not have thier own income and they are trapped because they have no way to surrvive unless they depend on social services which is far from actual help.
I had to have one of my crowns glued back on as the slapping in the face jarred it loose. Each time I sought medical assistance the doctors pulled me aside and told me they were obligated to report the violience.I did not report it to the police, I* just went about the bussiness if taking care of myself, and in the process I got the care I needed.
I know I am not perfect, and if I could keep quiet and not bite the bait perhaps there would be no conflict?
Maybe if I resign and remove myself from this relationship I could recultivate my innerpeace.
In the meantime I am doing what I need to do for me, to surrvive and maintain my life as it is right now. love is over rated

Post by **stilltrucking** » January 14th, 2009, 9:31 am

love is over rated

Anti-Love Drug May Be Ticket to Bliss

Could any discovery be more welcome? This is what humans have sought ever since Odysseus ordered his crew to tie him to the mast while sailing past the Sirens. Long before scientists identified neuroreceptors, long before Britney Spears’ quickie Vegas wedding or any of Larry King’s seven marriages, it was clear that love was a dangerous disease.

We got pretty warped culture if you ask me creative soul. When men are brought up to hate women for being women. And still be so needy for women.

Be careful
I hope you have some sisters for moral support.

Post by **Doreen Peri** » January 14th, 2009, 3:06 pm

This brought tears to my eyes.

Abuse like this is criminal. Literally. He should be charged.

Please be safe. Get away from him.

Love is not overrated, by the way. This is not love.

Post by **Nazz** » January 14th, 2009, 7:28 pm

Wow. This is not love, creativesoul. This is just inexcusable abuse. It's just saddening. I agree with Doreen. Get away from him as soon as you can. I wish you well.

Post by **hester_prynne** » January 15th, 2009, 12:10 am

Get going. There is no reason good enough to warrent staying in this scene. Pick up, start over. Women's shelters, are very good places in fact, and there are many set up just for you. You will get yourself back, you will be stronger, you will be happy. Don't look back. You are on the bridge that bridge that crumbles behind you, and that is a good thing, because you don't want to be on this route ever again. There is no easy way out, so forget about that. It's really hard. Get moving. It will only get worse. YOU KNOW THIS. Flowers in this situation are certain death.
Don't fall for them. Don't feel sorry for him or yourself. Just focus on one thing. Get out and that carries with it get moving. You have to leave this uncomfort comfort zone you're in.
Then you'll be able to write about how you saved yourself, and there is much better reading in that.
Hugs
H

Post by **Lightning Rod** » January 15th, 2009, 12:31 am

the couch potato and the tv watching are probably tolerable traits
violence is NOT a tolerable trait
get on your horse, gal
listen to your sisters here

I was brought up to believe that it's sloppy style if you can't manage your women without striking them.

Post by **Doreen Peri** » January 15th, 2009, 12:54 am

Lightning Rod wrote: I was brought up to believe that it's sloppy style if you can't manage your women without striking them.

Ugh. "manage your women"?

I just about threw up.

Post by **Lightning Rod** » January 15th, 2009, 1:09 am

I knew that phrasing would appeal to you

there is no emoticon for heavy irony

(think Archie Bunker)

Post by **Lightning Rod** » January 15th, 2009, 1:18 am

oops
I hope you feel better when your humor returns

Post by **Doreen Peri** » January 15th, 2009, 1:22 am

i feel fine. My sense of humor is quite intact. As always.

there's nothing funny about "manage your women"

especially used in a conversation about abuse

Post by **Lightning Rod** » January 15th, 2009, 1:30 am

your sense of humor may be intact, but it's not extensive
you think puns are high humor

I don't know why you don't find this humorous even after I tipped you off with the Archie Bunker reference. It's no accident that the character was named "Archie" because he was an arch character. But I guess you don't understand arch humor.

arch
adjective

1: principal , mischievous , saucy, marked by a deliberate and often forced playfulness, irony, or impudence

Post by **hester_prynne** » January 15th, 2009, 3:13 am

It's a sensitive subject to some of us......I'm sure no harm was meant, but I have to say I winced a bit myself......
She has got to get out.....
H

Post by **Lightning Rod** » January 15th, 2009, 12:41 pm

hester and doreen,

I didn't intend to upset anyone
I was trying to add a little levity to what is decidedly not a pleasant subject
that's when you need comedy

I can't believe you didn't get the humor in that doreen
when was I ever able to manage you?....haha

I agree 100% with both of you
violence is never acceptable

Post by **gypsyjoker** » January 15th, 2009, 12:54 pm

I used A lot of user names
not to confuse anyone
sometimes it is to amuse myself
depending on the mood I am in

I got mood swings
from here to Chicago

That is why I no long wish to be happy
I would rather be aware.

Happy just another mood swing
riding the bipolar roller coaster

Aware is my soul
an eye of the hurricane
the calm center rolling free.

Hester walks the talk
she know of what she speaks
I have watched her grow in strength over the years

love peace and taco grease
from the republic of texas
and all us sock puppets
still trucking et al.

Post by **Doreen Peri** » January 15th, 2009, 5:35 pm

Clay, I know you didn't intend to upset anyone and you were trying to joke around. I guess I just found the joking out of place and not funny. And yeah, I know you agree that violence is never acceptable.

I'm concerned for creativesoul's safety.

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