Age Over Easy - a one act play

[Doreen Peri]

Scene 1.

Him - Let's go to IHOP for brunch. Get ready.

Her - Let's wait a bit. I have some work I need to get done.

Him - Let's go now. They have Seniors Specials. I'm hungry and I've never ordered a Senior's Special before. I could save a dollar.

Her- OK. That's a big savings. I'll get ready.

Him - Hurry up! I'm not getting any younger.

Her- OK. I'm ready. Let's go eat.

Him - Let's go. OK


Scene 2.

Him - Two please, smoking.

Hostess - Yes sir. Follow me, sir.

Him - Thank you.

*looking at menus*

Him - See here? Senior Specials. They're all like a dollar cheaper. Do you think they'll question my age? I mean, I don't have any ID to prove I'm old enough. I've never done this before.

Her - I don't think they'll question it, but if they do, we'll just pay the extra dollar.

Him- No! I shouldn't have to pay the extra dollar if I qualify as a Senior. And I do. I'm 56.

Her - Yep. You've qualified for over a year now. Why haven't you done this before?

Him - I always figured I look to young and they'd question my age and I have no ID to prove it. I'm worried the waitress will question my age.

Her - Don't worry, sweetheart. We can always pay the extra dollar.

Him - No! That's not right. Because I qualify.

Her - OK, dear. What will you be ordering?

Him - Right here. See? One pancake, one egg, one link sausage, one piece of bacon, one piece of toast, and hash browns. Senior Special #4.

Her - OK. Sounds delicious.

Him - Yeah. I hope they don't question my age.

Her - Don't worry. If they do, we can always pay the extra dollar.

Him - No! I qualify!

Her - OK. I believe you.

Him - Good! Thank you. I've never done this before.

Her - Well, you should have started over a year ago. Think of all the dollars you would have saved!

Him - Yeah, but I was afraid they'd question my age.

Her- I know.


Scene 3.

Waitress - Good morning! What can I get you today?

Her - I'll have the Quick Breakfast, 2 eggs over easy, hash browns and a toasted English muffin. Coffee, please, a small orange juice, and a glass of ice water.

Waitress - Yes, ma'am! Thank you for your order. And you, sir?

Him - Tomato juice, please, small. And see here? #4 on the Senior Special.

Waitress - Yes, sir! How would you like your egg?

Him - 56

Waitress - Sir?

Him - I'm sorry, I have no ID to prove it, but it's true. I'm 56.

Waitress - Sir? How would you like your egg?

Him - 56, really! I'm not kidding.

Her - Honey, she's asking you how you'd like your egg, not what is your age?

Him - Oh. Over easy, please.

Waitress - Yes sir!

Her - *whispering to waitress* Sorry, he's a little hard of hearing.

Him - What's that you say? You lost an earring?

[hester_prynne]

Ha! This is funny! I laughed right out loud.
I haven't laughed all week so thank you for this!

H

[Dave The Dov]

So reminds me of Samuel Beckett!!!! Absurdity at it's best!!!!
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[mousey1]

Chuck chuck chuckle chuckle chuck chuck chuckle!!!!!!

Too funny Doreen.

Did this really happen? Tell me Do, whisper it....it was Lrod wasn't it, the little skinflint!!!! No, no, course it wasn't you're both way too young!

I long for the day when I can get a buck off!!!!

My motto is...."If I'm laughing I'm not crying."

Thank-you

[Doreen Peri]

me? Whisper? ha!

yep, a slightly embellished real life drama, Lrod, the star of the story.... he's 56, you know.... not eggzactly... he'll be 57 in November.

Glad you liked the yoke! I cracked up writing it down.

I've got that same motto, mousey!

We were going to order crepes but then the waitress would have asked, "How would you like your crepes to be made?" and Lrod would have answered, "Thank you! You think I look great for my age?" lol

Thanks for reading.

[Dave The Dov]

Wait I don't get it????
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[Axanderdeath]

So reminds me of Samuel Beckett!!!! Absurdity at it's best!!!!

I don't know about "Absurdity at it's best!!!!" But it was extremly funny. Is this taken from real life? And if so who's? Really I don't need the answers to those two questions, but it was funny. And it was slightly Absurd I am just not sure if it was aburdity at it's best.

[Doreen Peri]

Hi Dave - yeah, Beckett was absurdity at its best, for sure! This was just an embellished real life scenerio and to compare it to Beckett is wowowow... pretty darn flattering but nahhhh... it's just what happened the other day, though I did add a few lines. Thanks much! Glad you got a kick out of it.... The joke you didn't get, well, maybe it was lame, I guess.. I was trying to say that when being escorted by a senior who is hard of hearing and concerned about whether people would believe him when he claimed to be a senior, he might misunderstand the words which were spoken (same as in my little real life adaptation of a play) --- so "crepes" could sound to him like "great!" and "made" could sound to him like "age" -- weak, yeah... oh well! Just making myself laugh over here.... Thanks again, Dave!

Geoff - Glad to give you a laugh... And yeah, as I said, it was taken from real life... Lrod was ordering the Senior Special... *smile*... I just made up some other stuff to go along with the scene because I thought it was a funny scenerio!

Thanks again, Dave, mousey, and Geoff, for giggling along with me!

[Dave The Dov]

Old Sam is smiling down on you and he thanks you as well and so I'm I.
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