dear yabby

[gypsyjoker]

When I said I hated you for not being able to write for you, -to write so spontaneously and clean- but then I said I did not envy you the job. That is because I could not even hope to begin to physicaly able to do it. To wore out. Now that is just because I am me. If I was Gary Snyder I could do it. Now there is a bad old man. Old sigmund fudd used to say the best we could do in this insane world {he did not say insane, allthough considering the times in which he lived he must have surely thought it}
It just don't get any better than finding work you enjoy. I think that was m-t's whole point in that work/play of his

There is a one eyed poet in a book called Canticle For Lebowitz, reminds me so much of you.

I can of miss that finger jabbing into my eye.

[YABYUM]

I have bones.
I sit when I shit.
I have had my heart DESTROYED, cause was me.
it has never been the WORK that I enjoy.
it is just doing some thing, any thing that pays me.
I HAVE to work, like you.
I HAVE to wake, like you.
your age is more than mine.
THATS IT.
i hope.
whatever job rears it's ugly head, i enjoy.
i HAVE to.
i HAVE to make shit feel like gold.
THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE SENTENCE THAT DEFINES YABYUMS LIVING.

[stilltrucking]

the age enters because I am retired, i could get by on the money I get from my social security checks (for how much longe that lasts) and they used to tell me life is a shit sandwhich. I do what ever workd I find with all my might, the older i get the less i like half assed effort. believe it or not this scribbling I do I call it work, I scribble here, some sort of self anaylisis boring mostly to anyone else, and I think your shit is gold.

No idea how many jobs I have had, 500? thousand? some I loved, and when I thought it was a shit job I walked away from it not so much for the nasty job but from a nasty boss. . where do the children play, they play at work, gibberish