Nausea

[stilltrucking]

I can't stand to look at the newspaper some days
The the models in the ads for women's underwear make me sick
The longing is that deep.

[SadLuckDame]

Like this kind of image?
I really like this one.

[mtmynd]

Strong resemblance to Drew Barrymore...

[SadLuckDame]

Drew is the most beautiful woman I think I've seen in newspapers, magazines and movies. Yes, it's Drew. Lovely in her stockings and betty boop kiss.

[stilltrucking]

no not like that dame, she has to be annonymous, someone I don't know before I can stare at her body like Homer Simpson drooling over a doughnut.

That is just you in your nightie or what ever that is. Too bad I know you sort of. i might have got a rise out of that picture if you had been a stranger.

Let us worship Aphrodite. She's beautiful but flighty. She doesn't wear a nightie, but she's good enough for me.
- Joseph Campbell

Thinking about the girl in my seventh grade homeroom class and how I would walk around with tented pants evertime I saw her in that black skirt. Only girl in the whole got dam school that used to do that to me.

Dam I miss my penis.
Have you seen it anywhere?
I lost back in Fefruary of 1980 in a freezing bedroom in Virginia.
But she gave me this picture.

[tarbaby]

My last vagina sung to the tune of His Last Duchess
I have to edit the picture you can read her signitature it.
It was a measure of my disconnect between my mind and body
my brain and my penis
that I would even try to fuck in a room that was five degrees below zero, I had goose bumps more erect than my dick.
Never forget the look on her face that morning.
The night before it was warm and toasty in that room and it was good.
But the stove went out during the night.
It was colder than a well digger's ass
colder than a witches tit.
in that room

but I had not been laid in four years
before that night before
and i wanted one more turn at bat
yeah

I think I am done with this topic for a while
but you all can stick around

[SadLuckDame]

That's not me, it's Drew and you've only seen me from my chin up. Bah! It's been five times last week. I don't know any of them.
Tomorrow I'll wake up, but today's Sunday.

[stilltrucking]

Chin up is good for me
I was wondering what the hell you were doing posting a picture of yourself in your underwear.

Five times?

That is about how many times I have done it in a life time.

I was always a long time finding a lover but every couple years I would meet a woman who liked freaks, some times I would go four or five years, once seven years. But this has been quite a streak. After about twenty years I started to realize that part of my life was over. Apart from the occasional nausea I am starting to adjust to that. Same with the road, I have nailed my shoes to the kitchen floor.

I sure would like to see the ocean one more time. Only 150 miles from here.

I thought that picture was of you, and I was getting nervous.

One thing is for sure, I love women but from a distance, I could never live with onte again. God no.

I wish the hell I was in a cave somewhere away from everyone I know, no telephone, just some books and a computer.

I am a hermit at heart..

But janis joplin tells me I got to stay here and look out for my sister and her son and husband.

The white knight syndrome I suppose.

[SadLuckDame]

I'd not be that brave.
I couldn't pull off that shot without hiding my face each snap.
Yes, only thought of it five times last week. It's getting less and less on the mind. I might be maturing quickly now that I'm visiting reality more often. I guess I'm done talking about it too. I might get depressed.

[stilltrucking]

I guess I'm done talking about it too.

Ten four
I still think about it too
but I don't do anything about it anymore.

Just write my way out of it
moving on now.
good night
thanks for taking an interest
sincerely

The line about the sperm bank

"Listen, don't worry about me. I've had a lot of experience doing this. Why, when I was in high school I carried around a picture of my hand in my wallet . . ."

City Slickers