But I wanted fire in my eyes

Post your poetry, any style.
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Kailashana
Posts: 466
Joined: August 4th, 2011, 1:52 pm

But I wanted fire in my eyes

Post by Kailashana » August 29th, 2011, 9:57 am

i.

Your lips wound me
with the beauty of your poems,
parchment-thin my heart
must always listen,
I do not know what comes over me,
even now
is it my shallow art?

The moon rising near the end of August banishes me
to the hinterland,
sea to sand,
we were destined to meet.

"There are better uses of time.", I protested
you said nothing
and left me
with
a killing frost.

ii.

Leaves fall into an eternal green,
benevolent,
the living branch
loses no tender bark.

The desert that is loneliness
sees another mirage, the hundredth monkey
writes another poem and the sun rises
as if nothing ever happens.

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the mingo
Posts: 9713
Joined: June 26th, 2005, 3:51 am
Location: Tug Hill Plateau

Re: But I wanted fire in my eyes

Post by the mingo » August 29th, 2011, 10:49 am

8)
Doll, you may have found a place of rest but I'm still on the trail.

saw
Posts: 8697
Joined: May 23rd, 2008, 7:32 am
Location: B'more, Maryland

Re: But I wanted fire in my eyes

Post by saw » September 1st, 2011, 11:13 am

this is good...subtle in its suggestions about poetry and the author or authors perhaps...." a killing frost" may be a reference to Robert, ..."Leaves" may be a reference to Whitman .....but even if they aren't intended , the poem holds up on its own merit.....once again, a powerful closing stanza....you have a noticeable gift for that.....keep 'em coming I say........peace, steve (saw), either one is fine
If you do not change your direction
you may end up where you are heading

Kailashana
Posts: 466
Joined: August 4th, 2011, 1:52 pm

Re: But I wanted fire in my eyes

Post by Kailashana » September 1st, 2011, 11:23 am

Thank you for the 8) mingo.

Steve, in a moment of self's annihilation, the multitudes of myself became... tender leaves.

~

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