gabapentin passing thoughts

[stilltrucking]

Well you know I just want to hold your hand sometimes cause it gets me through the scary parts.

it is what keeps her always gentle on my mind

inFreindship
jt

[SadLuckDame]

Scared is an option...
one of your worms caught a big fish
and I wished on it.

with our friendship.
Each day I worry you'll tire of me.
I guess cause I spend a lot of time with myself
I begin to think I'm dull
only I do know at least you left the windows open
which might neat things blow in.
ppp

squeeze, bite.

[stilltrucking]

Each day I worry you'll tire of me.

our fear there is congruent

the window is open but I don't see the horse today

I dig this picture a lot it is called metaphysical landscape

[SadLuckDame]

There's this concern cause I wonder
if we're at a disadvantage by going blindly without use of most of our senses
and words alone, but we greet the challenges
in other words it's kind of erotic.

Must be more strength than disadvantage
for introverts
or making language art
if we must we must embrace this evolution
creating a new world where we inhabit
and it's what has an energy.

I likes the doorway.

[short timer]

I am a wormy guy
full of snails and puppy dog tails



The Cosmological eye — henry miller


page 287 about Anais Nin's dream

In this extraordinary unicellular language of the female we have a blinding, gem-like consciousness which disperses the ego like star-dust.

[SadLuckDame]

Yes. (her mirror only shows what's on top)
I know exactly the feeling of wrestling with women.
If I write that I'm having a bad day, I may encourage the Dame to rattle me over the flames and she'll go, "You boneless worm, don't take me with you then."

And she'll leave me to bet the races instead.
I'll question why I went weak in the knees, then get my monies together to try to steal away with Cat to win more money then the dame. Cat knows horses.

Or Cat will be the one to toss me over a bridge
and he'll keep Dinah instead.

Thanks for tripping with me, Jack.
I like when you go hunting in the lake.
You're the most brilliant when it comes to knowing I don't likes diamonds
I like the extraordinary treasures you find.

P.S. I knows why it scares you,
you are just likes Henry! Roawr
ppp

[stilltrucking]

I will have to see if I can find more info about it.
Henry trying to protect his mother from bears, a kids book.

Funny what happens to little girls when the get to p ubescence. I read so many tales by women and so many studies of the phenomenon. So many girl ch ilds loose their self confidence at that age.

Another book from my past Memois of an Ex-Prom Queen

Well can hardly read anything erotic anymore. Still an excitable boy. But you know I would not be able to read Henry Miller except for that fact that I have grown up with you. Salacious, I will have to look that word up in my Funk and Wagnals. I thought TOC was going to be salacious.

It is fun to flirt
that's all
I could not afford a mail order bride.
I think I am going to have to sell my motorcycle. Going to b uy a little boat to paddle up shit creek.

Probably what scares me most is losing my dignity to the forlorn rags of old age infirmities. I think I need to join the St udio Eight Fitness Cl ub

good night friend

[SadLuckDame]

I grew within a shell
then stepped out with expectations of sea life.
There was nothing green and the blue sunk under a film of plastic guts.
Little girls are pulled apart and everyone has their hands on them,
the men want to taste salt, to fall blue and break her back on the spot.
It's like a hit of intensity.

But, I returned to the sea. I placed the guts away.
I didn't turn back,
and I never returned of salt.

Catfish was a bargaining man.
He'd tip his hat and toss his cross, there was none
and symbolically he was clean with an empty hand.

He played poker, won chess and frazzled the sailors' wind.
He was Cody Catfish and he didn't give up,
but walked taller then Batman, tamed the June with orange tress
and his spirit is the color of water when the moon casts the road going over-boards.

If I'm in the water, then that's how we met.
Catfish monk sings the blues and Thelonious plays jazz under the starry night
when he's rowing the groove towards a metaphysical gap.

Sleep well, my friend.

[the mingo]

my squeaker broke down in the commission of this poem. snow on the eagles nest in iowa. at least the meat won't spoil she says & then tells me about a trucker riding a bus to the border carrying everything he owns in a single bag that weighs one hunderd and seventy five pounds. Even for a guy his size it's a strain to get it up on his shoulder. I don't know what to do about the snow. I could dust it for fingerprints to see if it's really from the united states of eagles.

[short timer]

the stilling of a primal scream
the underground stream
wants to surface into a spring

jimboloco

yes spring again
nothing much happening
just one more fine day

nice weather
listening to Henry
talking about despair anguish and frustration don't go to an analyst, see it through

maybe so


I betcha old Henry did not leave a chindi ((Navajo)to walk this earth and make trouble for the living. only young babies and old men who have lived long and good do not leave a chindi.

you taught me more than I taught you Dame
you are a poet
you are a women

Calvin Hobbes
I will never grow up
I will always be that kid in the strip

funny how some women need a man to take care of
And some men can not live without a woman to take care of them.
That is why crazy mike died after rose put him out
because as much as she might have needed a husband, she needed her daughter more. Only problem being when a mother makes sacrifices for a daughter she must not resent it and through it in her daughter;s face when her little girl seems to want to go her own way. Yes mother's should save their resentment for their sons. gabentin got me gabby, I don't think it does much good for the pain. More a recreational drug now.



gabapentin again

[short timer]

I missed you mingo

waiting on the money to get my MRI, it has been three months and I still can barely use my right arm. They give me t his gabapentin bu t it don't seem to help excepts for the unintended consequences of this ecstatic typing.

I been thinking about headless roosters and the price of bread and what Henry Miller said about

Combating the system is nonsense there is only...file

see attached

Combat one of those words that strikes a chord with me even if I am a four f hippy conscientious objector Quaker freak...I don't know when a man is supposed to take up arms against a sea of troubles
I think about Camus, who wrote for the French underground news paper Combat

Fellaheen is a troubling word for me to use, the beatniks picked up from Spengler's Decline of The West, Spengler a hero of the Nazis, but so was Nietzsche so maybe the Nazis got Spengler wrong too.
Kerouac had a golden age of the fellaheen in mind. But that is a long time ago,

sorry for the long ramble gabapentin gabby thoughts
weird stuff. I stopped taking it for a while because of the panic attacks, I got all the suicidal thoughts I need I don't need no side effects

[SadLuckDame]

I'm spending the day with Henry and Anais after watching that video I found dinner with Henry, then this little treasure too.

[short timer]

You are in good company
I listened but I can't remember anything but th is bit
"I never missed water till the well went dry"

repression like a dream state too.
nothing to do with nothing but I like what he said Anais and analysts

speaking of repression

Another fear my Calvin and Hobbes sense of humor is going to get my tit caught in the wringer.

how many times did I tell my baby sister a joke that she did not think was witty. Like living with ones sister has all of the disadvantages of living with a woman and none of the advantages.

I been hanging with these guys today



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRGl6Twe ... re=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytVww5r4 ... re=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOd1Vfag ... re=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UgdLVWgU4G0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKHhpzFS ... playnext=1

[SadLuckDame]

mmm
you treated me delightfully.
We could be spoiled in advantages someday, Jack
This is starter for the fire, feeling good sort of day.

[jackofnightmares]

I remember a bit she said about drugs and writers

I approach gabapentin with a some trepidation, the withdraw symptoms in the literature are spooky. I had to think twice about taking one today.

I hope to spend more time with Henry and his better half llater today, I have only listened to it once so far.

thanks for the video.

first thoughts
first words
free association
"the spirit game"