May I (can I even) claim to know you yet

[joel]

May I (can I even) claim to know you yet
when years have passed since seeing you
and written words and electric sounds have been our only handshakes—
little more than sporadic replacements for emotive touch?

When years have passed since seeing you,
I’m pained to reason reason’s replaced your hand in mine
little more than sporadic replacements for emotive touch.
What idealism shines so harshly that I see not my own self-destruction?

I’m pained. To reason reason’s replaced your hand in mine
may be mental circus acrobatics I’m too weak to perform under
what idealism shines so harshly that I see not. My own self-destruction
seems choked in place by an anaconda-monster thought: I know you yet.

Maybe mental circus acrobatics (I’m too weak to perform under
anything else, I’m afraid) may lead me blind to face what
seems choked in place by an anaconda-monster thought. I know you, yet
I know you turn no somersaults for knowing me.

Anything else I’m afraid may lead me blind. To face what
future means as growing and living, I yearn to discern truly what
I know. You turn no somersaults for knowing me;
may I (can I even) claim to know you yet?

[hester_prynne]

I feel like I understand this piece, without really understanding it.
If that makes sense....
lots of good imagery and feeling here

"What idealism shines so harshly that I see not my own self-destruction?"
Wow, and touche`
H

[joel]

Thanks for your thoughts and comments!

Funny you should mention understanding it without understandning it--that seems to have been the exact gut-place I was writing it from.

[mtmynd]

Expression can be vastly more important that understanding, and this was expressed well, Joel... a lot of emotion that begged for release may have spilled like fine wine, but even spills tell interesting stories.

[Axanderdeath]

Anaconda-monster thought

First of all I like that line—big line. As for the poem I don’t think I got it. Are you saying that you are in love with some one that has just come back to you?
Are you saying that you always are somebody’s friend and then they go away and then you start together. And if it is, which I think it may be, about death I am sorry. I don’t know much more than anyone, probably less than most for all my assholeish behavior I have had a pretty lucky life. I like it though…