A love song

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mnaz
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A love song

Post by mnaz » February 14th, 2009, 4:50 pm

I was happier then
when the sun rose every day.
Before the constant fog of now.
We were happier then.

Our language of love
seems buried in the mists, fog won't lift.
I never used to notice the seasons turning.
It was always sunlight on the vein of a leaf.
I'd soak it all up and sprint out for more.
You offered grape juice when I returned.

I wobbled on my first bike
but soon I was riding a Sting Ray.
I rode all up and down that block.
It was summertime the whole time.

I must have pedaled too far.
All I have left is your touch,
in this quiet storm of winter,
and your love.

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goldenmyst
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Post by goldenmyst » February 14th, 2009, 5:20 pm

Mnaz, this exemplifies you poetic prowess. I know where you are coming from and lost love wistfulness is a feeling I feel all too often.

John

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justwalt
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Location: location infers reality... reality is still a theory

Post by justwalt » February 14th, 2009, 7:36 pm

why do memories have to last?
many is a word

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mnaz
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Joined: August 15th, 2004, 10:02 pm
Location: north of south

Post by mnaz » February 15th, 2009, 3:01 pm

John, Walt-- thanks for reading.

About the best thing I can say about this one is that just for a moment I was five years old again. It was a hard write otherwise, but something I had to say.

mtmynd
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Post by mtmynd » February 15th, 2009, 4:10 pm

good poetry has to reach out and touch the reader honestly and risk sounding foolish. this was a good poem.
_________________________________
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Allow not destiny to intrude upon Now

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Arcadia
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Post by Arcadia » February 16th, 2009, 7:41 pm

hermoso poema, mnazz..!

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SmileGRL
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Post by SmileGRL » February 18th, 2009, 3:55 pm

I never used to notice the seasons turning.
It was always sunlight on the vein of a leaf.
I'd soak it all up and sprint out for more.
You offered grape juice when I returned.


mnaz...i like the feeling these lines evoke...carefree. happy. kinda like icecream dripping on your naked skin and you just don't care summer moment.

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stilltrucking
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Joined: October 24th, 2004, 12:29 pm
Location: Oz or somepLace like Kansas

Post by stilltrucking » March 3rd, 2009, 9:00 am

All I have left is your touch,
in this quiet storm of winter,
and your love.
Even her touch is gone now these many years
but her love still lingers.

beautiful poem
I wish I had your memories.




"From a child of five to myself is but a step. But from a new-born baby to the child of five is an appalling distance." Leo Tolstoi.
Last edited by stilltrucking on March 3rd, 2009, 9:44 am, edited 1 time in total.

saw
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Location: B'more, Maryland

Post by saw » March 3rd, 2009, 9:19 am

beautiful courage and honesty......I know what you mean about, just feeling the need to write something like this, but not just write it, to share it as well........well done
If you do not change your direction
you may end up where you are heading

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