dearest do-nothing preventer: a secret letter to a muse

[mindbum]

dearest do-nothing preventer,

i’ve missed you these many months––
all motivation has drained
like so much b lood from the mortician’s
big toe incision–– the cold slab
stainless steel table at an incline––
there is a gutter for blood
& other fluids––

i have been embalmed in me own
juices of regret, self-loathing,
loneliness & laziness––

the room is cold tile & steel & cement––
there is a drain in the middle of the room.

a plain green gardenhose hangs
coiled on the wall––

that deadly asp sprays venom––
a universal solvent washes
even blood away
from the grout between the tiles
that surround the drain––
the whole floor grades to guide fluids––
what happens past that drain grate?

is that the place to look
for what’s run out of me?

down the drain where blood runs pale––

you’re being dramatic you say––
mayhap, but tell me how you feel
when you can’t find the self
that’s supposed to be in this body
you take everywhere you go––

i’m looking for my self––
have you seen it? it’s drained
like so much dust from time––

that’s what’s to be found––
dust & empty wonder
of what’s become of me.

[mindbum]

2.

i tried to summon you.
i wento the midnight cafe
and read surrealism about the moon.
i am a risk-taker going there
to conjure you.
i summoned your doppelganger instead.
she smiled when she saw me look at her.

[Doreen Peri]

Dark. Painful. Passionate.

Thanks for sharing.

Sounds like Love to me.

Part 2 really brought it all together.

Nice!

(spellcheck - embalm )

[hester_prynne]

MB, I have to tell you again how much I enjoy your writing.
These are really beautiful.
It's funny, I had a dream I was writing a poem about drains the other night. Something about an old sugar cone that landed upside down on an old worn out metal drain.......

doppelganger.
the perfect word.

H

[mousey1]

Good writing....

Really, really, liked part 2.

Thanks for the read.

[mindbum]

more like lost love
or love chased off.

and you wish you could make sense of yourself.
it's a theme.

thank you for the reading.
part 2 seems to have gone over well.

and i'd almost think part one could use a fine tooth comb.

peace