I am tripping more than you are. Battling razzberries

[SadLuckDame]

I had a couple dreams, mingo.
I had this really pretty little one. It was a giant fish tank, I didn't see where it began nor where there was end. We were feeding fish, three or four sorts of fish.
I know I put in this flaky type food that fizzled and bubbled the moment it hit the water, really neat to watch, but it didn't last long. A few fish were accustomed to it already and knew to dive in at first bites. But, some fish didn't know, they never saw such site, ya know? They questioned and grew curiouser and curiouser.

I remember this group of fish with a lot of colors. One was colors of reds, one was shades of blues, etc. like that. Well, they'd never had a proper introduction, I mean they never were introduced without the choice of their own meal (which they always settled on, pellets).

When I gave them a discovery without an option of other than, they were confused. I watched them contemplate, they came in close and mingo that close-up was spectacular! their faces were a mermaids, they had big beautiful feminine eyes and pouty lips. Like a chorus they skimmed the surface, the closer they got to the food there the closer their pretty pouts came to my view. They were such sirens or minx. One broke away from the 'song' the chorus and bravely she selected some flakes just as I dropped it to the surface. She had courage and that brave face was what woke me up from my sleep. I woke with my last image being her wide open eyes and tasting mouth.
Good stuff.

It was seeing evolution, anyway that's how it struck me.
Watching the wheel, but the wheel moves around and it can go a little forward depending on if someone moves it...
the siren was choosing to move it a little in front of her.

I miss you too.
Thank you for the poem
and reaching out to me.

Let's ride the horses to the new world,
it's our introduction of sorts.

[the mingo]

dreams of feeding fish with pouts and big eyes...i woke before dawn without remembering any dreams...i mean if you have a dream you don't remember does it make a sound ?

reaching out...yeah, that. well ya know it's because i get scared some other magician might enchant you off. i was born completely selfish and there's never been any improvement in that area.

i was never any kind of believer in self-improvement schemes in the first place. seemed to me all those things are geared to treating symptoms while root causes laugh at the pretense.

the indulgent heart rules and knows no cure.
or wants one.

the heart is a fish with wide open eyes
and a tasting questing curious mouth

new horses new worlds
introductions all around

[SadLuckDame]

I went to church today, my first goings since three years ago.
The conversation on relations.

Sumpin' mentioned of giving time is giving life. If we rob a person of life, then we rob them of their time. But, if we give a person time, then we give them life.
I always want you to have life, the more I can give you the more life I feel.
When I don't write, then I am reading here, dreaming there, thinking of and and and...you can always have my time.

There's hardly anyone I would say that to.
Prolly my children, family and the needy. I've a few friends (mostly girls) I'd give time with to be with. Interesting, I think.

Catfish has my heart, he knows (if you're Catfish then you knows)
and he's a magician, an actor, a very good whistler. He's Cody and Henry, Hemingway and Tom. He's got me. He's got charms and wit, lots of funnies,
plus a lots of hats. We swim, we dine, he makes me hungry and I do want him to have my times.

I'd be his Alice or Sally. I'd wrestle a big fat snake. I'll climb in bare-feet, live off honey, and and I'd be his mail away lady that writes him letters and confesses her attentions.

What attractions! more, more and more.

[the mingo]

kayaking yesterday. got out late about three in the afternoon. we got a good workout, Whew! fought our way upstream a mile and a half just so we could turn around and let the current take us back down. went down into the cattail marshes to see the turtles but none of them showed, Not one.
Coming down out of the hills there got to thinkin' 'bout the way water and land how they are with one another. Got to thinking about the sequence of events in Genesis. It says God's first act was the creation of light yet Scripture reveals that something was present before light was spoken into being and that something was water.

you cracked me up when you said you would wrestle a big fat snake.

what am I doing up so damn early? went to bed early is why. water and boat took it right out of me.

got rain here in the pre-dawn darkness. water again. even whiskey is half water. our blood even more so.

Catch you later u mail away snake wrestler u.

[SadLuckDame]

Out on the water, in is the water.
A river, a river is calling to me.
You're a great river, mingo darlin'.

[the mingo]

Sorry didn't get here yesterday and i have spent most of this morning answering a question Jack put to me on my log. For the answer i had to get into things of Scripture which is certainly boundless. By the time i was done i had been visited by both tears & joy. Whew! Now i'm wore out in the best way. the answer to Jack's question got a lot wider and deeper and higher than i thought it was going to be at the start. and some things brought up by it are going to be on my mind and heart for sure the rest of today and, hopefully further. Friends scarcely realize, i think, that the good they intend is oftentimes much much more than the good they intend.

got rain. and deep deep greens because of it. so up so down so round & around.
i can't stand myself most the time. gonna go make a quick postcard for ya. i'm way behind the curve here. it's Jack's fault. i'm sure of it i'll post the card when i'm done. got to have some toast first. with butter. lots of butter. and raspberry jam, tons of it. that's how i win against the ruthless unwashed pagan hoards of razzberries - i eat them. down to the last little seed.

[SadLuckDame]

I just watched an episode of Nero Wolfe about the gold spider earrings.
I'm pretty sure I'm happier and at more rest than most.

Thanks for the fish.
I eat good these days.
I'm eating enough that now I'm sleepy.
Sweet dreams.

I look forward to it.

[the mingo]

well just wonderful - i made the card and somehow did not post it as I intended -
sheesh - ok. here's the card and i'll catch ya tomorrow, Doll.

[the mingo]

sitting in a kayak can get you to wondering. sat in one last weekend munchin' on a double long fig newton. I had back-tailed into a space out of the current behind a big rock and was just floatin'.
got to wondering 'bout a world of possibilities. which is fine unless it blinds you to the world you are actually in. the one we are born into. the one our entire existence takes place in. and the one we finally die from and out of. yeah, that world.

the one you can sit in a kayak in and wonder about a world of possibilities. In the Lord of the Rings Gollum gives Frodo a word of caution when they entered the marshes on the way to Mordor. He told him, "Don't follow the lights". It proved out to be a solid piece of advice as events came to show.

from time to time I wonder how things would have turned out had I not followed the lights and had listened to a Voice instead.

That's all I got today, Doll.

[SadLuckDame]

I'll tell ya one of the sensual dreams here in the razz.
It was right, just felt right, which is a difficult emotion to feel.
I was laying on a mattress outside on a back porch. I didn't have all the items I needed there, so I was laying there thinking of those few items, items I liked having on me to feel I have all I need.

Anyway, this guy came out to the porch, I knew him and he needed to make a phone call, he needed to write in the notebook, but I was using both at the same time. He was being patient and waiting. Once it occurred to me that he may need both, I hung up the phone and gave it to him, and told him I'd give him the notebook once I finished writing my list of the items I needed.

Eventually he laid down on the mattress too. He never intruded, he didn't try to interrupt me or force on me or anything, it was just me in my little space of me and he in his little space of him, lying side-by side in a space we started sharing.

Since he never intruded or pushed for my coming out of my space of thinking or what it was I was doing, I didn't ever mind what he was doing. He laid his hand across my chest and told me in this far away fashion, though he was right there, told me he could feel my beat, beat, beat.

It was so nice to be not so alone in my being alone.
I liked sharing like that, no intrusion, no bringing me out of it, just an acceptance and just to be by me without needing me. It was warm and comfortable, I felt loved there with my heart going and the ability to lay as I was.

[the mingo]

good dream. you got a good handle on it too. was going to delve into some details on it when I first read it this morning but the day took off and me with it. Was going to write more too but now at the end of it all I think I'm headed for bed and the book I'm reading by the name of Tomato Red by Daniel Woodrell. Tomorrow company is coming but i don't know what time. My youngest son was here today.
Didn't get out with the boats because everyone was between other things. The lodge was like a roadhouse today with comings an.d goings. Now it's time to turn off the light. 'Nite, Doll.

[SadLuckDame]

The embrace in the postcard got me thinking...
must have fallen asleep on it.

I don't know what today will be.

[SadLuckDame]

Five vibrant stockings
hung up side-by-side.
The wind to lift their tips
and the sun down on the sides.

Threads weaving to and fro.

On the line like this.
On-line, our line, line
by side, by side.

If there is two of us,
it's only that I was thinking
two of us, then the last stocking

I guess it's for Annie.

Just a girl
a girl like any girl,
but to name a girl
is just to name her
and then there's a certain
familiarity.

Familiar with Annie.

Her reddish and gold hair,
like a strawberry blond hue
with movement to it.

Waves that go as water over stones,
over crayfish shells and frog mouths,
mouths that say, "Bog." in the middles
of nowheres, only somewheres
that Annie is.

Annie, to let her hair down,
to set it sail in the creek bed.

Not to be frail,
to be a sailor in the forest.

Her voice sings softly to trees
and birds, to put her toes in the moss,
with it's coolness.

I don't think she minds the worms
whom crawl
and knot their bodies
on the palm of Annie's hand

or burying dead creatures
on the crumbled cake forest floor,
then praying
over their small heads.

Dear God, make their fluff fur useful as clouds,
now that they're gone from us, gone.
Place them, place them high.
I will look up.

I think she's older than her years,
but never began counting em up,
never did she say to herself
that she should know her time.

But, Annie can be any girl,

maybe she's twenty-four,
and has been living since King Arthur.

You and I like Annie
even though we're only beginning to know her.
But, if we like her
then we can assume she might have a sweetheart
and that her sweetheart likes her too.

Prolly she'd want to give the sock to him,
he, that's sweet with her.

(I began this elsewhere with you, but I did likes Annie a lot and wanted to keep her here, too.)

[the mingo]

I guess it's for Annie

I think you must be right.

Annie, it's so May right now. I been out and about and it's so May right now ya wouldn't believe it with the sun & the grass & all the trees burstin' into leaf it seems overnight and at once ! And there are summer women on the streets and there is a cool edge to the warmth. Not the heavy heavy heat of July yet but just that warmth with the cool edge on it. Dandelions and the snakes out hunting for mice and frogs & mates. It's May, Annie, it's May.

[SadLuckDame]

Looking lovely in the sunshine.
Sweet May, she gorgeous in her blossoms.
Sweet dreams dear mingo.